Reviews for The Least I Can DoBy : InBrightestDay |
JayDee suggested that I should check out this story since I have read the other stories and might find it interesting. A good thing that he did since I have actually been thinking about reading this when I saw the talk about it on the forum but I had missed that it was already posted in the books section.
Quite an interesting read even if I am not really that interested into Abrahamic folklore. Still there are many details that I appreciate; the talk about Sodom and Gomorrah was spot on from point view for instance. I don't think this story is very interesting if you have not read the other stories, but I am glad it is posted here.
Spoiliry part: One thing that I cannot help thinking is that long time period gives the ending a poetic touch but that long period is seriously also the only thing that makes this not active canon (or previous canon-ish).
Every part of angels reactions fits very well the current state of the Whore of Heaven story and your The Woman in the Statue sequel. Considering what Luzruial have to experience in the statue even 80 years of the angels doing nothing seems a lot to me...
As for poetic touch for the ending...if it was my story I would consider to keep the expected prison time but having the angels receiving the answer "trust in humanity" when they question why they cannot free her. She ended in the torture because she did not trust humanity to save themselves and if she are to get free is up to the humans.
This story promises angst and the angel of death and it fuckin’ delivers. If you’ve clicked here you’re maybe deciding whether to read it or not, well, I say read it! It ain’t that long and it’s well written.
SPOILER HEAVY REVIEW.
This thing’s still as emotional as it was when I first read it. Like I said then, It’s a very emotional piece. I really felt Azrael’s pain for his dear friend and that he’s still going back after billions of years every day just to be with her... That bit at the end made me tear up for sure, and it’s basically all my fault. He just goes, and he holds her hand, and hopes she knows he’s there.
I suppose any folks who were upset about changing the ending of Whore of Heaven to fit with The Woman in the Statue at least now have this “What happened next” ending.
I really like how you’ve now got Lailah in this rather than Uriel – not because I know you have plans for her, but because before Uriel was just kind of one dimensional. Someone else for Azrael to speak too, but not any more especially invested than any other angel who might have known and liked Luzurial. By doing it this way and getting to show the angels of Conception and Death together, and Lailah’s strong personal connection to humanity it really brings the character into it.
Then, where before Uriel just has his last statement and doesn’t appear anymore, you’re able to use Lailah and Bernice to show that it’s not just angels upset by what’s happening. Totally adds another layer into it, and it’s nice to see Benice went somewhere decent after death I guess. Old ending to WoH or new, she’s still dead. Michael's "I KNOW!" badass wingbeat remains pretty awesome too.
I guess everything in this story up to 140 trillion years later is canon compliant with The Woman in the Statue anyway? If you do get back to Lailah later on?
Was the idea to have the marble and gold pyramid as a landscape feature suggested by the little Egyptian girl as a character?
“There is a long silence as dread slowly builds, before Azrael chooses to focus on Earth, to see into the tortured city.”
The freaking Angel of Death has to steel himself to see what’s being down to his friend. That’s how you know it’ll be bad :(
His flaming scythe idea is pretty cool though! The whole reaper imagery really works.
She doesn’t deserve this, not in the least, and he hopes one day the Seraphim will reconsider, that one day he will be told he can free his friend.
That ending through. The damn Seraphim! *Shakes fist!*
While AFF and its agents attempt to remove all illegal works from the site as quickly and thoroughly as possible, there is always the possibility that some submissions may be overlooked or dismissed in error. The AFF system includes a rigorous and complex abuse control system in order to prevent improper use of the AFF service, and we hope that its deployment indicates a good-faith effort to eliminate any illegal material on the site in a fair and unbiased manner. This abuse control system is run in accordance with the strict guidelines specified above.
All works displayed here, whether pictorial or literary, are the property of their owners and not Adult-FanFiction.org. Opinions stated in profiles of users may not reflect the opinions or views of Adult-FanFiction.org or any of its owners, agents, or related entities.
Website Domain ©2002-2017 by Apollo. PHP scripting, CSS style sheets, Database layout & Original artwork ©2005-2017 C. Kennington. Restructured Database & Forum skins ©2007-2017 J. Salva. Images, coding, and any other potentially liftable content may not be used without express written permission from their respective creator(s). Thank you for visiting!
Powered by Fiction Portal 2.0
Modifications © Manta2g, DemonGoddess
Site Owner - Apollo