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Focused Madness	By : fusedtwilight Category: Twilight Series > General Views: 3772 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
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Chapter List
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Focused Madness
Chapter 10

Fusedtwilight: Thanks to my beta animegirlkiki for betaing, thanks to everyone who reviwed.
Last chap we found out Emily is Matthew's siren and in a moment of blood lust he attacks, the momentary fun game of baseball between wolves and vampires comes to a horrifying end and Leah is forced to protect Matthew from Sam.
Did I forget to mention she is fighting him all alone?
What will happen? Who will save her? Lets find out.

Leah P.O.V
We slammed into one another with a mighty crash. He tried to rush past me after he knocked me down, I was fast though I snapped at his back leg and caught his limb in my mouth, he howled in pain as I bit down.
I pulled back dragging him away from Matthew, I got up before he could snap at me with his jaws and stood in front of Matthew. He paced back and forth, trying to get find a way past me to Matthew.
He was treating me with kid gloves, if he wanted to he could mow me down and get to Matthew and finish him. But he was going easy on me. I may be quick but this wasn't about speed, this was a test of strength. As much as I hate to admit it he had me beat in that department. He was too big, too strong.
For once I was glad he still had feelings for me, the only thing saving me from a world of hurt and saving Matthew time was those feelings. He knew I was serious about this, he knew if he wanted Matthew he would have to make me bleed. I hated to have to fight Sam, but I would protect Matthew.
I tried to think what to do. Where was Jake? Shouldn't he and the others be phased right now?
“Ask and you shall receive,” Jake said.
Soon his mind and the others connected with mine. I saw they were running to where I was. Or at least Jake and Seth were, Quil and Embry had their hands full with Paul and Jared.
“Sam tricked us, he went to the elders and told them what happened. They called us back and demanded we explain what happened. I am sorry Leah; I did not think Sam would chase after you. We got there and he wasn't there and I realized what he was doing.”
“Just hurry up and get here, I don't know how much longer I can last,” I said.
Sam tried to rush past me but I jumped on his back and sank my jaws into his neck, he yelped and tried to shake me off.
“Hang on Leah, we'll be there soon,” Seth said.
“Easy for you to say,” I growled at him.
I pushed Sam to the ground and for one wild moment I thought I had him but he pushed back and sent me to the ground, I jumped back up and almost feel forward, my front leg was killing me.
A nearby howl made us both pause, they were close. Sam glanced at Matthew than me. I saw what he was about to do before he did it. He knew he was almost out of time, he had to act now. The kid gloves were about to come off.
“Leah look out he's about to pounce!” Jake yelled.
“Leah!” Seth screamed.
I braced myself, he was putting every ounce of strength and weight into this, it was not a killing move, but I knew I was about to be in a world of hurt. I could not avoid it; all I could do was meet him head on. I put all my strength into my back legs and sprung forth to meet him.
I let out a thunderous roar, lightning flashed across the sky as if answering my call. I saw the pain in his eyes. He hated this, hated himself for doing this but he was still going to do it. Because he thought it was right, because it was for the greater good, because he already had a list of ways to say he was sorry. He could write a fucking book on how to say sorry.
I knew what I was doing was pointless, pound, per pound he had me beat, he knew it, I knew it. But I was a Clearwater and we do not go out quietly.
Time seemed to slow down, images flashed through my heads. Us as children meeting in school, him coming over to have dinner with my family, him asking me out, his face red with nervousness, us going to see a movie, him and me watching the moon over the cliffs, our first kiss, us holding hands as we walked through school, our first time making love, him telling me he loved Emily, him saying how sorry he was for my father, him telling me I had a duty now, him telling me imprinting was all about making babies, so many good memories, so many bad. What would happen next fell into the bad category.
He shook and phased into a human, I saw his face full of shock and horror as he flew through the air to meet me head on.
BAM!
Thunder roared, it was so loud I almost could not hear the sound of flesh tearing, the sound of bones breaking. We hit the ground hard. The smell of blood was thick in the air.
“Sam?” I said horrified.
“What happened? Why did he phase?” Seth asked just as horrified.
I looked to my right. Matthew was awake, his hand held out, palm pointing at me and Sam. I knew it was him that did it; it was him that caused Sam to phase back.
“No one hurt Leah,” he said.
I was in shock. I looked back at Sam; my claws had pierced his chest. Blood flowed out in rivulets, he was still awake, he was making gurgling sounds, blood leaked from his mouth.
“Oh god Sam!” I screamed.
“Leah phase! He can't heal with your claws in him, we'll be there in a few moments,” Jake said.
I did not move, I was stunned. This was not right, it was not supposed to be like this.
“Leah phase back now!” Jake ordered.
I shuddered at the power of my alpha and phased back. Blood squirted from the claw marks. Oh God Sam!” I said.
I pressed my hands over his wounds. He was healing, but he was also losing a lot of blood, it was a question of would he heal before he died of blood loss. I glared over at Matthew, he was still sitting, watching me and Sam. “Matthew give me your shirt!”
He did not move. He flinched when I yelled at him.
“Matthew give me your shirt now!”
I was so mad, it was his fault. All of this was his fault. He should have never come to Forks. If he never come then this would have never happened. Damn him!
“Matthew give me your shirt or I will rip it off you're back!” I threatened him.
He got up and walked over, unshed tears were in his eyes but I did not let that stop me, he took his shirt off and I roughly grabbed it from him and he backed up.
I used the shirt to try and stop the flow of blood, Sam was so pale right now. “Stay with me Sam, stay with me,” I said.
His eyes were fluttering; he was falling unconscious, not good.
“Come on Sam, help is coming, think of Emily, you don't want to leave her do you? Think of the wedding, you still have to get married.”
The usual pain I felt in my heart was not there when the wedding was mentioned. I did not care about what could have beens, I was more concerned with what could bes’.
“Leah....told...you...dangerous....” he said weakly.
“I know, you were right, I will admit it you were right, come on just stay with me okay everything will be alright.”
“Me can take away pain, me can make him feel better,” Matthew said.
He reached out a hand but I snarled at him. “Touch him and I will fucking kill you, you understand me?”
He drew his hand back, he looked at me horrified. “Leah, me sorry, me wake up and see he hurting you, me just trying to protect you.”
“He was hurting me because I wouldn't let him finish your sorry ass!”
Tears fell from his eyes. I ignored them.
“Leah...so...cold,” Sam said.
“It's going to be okay,” I repeated. “Jake will be here and we'll get you help and you'll pull through and then you can yell at me and tell me what a dumb ass I am.” I laughed. “Imagine how Paul will raze you for getting your ass kicked by a girl, we'll laugh about this all year.”
His blood was beginning to stop flowing. I lifted the now bloody shirt. The wounds had healed mostly, he had stopped bleeding. His heart was beating so faintly.
“Leah,” he said my name but it was like his mouth was full of water. In fact when he spoke I could hear something wet in his lungs. Shit I must have punctured it!
I quickly rolled him on his stomach, I had to keep the blood from flowing into his lung or he could suffocate on his own blood. He groaned in pain as I moved him that was good, he could still feel pain.
I heard Jake and Seth. Heard them phase and kneel next to me. “I think I punctured a lung, he has lost a lot of blood and I broke some bones.”
“It's going to be okay Leah, we are here,” Jake said.
“Me sorry, me just wanted to protect Leah from the wolf man,” Matthew was crying.
“Shut up!” I yelled at him.
He jumped back and stared at me horrified.
I had to think. What was I going to do? I was in a lot of shit right now. So was Matthew. I can't be mad at him, I shouldn't. Sam had attacked us; if I hadn't stopped him he would have killed Matthew.
If it had been Paul or Jared or one of the other wolves I would not be this angry. But this was not just any old wolf, this was Sam. My Sam.
A howl in the distance told us we were going to have company. It was not one of ours. If Paul and Jared were fighting Embry and Quil then where was Sam's other wolves? Had the caught the scent of his blood?
A series of howls ripped through the air, panicked, distressed. Yep, they knew something was wrong.
“Leah you need to go now, if they show up and find out what you did I cannot guarantee they won't attack you.”
Leave...yes...leave. I had wanted to do it for so long. Leave. Leave this life behind me forever. Maybe it was time I did just that. Leave, start over. Forget my old life and make a new one.
Matthew was crying now. If I left him here Jake would not be able to protect him either. A part of me wants him dead, a part of me wants to watch the wolves tear him to pieces. Then I remembered the dream I had. Choices had to be made.
I promised him I would protect him. Clearwater's keep their promises.
I walked over to him, not caring if I was naked. “Listen, you are coming with me got it? I don't want to hear a single peep from you, understand, do as I say or I swear I will let the wolves kill you, got it?”
He nodded his head quickly. I turned to Seth and Jake. “I am taking the kid with me. Don't try to follow me, I will contact you.”
Jake nodded. Seth got up and hugged me. “Be careful Leah.”
I hugged him back. “I will, take care of mom, she'll need you when I am gone.”
“I will,” he said, a single tear fell from his eye.
I walked back and phased. Barked at Matthew. I lowered my back to him and I felt him climb on. I ran to La Push, I had some things I had to get.
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Matthew P.O.V
It hurt to be touching Leah, she so full of guilt, anger, loathing it make me feel sick. Me would like to make her feel better but me in enough trouble already.
She so mad with me it is being scary.
Me not remember much of what happened, me smell tasty girl and me kind of remember me chasing her and other humans, me remember the desire for her, me remember the pain when Kate-Kate shock me. Me kind of remember radiating fear so strong it paralyze others so they not interfere.
Than me wake up to sound of fighting. Me wake up and see Leah fighting black wolf. Me get mad and make wolf calm when he jump at Leah. He turn human and Leah squish him, but me get confused when she feel pain, shock, horror, stunned realization.
She so mad at me. Me know why. It being man she have feelings for. Me knowing she love man, they have connection see, it like mighty plant that once be big and strong, but now it withered and weak, it still alive, but it being much weaker than what it once was.
Me know they be much in love once, but it had been ruined by pain, betrayal, tragedy, bitterness, resentment. But no matter what the plant endures. They always have connection, deep in hearts they still love one another, but his love burn for imprint now and not even former love can compare to love of imprint.
That is why Leah being so mad at herself and me. She still loving man and now he hurt really bad because of her. We run and me not speaking, she very mad right now, so mad she might hurt Matthew so me being quiet so not to make her mad.
Me scared now, Matthew has been a bad, bad boy. Me not knowing what we be doing next, me not knowing what will happen next. What if no one want to be with Matthew now? What if they send Matthew away? Alone.
Me bite back sob. We run and run, me bury head in Leah's fur and take in her scent. It help make me calm. Me hope Leah forgive Matthew, me not know what me do if Leah not forgive me.
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Leah P.O.V
My leg hurt like hell as I ran to La Push, I had feared that I would run into one of Sam's wolves but I did not.
Soon I arrived home, I phased and grabbed Matthew's hand and went to the door. First order of business was getting some clothes. The door was locked; I looked under the welcome mat and found the key.
I unlocked the door and went running upstairs. I was too mad and scared to care about being subconscious around Matthew but still.
I dragged him into my room and quickly got a change of clothes. Then I quickly ran to my closet and found my old traveling bag, the one I used to pack when I used to visit Emily when she lived in Makah. I had not used it in a long time. It was big; I was able to pack a lot of clothes in it. After it was packed and I grabbed some personal belongings and then I looked under my bed.
I found the coffee can where I kept my money I had been saving up. I looked inside and counted. I found five hundred dollars. That would help, it was all I had. There was more in the bank but I did not have time to make a withdraw.
I ran into Seth's room and got a shirt for Matthew, I had to rip the bottom out to make it more his size but it was still too broad shouldered for him to wear but it had to do.
“Come on,” I said. I used my good hand and my injured one to grab his hand. I popped a pain pill and put the bottle in my bag. We went downstairs and I found mom's car keys. Someone must have driven her to where ever she was now.
I found a notepad and a pencil. I paused. What should I write? Goodbye doesn't seem good enough. Taking a deep breath I told her not to worry, that I was okay and I would call her soon. I also told her I loved her and I would miss her.
We went outside and I unlocked mom's car, I tossed the bag in the trunk. I unlocked the passenger side of the door. “Get in,” I said. He got in without a word.
I walked to the other side. I unlocked the door and opened it; before I got in I looked back at the house. I have lived here all my life. So many memories here. Good and bad. When would I see it next? Would I still be welcome if and when I came back?
God I wish I didn't have to do this. I wasn't just doing this just for Matthew. I was doing it for me as well. I have wanted to leave for a while, to try and sort out my life, away from Sam, away from the pack, away from La Push, but things kept on coming up that kept me from going.
But now I had to go, doing that to Sam....it made something snap inside me. I still loved him, even after all the shit we had been through I still loved him so fucking much it was pathetic. But seeing his broken and bloody body, knowing it was me that had done that to him....I had to leave.
Besides once his wolves find out it was me that did that there would be hell to pay. And Emily...God the thought of seeing her face after she finds out what I did makes me physically ill, I can see her in my mind looking at me with such hate.
I started the car and we took off. I wanted to floor it but I was trying to not attract attention. I turned the radio on; the silence was too thick and uncomfortable. We drove through the roads of La Pus. I kept on looking in the rear view mirrors, expecting to see one of the wolves chasing us or something. But nothing was there.
We made it to the boundary line and found a surprise waiting for us, a silver Volvo parked on the side of the road. I slowed down and came to a stop right beside the Volvo. Nahuel, Carlisle and Edward were waiting for us.
“Big brother!” Matthew said excitedly.
“Stay here,” I told him.
I got out. “I'm leaving, I am taking him with me,” I said.
“We know, Jake called us,” Carlisle said.
Edward walked over to me and handed me a credit card. “It has a five hundred thousand on it,” he said.
I took the card amazed. Fucking rich, dick vampires with their fucking rich credit cards. Must be nice to be immortal and have a load of money when the country is going through a recession.
“You should see Alice's card,” he said with a smile.
“Where will you go?” Carlisle asked.
“I don't know. I will call you but I won't tell you where. I don't want involved in any more vampire shit, sorry. But I am taking the kid with me, he is my responsibility, after what I did to Sam I can't just dump him on you guys.”
I know it was stupid, I wanted nothing to do with vampires but here I was hauling a hybrid with me. But I was serious; I had almost killed Sam for him. Besides If the Cullens had Matthew they would have to leave Forks, I could not let that happen to Jake and Nessie. If Nessie leaves Jake will follow her and Jake needs to stay in La Push to smooth things over.
As long as they did not know where he was they were free from the wolves’ persecution. It was a burden I was willing to bear, I mean I did just nearly kill my ex. Might as well continue to look after the little brat.
“Can I say good bye?” Nahuel asked.
“Make it quick,” I said.
He opened the car door and bent down to say good bye. Matthew cried as they hugged. “Me miss you big brother,” he said.
“I will miss you too,” Nahuel said.
“Will we be seeing one another again?”
“Of course, I promise, one day we will meet again,” Nahuel said.
He kissed his brother on the head. Matthew turned to Carlisle and Edward and waved sadly at them. “Bye, bye Carl-Carl, bye, bye Ed-Ed. Me sorry me being bad.”
Carlisle and Edward took turns giving Matthew a hug good bye. “You be a good boy for Leah, do everything she tells you, okay,” Carlisle said.
“Me will, tell Es-Es, Al-Al, Jas-Jas, Em-Em, Ro-Ro, Bell-Bell, Jake-Jake, Ness-Ness, Car-Car, El-El, Kate-Kate, Ta-Ta, Gar-Gar me said goodbye and me missing them too. Me promise next time you be seeing us me be better.”
“Take care of him,” Nahuel said.
“You can come with if you want,” I said.
He shook his head. “I have been in the wilds too long Leah, I cannot live like the Cullens, plus I could not leave my aunt. I would like to but I don't think you would like me eating humans.”
No I would not like that at all.
“Just make sure you call the Cullens, they will pass any messages to me.” he hugged me tight against his chest.
“I got to go,” I said pulling back.
He leaned forward and whispered in my ear. “I wish I could have had you one more time.”
That is one hell of a goodbye.
“Here take my Volvo,” Edward said tossing me the keys to his precious car. I looked at him shocked. “They could track your mother’s car. This has better gas mileage and goes faster.”
“Gas isn't an issue,” I said.
“The wasting of finite resources is everyone's problem.”
What a fucking hippie.
We switched cars and I tossed my bag in Edward's Volvo. After one last goodbye we drove off, Matthew waved at them until I told him to pull his head back in. I rolled up the window and turned on the radio. Piano music played on the radio. Big surprise.
I had no idea where I should go. So I just headed north. I decided to go to Canada. There were plenty of places I could go to hide. I just had to figure out where I was going to hide. It had to be somewhere close to civilization, I was going to need money, it wasn't an issue with Edwards card but still I was going to need a job eventually. Plus the money wouldn't last forever what with bills and food and stuff.
I did not stop driving until nightfall. I found a little motel on the road to pull into. I told Matthew to wait while I got us a room. I got a room with two beds and got the key from the guy at the front desk. We were close to the border, but I was too tired to keep driving, I was so mentally exhausted.
Matthew was still waiting for me when I got back. I grabbed my bag from the back seat and locked the doors and took Matthew to our room.
He went in quietly and sat on the bed and watched me, waiting for orders. I had nothing to say yet. I looked at him in his torn, overly big t-shirt and pants. I was going to have to buy him some new clothes. I examined him closely. I could pass him off as my own kid. Most people would look at his tan skin, dark hair and eyes and assume we were kin.
But he was growing up quick; he was already a few inches taller than what he was when I first met him. I was going to have to keep him from all human contact so we would not have to move so often. I sighed; I was too tired to think.
“Matthew you need a bath.”
He got up and followed me into the bathroom. I got the bath ready for him, making sure it was warm enough. I put soap in it to make it bubbly to give him some decency. It seemed ridiculous to help him take a bath, he looked like he was either six or seven, perfectly good ages to bath yourself but mentally he was lacking so I helped him.
I got him ready for bed. I tucked him in and turned the light off. We did not talk the entire time. When I bathed him, when I tucked him in not a single word was said. I stayed awake, no way I could sleep. Every time I closed my eyes I saw Sam's broken body.
What was I going to do? Where would I go? Could I really take care of Matthew all by myself? Would I see my home ever again? These and a dozen more questions raced through my mind. I listened as Matthew's breathing became softer and shallower; his heart beat slowed just a fraction. He was asleep.
I was glad one of us could sleep.
A few hours later I got up and went to the bathroom. I shut the door and sat down on the toilet, and then I cried. I was full of anger and doubt. My life had been going so good but now everything was all fucked to hell.
I could hand him over to the Cullens, but if I did that than they would leave because the wolves and Sam want him dead and Jake would have to be forced to chose between his tribe or his imprint and I already know who he would chose. La Push needed Jake; he was the only one who could fix things between the Cullens and the wolves.
And Sam, god is he okay? Is he alive or....no, I cannot think like that. Sam has to be okay, he has to be, if he dies....well...it is best I not think about it.
I wiped my face and went back out. Matthew was on my bed now. His breathing was still even. Either he sleep walked or he went back to sleep after he moved to my bed. He was curled up in a little ball even with the sheets covering him. Even asleep I could tell something was wrong. His eyes were moving quickly behind his eye lids and he made these small whimpering sounds.
I remembered him telling me how even in his dreams he remembers the fire. Even in his dreams he burns. Is it any wonder why he is the way he is? Not because his dad was a sick twisted freak who thought it was okay to knock poor human women up and let their spawn rip their way out of their bodies (man I hope he died a slow death)
It is because no matter where he is, awake, or asleep he is haunted by a burning pain so powerful it shattered his mind. And it followed him where ever he went. I walked over to the bed and lay down next to him. I pulled him close to me and hummed the Quileute songs I grew up with as a child.
His eyes stopped moving and his mouth curved into a slight smile, he went slack but stayed in a fetal position. He was like a child with his mother. I was going to have to be a mother now, I would nurture him, raise him, protect him, teach him, feed him. Everything a mother was supposed to do.
The world was so dangerous for him, more so than it is for humans or vampires. How many would use him? How many would abuse him? How many would kill him? Was he aware of the danger he truly was in, of the chaos he could bring? I doubt it. How do you tell someone who can hardly speak right the complexities of life?
I had no idea what life had in store for me or him, but I have made my choice, I will protect him. No matter what.

Fusedtwilight: So it was Matthew who saved Leah who in turn accidentally horribly mangled Sam. Now her and Matthew are on the run, where will they go? Where will they live? Stay tuned and please review.
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Focused Madness