Estella (by Phillip Phirrip)

BY : Caligula
Category: Titles in the Public Domain > Great Expectations
Dragon prints: 3745
Disclaimer: This is a work fiction, based on Great Expectations by Charles Dickens.

Estella (by Phillip Phirrip)

Yes, it was her hands I remembered most. Even in these later hours of my bachelor life, I remember her hands. As I stood in the Havisham estate, destitude, cold and afraid of being spotted at this dank cavernous ruin, I counldn't help but just hope that she would remember what today was and and what it would mean to me if she would see me here again today. Her lilly white ivory hands that never knew toil but knew me well, yes I could almost feel them brushing my unkept hair from my collar and I could almost hear her breathy sweet voice whisper., "are you the new help?" A giggle, then nothing. Silence.The cold wind angrily blew my hair and reminded me of my lonliness. She who was beaten and hurt by men whom she said she loved, will never know how much I loved her. I had never married, as is the case with a London bachelor one step from debtors apartments. I had a few ribaldrous encounters here and there but I always felt as if I was being unfaithful to my true love, Estella Havisham. Estella married twice and both times the louts were drunk and abusive and no where near deserving of her. Years have past and she has been widowed and divorced, respectively. Perhaps now is my time again to hold this rare treasure in my arms. Now at the age of fourty-eight though, I know I only come here this day each year as a sad token to the most exalted and hallowed day in my memory. Losing a small fortune is one thing, but losing your true love, that is the thing people love to hear about. I soon close my eyes and I see that day as if it were today. Jaggers had warned me of love, its unpredictable nature and how it snares even the most steadfast of men into idle minded sentimentality. In stead of heeding his warning however, I decided to visit the Havisham estate with not one quid to my name and a heart full of uncertainty. The evil ghost of that old witch I felt watching me from every portrait of her on the yellow stained walls. Miss havisham, whose unrequited love cost me my love, oh how I wish some people could die more than once. "Shh, little Pip, if you have come to tend the garden, I am afraid the lady of the house is out and the garden is in utter disrepair." The voice was familiar but the candle lit face was different. The lines and wrinkles on her face gave hedistdistinction and sophistication where there was once just a little girls smile. "Estella", I said. My voice trembling with boyish want. "Could it really be you?!" "Pip, I knew I would find you here." Her eyes regained that same mischievious glow that charmed me my whole life. "I am glad to see you." She grabbed my hand delicately and lead me to our spot on the atrium where we first met eyes. Her ladylike manners and grace were hampered by her painful history, I could tell as she stumbled slightly as she walked with me. "Estella, I am glad to see you too. I was actually hoping that I ..I mean you and I." "Could be friends? Pip please, we have always been friends and I truly doubt that it was friendship that brought you here tonight." Estella interjected with force. She looked down knowing that she stepped over the line of good manners but I didint care. Maybe it was the moon or the light jasmine perfume in her flowing black hair, but my heart raced with joyous anticipation for what the night may have in store. "Come, Pip." She lead me further by the hand through the once sculpted gardens and into the antechamber where she set down the candalabra and started to cry. I embraced her softly. "Estella, I .." her beautiful tear filled eyes looked up at me with a vulnerable innocence the likes of which I had never seen in her before. "I know..Phillip..I know." She whispered sweetly. "I have always known and it has not been easy to to accept your love, not after being beaten, lied to and deceived by all those that I dared to love, but I accept it now." Her tears turned back into that little evil grin I knew so well. "And I love you too, Phillip Phirrip." I decided that It was time for me to take charge. I ended our nearly endless embrace to carry her to the master chambers. Visions of old lady Havisham haunted me, but I fought forward to the room where I would become one with my love. As I entered the room with my would-be bride in my arms, I stood and exhaled a long breath of expectation, finally realized. I set Estella to her feet, and I could tell that no one had lifted her in such a way before because she was extremely grateful yet hesitant to be on her own two feet again. Estella, with coyness aside, sat on the large spralling bed and unveiled the curtain for me to enter. I lighted the candles with nervous hands and quietly entered her bed. "I knew this day would come, I prayed and hoped for this day." I whispered to Estella as she layed me down next to her and kissed my waiting lips. Even though I had kissed her before, I couldn't help but feel that it was the first time. She got up and stood at the foot of the bed, undressing. I willingly began to help. Undressing Estella was like unwrapping the most beautiful present. Each inch was a wonderful surprise of new satin-like skin for me to touch. Her corset was loosed and was quickly retired to the floor. Her breasts were full and beautiful, and even though her age was now advanced, her body was still as picturesque as I had ever imagined. Her petticoats and bustle were as quickly dispached. I quickly rose, and as well was soon undressed. Naked and unabashed we embraced and explored every inch of each others bodies. She passionatly laid me down once more and I entered into her love rythmically. Our passions getting the better of us as we joined as one with all heart, mind, body and soul. Her pleasure filled eyes met mine as she moaned and constantly whispered that she loved me. Her arms and legs wrapped around me as to never let me go. I was finally at peace. This is where I belong. FInally collapsing in sweatly unbridled affection, we lay together just holding each other and looking into each others eyes. " I have always loved you Pip." She whispered into my ear. I kissed her forehead and ran my fingers through her beautiful hair.

At that moment, I could take no more. my dream was over, soon my delusion would be gone and I could once again be found standing alone in the cold air all these years later, waiting for someone who would not come. Perhaps its was all a dream, after all who would believe that a commoner turned wealthy bachelor, and once more impoverished wretch could win the love of this unbelieveable beauty. As my mind turned from that memory, I swore that I heard the angry wind turn a calmer temper and the smell of jasmine and honey once again filled the air. A familiar voice was distant but clear. it came closer. A delicate hand touched mine. ........"Pip could it really be you?! I knew you would be here".

 



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