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Tears of the Phoenix	By : serialcabbit78 Category: S through Z > Valdemar Series Views: 1397 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do NOT own ANY of the rights to the Valdemar Series, those all belong to Mercedes Lackey, who has given me the inspiration. I make no profit from this or any writing.

Chapter List
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Stefen woke the next morning to hearing Luna and Kasie talking. He wasn’t sure what they were talking about for several moments, and it took several moments to fully wake up. He stretched a little and sat up. Luna looked over to him and gave him a smile. She turned back to Kasie and took up on the conversation.

“Well, given the things I went though there, I really had no reason to trust him. I guess it seems absurd to think that you could trust someone the instant you meet, but that’s how it was. I can’t explain it any other way.” Luna said.

“Well, you soon had a good reason to do so.” Kasie said, patting Luna’s hand. “Good morning Stef. Luna and I were talking about you.”

“Morning… and nothing bad I hope.” Stefen chuckled. “I look better today, Luna.”

“I feel a little better, though still a little sore. The healers said that’s normal.” The girl shrugged slightly. “I had a strange dream last night.”
“You wouldn’t be the only one. Excuse me, ladies.” Stefen said as he slid out of bed and left the room.

“With your gifts, it’s possible that you saw him connected to Vanyel. That’s how you knew he was trustworthy. It makes sense, too.” Kasie chuckled. “Especially given what happened yesterday. They would not have allowed him to be a mentor to us if he wasn’t someone good.”

“Stefen’s never treated like a child for one. I’ve tried to get him to talk about some things, but I understand why he doesn’t.” Luna said as Stefen came back, carrying a plate loaded with food. “Last night, I can’t be for certain, but I think we dreamed about the same person. He was sitting where you are, Kasie, and he was telling me that something happened to him, like what happened to me. He said that he had help from some Healers, but it was Stefen that helped him the most.”

Stefen carefully sat on the side of the bed and started eating. When Luna spoke of her dream, he was shocked. He thought he had dreamed of Vanyel, but he couldn’t be certain. The room was like the one they shared when Van was alive, and he definitely felt it when Van touched him.

“Well, sweetie, I think it’s a good thing you are here. How did you get away?” Kasie asked. “They got that new lute of yours back, it just needs new strings.”

“Honestly, I don’t know. I don’t remember much from the time I started tuning my lute until Stefen found me in the shower. It’s just vague shadows.” Luna shook her head. “It wasn’t until after the Healers took care of me that I could speak with Surya. I’m glad they didn’t break that.”

“It seems odd that they did this, I mean if I wanted revenge on someone like that, I would have harmed your hands or voice. Unless they wanted to break you so bad that Surya would abandon you.” Kasie said with a frown. “Somehow, given the mentors we have, I don’t think they could do that.”

“Unfortunately, Kasie, I have to agree with you. I think this is something deeper, but only time will tell. The way to cripple a Bard is to destroy their ability to make music.” Stefen said. “This seemed personal, like they wanted to destroy her.”

“Why though? I don’t know many outside of the Heralds, Jisa and Lord and Lady Ashkevron. No one I know would have any influence on him.” Luna said. “So to blame me personally for his lack of getting into Bardic is rather absurd.”

“I think I know, little one. I have connections to Lord Withen, not that I ever use them. Some could think that he had me scout you out, but the fact that you are first and foremost a Heraldic Trainee outright disputes that.” Stefen said. “There are those who don’t understand anything at all when it comes to Gifts or being Chosen. They think you pay your way into being a Healer, Herald or Bard.”

“I’m poor, Stefen. I’m poor and I’m an orphan. I wouldn’t have the money to even dream of buying food, let alone training.” Luna said. “So how do they explain that? When those of poor backgrounds get in when the rich don’t?”

“That is a very good question, one you might want to bring up when you get back into classes. There are many trainees in all three types of training that come from varied backgrounds, as it’s the Gift that gets them that training.” Stefen said. “When I was made Master Bard, I had to give up several privileges of that Rank because it hadn’t been long since I made Journeyman.   There was a lot of jealousy about it as many did not realize I have a twist.”

“What do you mean by that? I always thought Bards had a good way with words or music.” Kasie said.

“Stefen can ease pain through music. Yesterday, when the Healers worked with me, they were able to work directly on my injuries while he played. Healer Kathlee said that they were able to work on the worst of them without using pain blocks.” Luna said. “He made Master because King Randale was unwell.”

Stefen set the plate closer to Luna and motioned for her to eat. She nibbled a little bit, as if she was unsure the food would stay down. His heart ached seeing that her usual sparkle wasn’t there. She should be out enjoying time with her Companion or playing music. She should be sitting with her friends just chatting, not sitting in bed. This is something she should have never had to deal with. She picked up a slice of bread and nibbled it, leaning into the pillows.

“Maybe later we can get Thad to take you out to Surya; I think that would help you.” Kasie suggested. “I know she’s worried about you.”

“That may be a good idea.” Stefen said softly. “I know you aren’t comfortable going out of these rooms all bruised up, but the fresh air will do you some good.”

“I don’t know, I’m so sore,” Luna sighed. “Besides, what if someone thinks I got in a fight?”

“Girl, they ain’t gonna think that. Most have already heard you were ambushed. They don’t know the worst parts, but plenty of the Trainees are mad enough no one will mess with you.” Kasie snorted. “Not only that, let any boy besides Trey or Michael get near you and you’re gonna have a swarm of angry Companions guarding you.”

Stefen chuckled at Kasie’s sassy reply. She was right though, though he was sure it would be more than just Companions. One shout from the girl and there would be a sea of greens, grays, browns and white between her and anyone who bothered her. Not only that spending time with her Companion would help her in the long run. Having Yfandis had helped Vanyel; he just wished he had the other helpers. True she had access to a mind healer if she chose, but most of her recovery would be how she worked through the process.

“This isn’t something that is easy for any of us, little one. I know it’s so hard for you, but if you ever need to talk, you know I’ll always listen.” Stefen said softly. He pulled Luna close and held her gently.

:He had to go through this very thing with Vanyel. He understands your pain and fear more than you realize. True he and Vanyel were lovers and he is your friend, he still understands.: Surya said. :I’m very glad you still trust him. If you are not feeling up to visit today, I quite understand.:

:I could see the pain in his eyes when he found me in the shower yesterday. It was like he instantly knew what happened, but why can’t I remember it?: Luna frowned. :It is all fuzzy and shadowy.:

:You were in shock. I’ll help you when the memories start to come back. Take him up on the offer to talk, too.: Surya gave her a gentle mental caress.

“Surya says she understands if I don’t visit today. Even if Thad was to carry me, I don’t think I can handle moving around that much.” Luna laid her head against Stefen’s shoulder. “Stef, how did you know what happened to me?”

“I saw the blood on your legs. I could barely bring myself to ask of you were on your moon days. That and you had the look Van had after I got him calmed. That was a very hard thing to watch your lover go through.” Stefen kissed Luna’s head. “It breaks my heart to see you going through it.”

He wondered how long Luna would be able to handle him being around her.   He would give her anything she needed, and he remembered how hard it was for Vanyel to let him touch him. He knew this could be affecting more than she was letting on, but she wasn’t the vibrant girl he knew. There was a shadow over her that he knew could be there for a very long time. He could feel her shoulders shaking with silent sobs. Kasie moved to sit on the side of the bed and gently rubbed her back. In a few moments, the silent sobs became louder.

“Luna, sweetie, it’s alright. We’re right here, breathe honey, breathe.” Kasie said softly.

Stefen felt her arms tighten around him as she clung to him, sobbing. It had been a long time since she’d cried like this. It was just over a year ago when she ran into him in the Sorrows.   That night before they met was a situation so similar to yesterday he wasn’t sure how she would react. He had an idea.

“Luna, do you remember Starwind and Moondance?” He asked her softly. She nodded and looked up at him. “Do you remember what Moondance told you that night he held you? I know what he said to you was just between the two of you, but think back on it.”

Luna thought back to the last night they spent in the forest with the two Tayledras. She’d still been facing down the memories of what happened before she met Stefen. Moondance and Starwind both had helped her with the worst of the memories. Moondance had told her that she caused none of the bad things that happened to her, and if someone hurt her in that way, it would never be her fault. He’s said many other things, but what she remembered most was just the tenderness.    It was the same tenderness she’d felt when Stefen held her and when Eric had.

“The love of a father is not made of blood, but the pride he feels in the child he holds.” Luna whispered. “It’s why I trust Herald Tantras and you. Why I was able to trust Lord Withen and Eric. Because you all have a father’s love, and even though you and Herald Tantras aren’t exactly fathers, you are proud of the children you help.”

“May I ask what brought your tears?” Stefen asked.

“I had a few flashes of memories. He had two girls hold me down. They tore my clothes and kept hitting me before he…he” Luna gulped convulsively. Stefen held her tenderly as Kasie pulled the plate away. “He was naked and forced his… it hurt so bad and I kept screaming.”

“It’s alright, you’re safe now. You know where you are?” Stefen said softly.

“Of course I do. I’m with my mentor, Stef. Why do you ask?” Luna smiled up at him, a small glimmer of her sparkle showing in her eyes. “You thought I was trapped in the moment?”

“I did, but I’m glad you are able to relate it to me. I know it can take victims a while to process things, was it still in flashes or something more?” Stefen asked, smiling warmly as Luna scooted closer to him. This could be encouraging.
“It is still hazy flashes, but that one was clear. The girls kept him from hurting my hands or choking me. They’re in the other classes in Bardic, the ones without gifts.”

“I know the ones. Lynnell may have the list of who was asked for. I’ll check with her tomorrow when Thad can sit with you.” Stefen said. Those on the board would not be happy with this news. He didn’t want Luna to pull in on herself the way Vanyel had. This would be a tricky path to lead her down, and he knew most of the pitfalls.

“Luna, listen to me, you have a better hold on yourself than most victims in your place. You’ve got the support of us all in these rooms, all our fellow Trainees. You’ve got most of Bardic behind you as well as the Heralds.” Kasie said. “There are probably a few who have gone through something like you have, and we can help you.”

“For now, I think I will be more comfortable with you, Thad and Stefen around me. Can our Healers do sort of what they did, Stef?” Luna seemed to be processing things quickly, but the fact she was still next to him gave him hope.

“I think so, but let’s wait until you feel a little more ready.” Stef said. “I think the memories may not come easily, but don’t try to force them”

“He said that, in my dream last night. He said that because I was stunned from the blow to my head, it could affect how I remember things. He thanked me for caring for his instrument.” Luna said. “It’s just so frustrating, I want to remember what happened, but it’s just mists and fragments.”

Luna pushed the blankets aside and sat up on the edge of the bed. She stood and tried to take a few steps before Kasie jumped up to help her. The older girl led Luna into the privy and shut the door. Stefen got up and dug out some clothes to wear.   He dressed quickly then looked at the time candle, noticing it was well after noon He hadn’t realized he’d slept that late when he got up.   He had been exhausted yesterday when he got in, and it was late when he finally got to sleep. On top of that, he had used his gift to comfort Luna.

He took his now empty plate into the outer room, and heard a knock. He opened the door to find Lynnell standing there with Breda. He ushered them inside and offered them a seat. The anger in both Bard’s eyes could have melted the entirety of Haven. He wasn’t sure what had gone on, but if their stony looks were anything to go by, it would not bode well for anyone who dared irk them.

“So, we’ve gotten some idea of what was to happen yesterday. Seems that the good Lord Jacobi never even sent his son out of the palace grounds after all. The idiot boy has been here hiding in Lord Downly’s suite all this time. Apparently when the hired buggy left here that was supposed to contain young Nicolas, a new servant entered Downly’s staff.” Breda explained. “For the three moons you’ve been gone, they had two girls in the minstrel classes watching Luna’s coming and goings.”

“Once they got an idea of her schedule of arms practice, working with her Companion and her playing for Lady Treesa, they hatched the plot to have her play for a garden reception.   The two girls asked her to practice with them, with Luna playing a lute. The girl had just bought one not too long after you left.” Lynnell took over. “They requested only Luna at first, but we told them that she can only play solo for ladies groups. So they asked for a group of 4 players, with her as one. Hindsight is that we should have realized something was up. Especially when two of the girls came to us after the fact and confessed their part.”

“They confessed?” Stefen gasped “Luna said the girls kept him from hurting her hands or choking her, but that they did hit her.”

“One of the girls was his little plaything and he had her convinced that Luna wanted him. The other went along, until they realized that she was quite young. They only arrived after his little fuss over not getting into Bardic died down, so they didn’t know the full story.” Lynnell shook her head. “I’m not sure what to make of this mess.”

“Lord Withen has requested that Luna be escorted when she plays for Lady Treesa. That means either you or Herald Trainee Thad will have to be with her. We can get others to volunteer but all involved have been banished from the grounds.”

“Good riddance to all of them. Was Nicholas good at all to even get minstrel lessons, or was it a put on?” Stefen asked. “The boy is well versed in his instruments, but I take it he didn’t have the drive?”

“He didn’t have the creativity it takes to spit.” Breda said nastily. “Not only that, he thought he could BUY the gift. I can’t say it pained me to deny him.”

“I’d say you took rather vindictive glee pitching him out. The thing I don’t understand is the boy isn’t at all like you, and I think you picked up on that.” Lynnell gave Stef a knowing look. “Seeing as you turned him down.”

“I choose my lovers quite carefully now, and just looking at him disgusted me. I know he’s only a few months older than Trainee Thad, but has less maturity than I did when you found me.” Stefen chuckled. “Besides, he’s shown his tastes run to those who are younger.”

“You should have heard the shouting match last night. That hard headed Lord Withen verbally took Lord Downly and Lord Jacobi on with such a sharp dressing down, I would be surprised a few Bards don’t write about it.” Lynnell chuckled. “Considering it’s quite the scandal and quite criminal, I am glad they won’t.”

“She doesn’t need to be hearing that, not right now. I am personally glad that she has him to champion for her though. I’m betting Withen was quite close to knocking both their heads together and telling the Goddess they died of natural causes.” Stefen shook his head. “I doubt the King would say otherwise.”

“You’re right there. They’re all going to rot. Both Lords were stripped of all lands titles and everything and their families are out for blood, but the funniest thing is.” Breda’s face took on a very smug vindictiveness. “It’s their blood they are after, not yours or Luna’s.”

“This is one time I wish to the Havens I was a Herald. I’d love to set the truth spell on them and force them to tell the whole scheme.” Stefen sat back on the couch. “Then again, I’m afraid I would have had to kill them after.”
“Well, I can’t say I can fault you there. This wasn’t just a random student, it’s one that you personally are connected to. She’s your friend and your protégé. My guess is, and it is only a guess as we were not privy to the whole questioning, that it was just another idiot who thought they could charm you into glory hunting Vanyel.” Breda shook her head. “The thing is, all the lad had to do is study the songs, but no, he has to go and seek you out and try to play bedfellow.”

“You know, the few times I did listen to him play, he did tend to try to play the songs Van favored, and that just killed it for me. When he played Shadow Lover, he made it sound like the worst drivel ever. Havens, when Vanyel sang it…”

“It pulled at your heart.” Lynnell said. “I don’t think anyone understood how much he hurt, and that song just magnified his pain.”

Kasie came into the room and flopped on the couch. She looked tired and she looked like she’d been crying. She sat quietly just seeming to take things in. Stefen wondered Luna had recalled more of what happened, but looked to see that the door to their room was still open. It seemed that Kasie may be in conversation with her own Companion, who would most certainly be in touch with Surya. If Luna needed them, they’d know.

“She’s alright. She’s sleeping. I just feel so helpless.” Kasie shook her head. “If she needs us, she’ll call out through Surya.”

She got up and went back into the bedroom, shutting the door. Stefen rose to follow her when a flash of memory struck him with such force, he sat down heavily. He blinked his eyes several times, and swore violently.

“Damn! A moon or two before I went up the Sorrows to find her, Lord Jacobi asked me to play at his eldest son’s wedding. I was there for a few days, and Nicolas cornered me to hear him play. Until the feasts were over, I didn’t have the time. The last night, however I caved and let him play. He wanted to know if I could detect the Gift in him, and I was exhausted, but I tried. I simply didn’t feel it, but there was just something that felt odd. He tried to ask if I would tutor him, I told him I had a whole lot going on and would be leaving the area he lives in. I told him to talk to you, Breda. He tried to offer sexual favors, and I turned him down outright. He started into Shadow Lover, and oh…” Stefen trailed off. “His father had to know where I went, but why. She’s a Heraldic student, why go after her?”

“I think they thought you turned him down in favor of her. They didn’t count on the fact that I picked up on some sort of manipulation in the boy. He DID have a trace of the Gift, but he was misusing it. That’s why we denied him. It had nothing at all to do with you.” Breda said. “They thought they could get you thrown out and have your Mastery revoked, but you never used your gift on her until AFTER what happened yesterday.”

“We’ll take this to Lord Withen, thank you Stefen.” Lynnell said. Both women rose and left the room.

Stefen got up and went back into his room, and just watched as Kasie held Luna’s hand. They were both beautiful young women, Luna’s soft creamy skin was a lovely contrast to Kasie’s golden chocolate tone. Kasie had a motherly air to her that seemed to comfort the younger girl. He wondered exactly what had brought this whole situation about; it should have never been a personal vendetta as the girl had nothing at all to do with the boy getting into or being rejected from Bardic.
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Tears of the Phoenix