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Uncertain Realizations	By : firemaiden04 Category: Titles in the Public Domain > Anne of Green Gables Views: 27479 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work fiction, based on the Anne of Green Gables book series.

Chapter List
- 1-Chapter One
- 1
"I hear Gilbert Blythe has resigned from White Sands. He'll be off to college in the fall, I suppose."
Mrs. Lynde dropped this piece of news as Anne was leaning over Davy on the couch, and she immediately looked for any telltale sign of distress in Anne's pale face. To be sure, Anne felt as though the world had opened up beneath her feet and she was falling endlessly on a cold wave of shock. She had the presence of mind not to react, but she felt sheer panic rising and knew she needed to get away…away from the twins, from nosy Mrs. Lynde, and even dear Marilla.
She absentmindedly carried Davy upstairs and put him to bed, then immediately ran outside to the deepening dusk and into the orchard. As the panic rose in her throat, she began to gasp for breath and leaned against the sturdy trunk of the nearest tree, then slid down till she sat, curled up in a little ball, shaking and white. Tears streamed down her face as she thought of Gilbert leaving. Dear Gilbert, and she would miss him so much--but then, they were just chums; why should she succumb to this quivering mass of nerves over his leaving? She doubted that she would react this much even if she found that dear, sweet Diana was going away. She hated that she could never control herself and her emotions when it came to Gilbert Blythe. She was not in love with him, as so many of her friends and acquaintances secretly believed. She wasn't. But she really needed to be able to control this panic; whenever she heard of Gilbert coming or going--and the thought of him going away set her off again.
She sobbed unapologetically, lost in her sorrow, until she was shaken to her very core by the last voice in the world she wanted to hear at the moment.
"Anne?"
Anne shot to her feet but found she was unable to look Gilbert in the face. So instead she stared at his feet and quickly swiped away tears from either cheek.
"Anne! Good Lord, Anne, what's wrong? Is it Marilla? The twins?" Gilbert's alarm was so great that he immediately stepped forward and gently grasped her face in both hands.
Anne shook her head jerkily, but still found herself incapable of speech or eye contact.
"Is it Diana?" Another jerky denial.
Gilbert gentled his voice. "Anne, please tell me what's wrong. Please talk to me."
Anne shook her head again.
Gilbert softly swiped his thumb over a fresh tear. "Please, Anne. Whatever it is, I will make it okay."
Anne's breath caught at his almost unbearable tenderness. She couldn't take it, not right now--it was too much to withstand. To her horror, she found herself stammering out a reply. "It's--it's you--Gil--"
Gilbert was visibly taken aback. "Me? What did I do, Anne?"
She shook her head impatiently. "No--nothing, Gil--it's just--you're leaving..."
Gilbert stared. "You mean for Redmond?"
Anne nodded and sniffed heavily.
Gilbert didn't speak then, for a long time. But still they stood, her with her back against the tree, him standing with her face cradled between his hands. Her tears had ceased to fall, and now she was conscious of how close he was to her. She could feel the heat radiating from his body, and the prolonged heavy silence made her aware of every breath he took, the rise and fall of his chest, and every part of her tingled.
Finally, after what seemed like an age, Gilbert spoke. His voice was so intense Anne shuddered, but still she couldn't bring herself to look into his face. "You are crying because you don't want me to leave, Anne? Is it because you care?"
Anne tensed, but could neither confirm nor deny him. She stared at his chest and started to tremble.
"Anne. Look at me." She shook her head again, terrified.
"Look at me." Still she refused.
Then Gilbert slid one hand around to hold the nape of her neck, and slowly tilted her chin back with the other. She resisted as long as she could, refusing to make eye contact, but finally the tension was too much, and she met his eyes with her own. The intensity of those starry silver orbs caused a minor explosion inside of Gilbert Blythe. He felt himself snap, but didn't care. With an audible groan, he swooped down to claim her mouth with his.
Shock radiated through Anne, right to her very core. His mouth was firm and soft at the same time, and incredibly hot. She'd never been kissed before, not really; once Moody Spurgeon MacPherson had dared to try and steal a kiss from her, and the memory of her outraged response had kept him awake for weeks. But this--it certainly was nothing like Moody.
She felt a little lost and uncertain--what was she to do? But Gilbert didn't seem to notice. He stroked her tongue with his own, and she couldn't bite back the moan. It served to excite Gilbert further. He deepened the kiss, and Anne was truly lost. Gilbert dropped the hand from her chin and slid it down to the small of her back. He pulled her against him more firmly and moved his mouth to her neck, just below her ear.
“Oh, Anne,” he moaned as he nuzzled her, biting her flesh softly. Shivers shot up and down Anne’s spine at his attentions. Her legs wobbled and she clung to his shoulders to keep from helplessly crumpling to the ground. Heat coiled inside her and she was overwhelmed with her uncertainty. What should she do? Should she pull away from him and run back to the house? Should she stay and let this continue? And if she stayed…and she didn’t want to admit to herself how badly she wanted to…what was she to do? She was so inexperienced, and she felt more than a little helpless and out of her league…surely she shouldn’t just stand there, passive and unmoving, while he did all the work.
Gilbert pulled away slightly and glanced at her face, then gave a low, husky laugh that made the shudders skip down Anne’s spine anew. “Oh, Anne. Your face really is just like an open book. Just relax. You needn’t worry so much about experience. This…you…couldn’t be any more perfect…” he trailed off as he absorbed the flush of Anne’s cheeks, the heaviness and heat of her eyes, and her slightly parted swollen lips. With a sharp inhale, he gently but firmly pressed her against the tree, reclaiming her mouth with his own; but this time, the kiss was more heated, more aggressive. His hands clutched at her as he changed the angle of the kiss, going deeper, and they both moaned. To Anne’s vague surprise, she suddenly felt quite wet between her legs—a very hot moisture that made her want to rub against something. She felt a hard ridge against her lower waist, and realized with shock and wonder that it was Gilbert. She wasn’t completely ignorant of sex; she had seen the farm animals plenty of times, though it had always confused her, and she’d never really wanted to think about it in human terms. But she felt awed that she could arouse Gilbert to such a point. She was vaguely aware that they were both making noises, gasping and sighing and moaning, and she wanted more. She instinctively rotated her hips forward, seeking something that she wasn’t even completely aware of. Gilbert gave a strangled cry as she did it, and moved his hands to her back, then lower, until he had gripped her ass with his hands and lifted her, stepping even closer to her. His erection pressed against the apex of her legs, hitting a mysterious spot so perfectly that they both cried out in shocked arousal.
Anne couldn’t stop the pleading noises coming from her as Gilbert rocked against her; it was all so instinctively precise. She had never expected her first kiss to be anything like this, anything at all. She had always envisioned lots of swooning and romantic poetry, and fevered “alabaster brows”…she would realize later that the “love-making” she always poured into the characters in her stories was incredibly flawed and naïve. This…this wasn’t flowers and poetry. This was raw heat, and instinctive movement, and animalistic noises, and coiling tension.
Gilbert leaned his forehead against Anne’s as he ground against her, the heat from her core evident even through her numerous layers of clothing and undergarments. He was already shockingly close to an orgasm. He panted helplessly between seizing fevered kisses, and one look at Anne’s face confirmed his suspicion that she had never experienced any of such an indulgent satisfaction. A wild determination seized him to be the first to give her that type of pleasure, and the idea instantly gave him the incredible willpower to delay his own release. His hands gripped her even tightly as he ground deeper and more firmly against her.
Anne suddenly felt a sharply rising and expanding sensation, and, frightened and uncertain, she shied from it, attempting to move away from Gilbert. Surprised, Gilbert almost released her, concerned that she may truly want to flee. But he quickly saw the helpless uncertainty, and rising climax, on her face, and instantly realized her insecurity. He gasped to her, “Oh, please, Anne…please, let me…”
The sensations suddenly reached their climax, and the hot, sharp shock of orgasm crashed through Anne. She gave a wild, gasping cry, hands clutching at Gilbert as her vision went white and she rode the wave of overwhelming sensation. Seeing Anne as she came made Gilbert give an honest-to-god whimper, and then his own release speared through him. With an intense moan, he came, shudders racking through his body.
They stayed like that, against the tree, panting as reality returned. Anne, still somewhat overwhelmed with the new knowledge that any sensation so intense existed in the world, and uncertain if she should be ashamed of it, quickly began to anticipate a terrible awkwardness, both immediately and in the future. What could she possibly say to Gilbert now, after such a sensual act? And how on earth would she ever be able to speak to him normally again? Gilbert inhaled deeply and rolled his shoulders, then looked down at Anne with a tender smile. Then he chuckled. “Oh, Anne. There was nothing shameful about this, darling. And I never want to make you feel awkward or uncomfortable.”
He gently set her on her feet, then stroked her face tenderly with one hand. “I will never try to guilt or pressure you into something you aren’t ready for, regardless of what we’ve had together. I would never use this to get something from you, Anne. I promise.” He softly kissed her. Anne gave him a small smile as she steadied herself on her still wobbly legs.
“Thank you, Gil. I think…I—” She broke off suddenly as they both heard Marilla’s voice distantly call, “Anne!” Anne jerked, immediately horrified, and rubbed both hands down her face, attempting to remove any trace of her recent experience. Gilbert chuckled as she hastily repaired her hair and straightened her clothes. She made to run towards the house, but hesitated and glanced back at Gilbert. Impulsively, she stepped towards him and gave him a gentle kiss on his cheek.
“Thank you, Gil,” she said shyly. “I…maybe I can see you tomorrow?”
Gilbert smiled. “Tomorrow, Anne.” And he watched with bittersweet reflection as Anne dashed towards Green Gables, quickly disappearing through the orchard in the deepening dusk.
- 1
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Uncertain Realizations