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Wish I Could Love You Out Loud	By : MelissaMaxwell Category: > Robin Hood Views: 2039 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Robin Hood, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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The bells in the steeple rang, signaling the end of another day. Henry washed his face at the town fountain and combed his hair with a bone comb. He looked at his reflection in the water, the dimming light only giving him a hint of his appearance. He wondered what he looked like to Aubrey. Was he really talking about him when he said his lover was the most beautiful person in the world? Henry couldn't see it. His features were rather squared off and ordinary where Aubrey was tapered and graceful. Aubrey was the beautiful one with his long, silky, red locks. Henry's mother forced him in a chair once a week, plopped a bowl on his head and cut his hair to jaw length. Did he smell alright? He tried to remember when his last bath was. He was well aware that he probably smelled like sheep. He wished he could afford a little rose water, but even soap was a pricey luxury. He felt pleasant tremors run through him as he thought of the pleasures he would take part in this night. He paused to pull up a few wild daisies growing in the crevices near the fountain and hurried off to his tryst.

Aubrey trembled as he watched the sunset from behind the livery stable. He was awash with so many emotions. Fear was there. As was excitement. So was joy. But the one overpowering emotion he felt was love. He had heard tales of courtly love before. Wandering bards exalted the notion of love, much to the consternation of parents whose children rejected the sensible spouses selected for them. Aubrey had wondered what it would be like to feel that way himself, and now he was finding out. Henry. His Henry. His best friend and, tonight, his lover. He hoped he smelled good for him. Flowers smelled nice, but the dyes they were made into often did not. He had washed up as best he could but his hands were still a pale cast of blue from the cornflower dye he helped his father prepare. He had wished for a mirror so he might better fix his appearance, but made do with a metal pan. For the first time he seriously thought of his nose as being too long. He wondered what Henry saw in someone as scrawny as him. The thought of Henry's muscles made Aubrey all a tingle.

"Here you are, my love." Aubrey melted at the sound of Henry's voice. He flushed when Henry put the daisies in his hands. "Not as lovely as the cornflower you gave me and far from as lovely as you."

"Oh, Harry...." Aubrey was too flustered to speak.

"Do you know how beautiful your hair is at twilight?" Henry asked. "The setting sun burnishes it, highlighting all those beautiful shades of red. I don't know which shade I like best." Henry stroked Aubrey's hair. "Perhaps I like them all."

"Harry," said Aubrey. "Do you remember the make-believe games we played as children?"

"Quite fondly." said Henry. "But surely you don't believe this is a game."

"Not at all. I just remembered how as children we played at being adults."

"Ah, yes. We'd play at being knights. Sticks as swords, rain barrel lids as shields. Jane a William's would pretend to be a princess to be rescued. And then there were our make-believe hunts. My little sister Edith would pretend to be a unicorn and we'd chase her." Aubrey put a finger to his forehead and let loose a whinny, making Henry laugh. "But, perhaps you are thinking of when the girls would play 'house'. I'd sometimes agree to play the role of the father when a girl wanted me to play. Then I'd say I was off to work, then I'd find you and we'd go swimming or play ball or find some other diversion."

"There was another game that the girls were fond of." said Aubrey. "One they needed boys to play. We'd often play 'wedding'. The 'bride' would bedeck herself with flowers and wear a dishrag as her veil. The 'groom' would twist some straw to make a ring. She'd choose a maid of honor; he'd choose a best man. The 'priest' would put a towel about his shoulders. Or hers; we had a few girls pretend to be the priest. I suppose your daisies reminded me."

Henry smiled, picked up a few strands of straw and quickly twisted them together as he spoke while looking into Aubrey's eyes. "I, Henry, do take you, Aubrey, as my beloved. To have and to hold from this day forward. I will love and honor you for better or worse, till death do us part." He twined the straw about Aubrey's left ring finger and kissed his hand.

Aubrey gasped as he clutched the daisies to his heart. Then he made his vow. "I, Aubrey, do take you, Henry, as my beloved. To have and to hold from this day forward. I will love and honor you for better or worse, till death do us part." They both pulled each other close and kissed. Suddenly, all fear, all guilt, all vestiges of misgivings were blown away like cobwebs in a tempest. Only joy and love remained.

"Let me make your dream come true." Henry whispered to Aubrey. Henry swept his beloved off his feet into his arms. Aubrey laughed as he flung his arms about Henry's neck and let himself be carried across the threshold. "The hayloft." Henry whispered breathlessly. "So we won't disturb the horses." He deposited his precious lode next to the ladder. "After you." he said gallantly. Aubrey smiled at him and scrambled up the ladder, Henry following.

With a cry of joy, Henry pinned Aubrey down on the hay and lay across him, kissing him. "Oh, how I love you, Aubrey." he said with a smile. He nuzzled his beloved's neck. "Shall I undress you? Or shall I undress myself first?"

Aubrey shuddered. "Oh...oh, undress me, Harry. Strip me, love me, make me yours!"

Henry pulled off Aubrey's boots and rubbed his cheek against the instep of one foot. *I love him so much!* Henry thought happily. *I love him all the way to the tips of his toes!* He watched as Aubrey unfastened and laid aside the hooded cowl that laid about his shoulders. He would have moved on to his tunic if Henry hadn't stopped him. "Getting ahead of yourself, my love." he said gently, staying the other man's hands. Henry stroked the length of Aubrey's legs. "What long legs you have." he said, tenderly rubbing him through the linen of his breeches.

"They're long enough to reach the ground." Aubrey quipped.

"Have you ever had anyone touch you, Aubrey? Has anyone touched you here?" Henry gently rubbed the swelling in Aubrey's crotch, causing him to let out a long, deep moan.

"Never!" he gasped. "You'd be the first." *And only, as far as I'm concerned.* Aubrey mentally added.

"Let me show you what you do to me." Henry laid Aubrey's hand on his member. Even through thick cloth, Aubrey could feel heat and hardness. "This is yours, Aubrey. All of it. Just for you, my love." Aubrey gave it the gentlest of squeezes. "By Jesu, I've only gotten your boots off!" laughed Henry. "And already I feel completion is near!"

"Then I'd better leave it alone." Aubrey took his hand away.

Henry unlaced Aubrey's breeches and pulled them away, revealing long, slender, shapely legs with pale skin contrasting with light, gingery hair. "So very beautiful." Henry crooned, stroking the thighs. "Do you ever touch yourself, Aubrey? Touch yourself, here?" He tenderly cupped the package made by Aubrey's breechclout.

"I-I try not too." Aubrey said as Henry undid his tunic. "But, I sometimes have dreams, and I wake to find my hands pleasuring myself."

"Don't ever deny yourself pleasure again, Aubrey." Henry said, kissing bits of exposed skin. "I want you to feel the utmost pleasure. I want you to feel good all over." He pulled the undershirt up over Aubrey's head. With a tug at the string keeping the breechclout on, Aubrey was wonderfully naked before Henry's eyes. He looked in awe at Aubrey's body as he smiled coyly, his skin flushed from his hairline down to his nipples. It was mildly different from how he remembered it being last summer. He was paler, with not quite so many freckles. Everything was more developed, more defined. The penis was standing stiff and proud from a nest of coppery coils, leaking fluid from a ruby head that slipped from the foreskin. Gently, he urged Aubrey to turn over, exposing his milk white buttocks. Henry marveled at how they were just right for his hands. The flesh was velvet soft. It was like squeezing a not quite ripe peach. Aubrey was panting from excitement. Henry abandoned the exploration of Aubrey's body to undress himself.

Aubrey watched awe struck as Henry stripped down for him. The boots came off first. The cowl and tunic quickly followed. Aubrey's mouth went dry as Henry pulled off his undershirt, stretching and flexing those lovely arms as he did so. The sight of Henry's bare torso made Aubrey feel hot all over. Henry smiled at Aubrey and began to unlace his breeches with tantalizing slowness. He stopped halfway to run a hand over the swelling in his groin. Aubrey squirmed as he watched Henry touch himself. He was starting to sweat. The breeches were slowly pushed down to reveal slim hips and firm thighs. Aubrey had seen Henry stripped down to swim before, but never aroused until now. "Can- can I touch it?" he asked, looking at the solid rod of hot flesh.

"Only if I can touch yours." Aubrey's long fingers wrapped around Henry's member and began to squeeze. Henry let loose a low moan of delight. "Oh, Aubrey, my dearest Aubrey...." Henry moaned gratefully as Aubrey pleasured him. Aubrey let his free hand explore Henry's strong, beautiful body. The shoulders and biceps were so solid. The flesh on the underside of the arms was tender and made Henry shiver when he touched there. The tiny, rosy nipples were fascinating. Running a fingertip over one made Henry whimper. Aubrey quickly took his hand away. 'That felt good!" Henry assured him. "Do it again!" Aubrey teased Henry's nipples with one hand while squeezing and pulling on his manhood with the other. "Oh...oh yes....oh....oh God!....Ooooh!....Aubrey! Aubrey! AUBREY!" Henry shouted out his love's name as he climaxed. His hot seed spilled over Aubrey's hand.

Aubrey knelt back as he admired the spent body of his lover and smiled. That had been his name Henry cried out. It was his own hands that wrung gasps of pleasure from that precious body. He had made his beloved feel good. Strong hands now gripped his shoulders and pushed him down on the straw. Aubrey shuddered. Now, he would be the one to be pleasured to depths he had never imagined.

Henry wrapped a large, strong hand around Aubrey's member. He alternately squeezed and pulled down its length. *Rather like milking a cow.* Henry mused. That gave him a wicked idea. He had seen how cows fed their calves....

Aubrey bolted upright with a yelp as Henry took his penis into his mouth. After the initial shock, he looked into Henry's smiling, blue eyes. He also found he liked the moist warmth of Henry's mouth. "Just...just don't bite me, alright?" Henry's answer was a slow, gentle suck. Aubrey fell back on the straw and moaned Henry's name. He gazed down adoringly at him and stroked strands of blond hair as Henry suckled at his member.

Aubrey gasped and moaned at the delectable sensation. Henry's tongue was pressing and lapping against his member as those strong hands clenched his buttocks. Thos hands grabbed for his hips when Aubrey involuntarily began to buck. "More...harder....Henry!" he sighed as ecstatic warmth flowed through him. He was drowning in pleasure he had never known.

Henry found he rather like sucking on Aubrey's member. The smell was heady and musky. The texture was firm and smooth. The taste was hot and salty-sweet. He loved the sounds Aubrey made when he was enjoying himself. He looked up and saw the most beautiful thing he had ever witnessed. Aubrey's chest heaved with panting breaths. His face was an expression of pure bliss. His eyes were softly closed as his mouth gaped and smiled all at once. Aubrey shivered as his face contorted, almost as if in pain as the penis in his mouth pulsed harder. "Oh, Harry! Oh! Oh! Oh!....HARRY!" A thick, hot stream of seed shot into Henry's mouth.

Aubrey fell back on the hay, still floating on a cloud of ecstasy. He felt Henry lay next to him. "How do I taste?" he asked.

"Very nice." said Henry. "Like this." He put his mouth to Aubrey's, letting him sample his own essence.

They twined their arms together and held each other close. They had each other. They had their love. They wanted nothing else.
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For weeks, the lovers had their own secret paradise. As far as anyone knew, Henry and Aubrey were just boys who had been great friends for years. They sometimes felt a pang of envy when they saw a man and woman walking arm in arm. The envy was quickly forgotten when they met for a tryst. Barns and stables after dark were a favorite as were silos, storage sheds and the sheep cote. There were ruts and other little hide-aways deep in the forest. One of their favorite places was a place sheltered by the boughs of many weeping willows. When the weather warmed they swam together and made love in the lake. They once made love in an overgrown field of wildflowers while a rainstorm drenched them. Henry would always cherish the memory of watching Aubrey throw back his flaming, dripping hair as droplets slid down his body and he thrust maddeningly against him. Aubrey would always remember the one night when Henry daringly snuck into his bedroom. It was just like something a lover in one of the romance tales would do.

Not only did they try many places, but many ways. They explored each others' bodies, finding new ways to pleasure each other. Aubrey found that Henry liked having his testicles caressed as his penis was sucked on. Henry daringly explored Aubrey's tight passage. Aubrey found the sensation startling, yet arousing. He nearly passed out from sensory overload when Henry found a spot up inside him that made him glow with pleasure. Henry wanted to insert his penis into the tight, tiny hole, but Aubrey found the experience too painful. While swimming, Henry convinced him to try it again. It was much more pleasurable now. Henry's hands held his belly and chest as the hot shaft slid in and out, hitting the sweet spot inside him. When he regained his erection, he returned the favor, sliding in and out of Henry's tight, hot hole. They experimented with various lubricants, from saliva, to cooking oil, to spent seed, comparing what felt best.

But it wasn't completely sex. They were still best friends as well as lovers. They worked together and played together. Aubrey tried to teach Henry the letters, but Henry didn't see much use for them. Henry tried to show Aubrey how to use a sling, but Aubrey's aim was never very good. His skill with the staff was improving, though. They would fish together, sitting close enough together for their hips to touch. They'd make up games to entertain Henry's younger siblings. They attended church together. They could often be spotted around Nottingham in each others' company. It seemed for a while they could be happy with their secret.

Aubrey woke one morning and hurriedly dressed and started his chores. The sooner he was finished, the sooner he could join Henry out in the Shepherds' field. They would likely spend the evening just watching the sheep, but any time spent doing anything with Henry was good.

"Where are you going?" asked Aubrey's mother.

"Just off to get some water, Mum." he said, holding up the bucket.

"You let Anna do that." She gave the girl the bucket and sent her on her way. "Aubrey, I have the most wonderful news! You know Farmer William?"

"Of course, Mum. He's our biggest supplier of cornflowers."

"And you know he has a daughter named Jane?"

"I believe so."

"Well, your father and I talked it over with Farmer William and, we all think it would be a splendid idea if you were to marry Jane!" The woman beamed. "Isn't that delightful?"

"M-marry?" Aubrey could scarcely believe it. "Me, married to Jane?"

"I knew you'd love the idea!" she said, completely misinterpreting her son's response. "We're going over to the farm today to discuss the particulars. Dowry, bride price, living conditions and all that sort. You needn't worry about it. Just take your time to get acquainted with Jane a William's and we'll have a wedding as soon as the Holy Father says we can."

"W-wedding? Holy Father?" Aubrey stood in absolute shock.

"Now, go back to your room and change. Put on that nice green tunic I embroidered for you. It brings out your pretty eyes."

Henry had once said the same thing. "Mother, I only wear that on Sundays."

"Today's a special day too. Come now! Spit-spot, no more dawdling."

Aubrey couldn't believe it was happening. He walked in a mechanical stupor to William's farm. "There now, lad." said Master Dyer. "I know you're nervous. I was too once." Only, Aubrey wasn't nervous. He was horrified. He was torn between wanting to cry and wanting to vomit.

"There's no need to be nervous." said Mistress Weaver. "You've known Jane a William's since you were children. She's a perfectly nice girl. Hard working and sensible."

"Pretty too." Aubrey's mother gave his father a baleful glare. "I-I meant for a young woman!" The dyer's wife was no happier with this. "That-that is to say, she's pretty enough to marry....I'm digging my own grave, aren't I?"

Normally, Aubrey would have snickered at his parents' banter, but he could find no laughter in his heart that day. He couldn't marry. He couldn't! He had already pledged himself to Henry.

Farmer Williams greeted them gaily. He embraced Aubrey who stood stiffly. "My new son-in-law!" he said proudly. "You sit here and have a chat with your future bride while your parents and I sort things out. Olivia! The cider!" Jane's younger sister went about serving the guests.

Jane was seated on a divan. Like Aubrey, she had been instructed to make herself more presentable. She was wearing her Sunday dress and had her black hair brushed to a gloss and framing her pretty face. Usually, it was tied up under a kerchief. "Hello, Jane." he said awkwardly.

"Hello, Aubrey." she responded. "Won't you sit down?" Aubrey took a seat not too close too her. "I know, it is a bit of a shock, this marriage our parents want."

"Do-do you want to get married, Jane?" *Please say no.*

"Father was quite generous." Jane said with a smile. "He told me which boys he approved of and said I could have my choice. And, well, I chose you!"

"Why?" Aubrey tried to keep the accusation out of his voice. *It's not her fault.* Aubrey reminded himself. *She doesn't know.*

Jane sighed. "Shall I tell you the honest answer?" Aubrey nodded. "Father told me to choose between you and Henry Shepherd. He liked both of you and couldn't decide between you, so he had me decide. And, well, Henry's nice, but he'll need a woman who will give him a lot of children. I only want one or two. Three at the most. My mother died in childbirth, you know."

"Yes. Yes, I know."

"And you're nice too, Aubrey. I'm sure I'll learn to love you in time."

"Learn to love me?"

"Aubrey, you don't seriously believe all those tales of romance and chivalry, do you?" Jane laughed. "I admit, I loved those stories too. My favorite memory as a child is when I pretended I was a princess and Henry pretended to be a dragon who was going to eat me up and you came to my rescue. But, Aubrey, now it is time to put childish things aside. I know you will make a good husband and loving father, and I will do my best to be a wife you can be proud of."

*I don't want a wife! I want my Henry!* Aubrey thought, panicked. His parents soon returned. "Well we mustn’t leave the two of you alone for too long." said Farmer William's. "Not until after the wedding." He chuckled a bit.

"We've settled everything." said Mistress Weaver. "Jane's dowry will be a cow, five hens and a goodly plot of land. Her brothers will build a nice cottage for the two of you on that land. For our part, we'll make Farmer Williams two new suits of clothes. One fit to work in and one fit to give his daughter away in at the wedding. Now, say good-bye to your bride, Aubrey. We must be off to speak with the Holy Father."

Aubrey nodded and stood. He turned to Jane. "Good-bye, Jane." he said simply and left with his parents.

"You might have said something more than merely 'Good-bye Jane', you know." Mistress Weaver said as they left the farm. "They'll think you don't want to marry Jane at all. You might have given her a kiss on the cheek. I'm sure Farmer William wouldn't have minded. Are you attending to me, Aubrey?"

"Yes, Mum."

"I've said it before, and I'll say it again." said Mistress Weaver. "Jane a William's is the perfect girl for you, Aubrey. She's not too thin to give you children nor so fat you'll go broke trying to feed her. Oh, your children will be lovely! And Jane will be the perfect help mate for you. She's a gentle girl with a good head on her shoulders. She's practical, honest, hard working, modest, dependable, pious, handy with a needle, a good cook...."

"And she doesn't talk too much." Master Dyer added, earning a glare from his wife.

"May-may I go?” asked Aubrey. "You surely don't need me to talk to the Holy Father."

"Where will you go?" his mother asked.

"To Shepherd's field."

"Oh, I see!" Mistress Weaver smiled. "You want to ask that nice boy, Henry Shepherd to be your best man. Are you sure you wouldn't rather have Andrew do the honor?"

"I-I'd rather have Henry, Mum." *But not as the best man.*

"Very well, off with you then." she said. "But take care not to muss up your tunic."

Aubrey hurried to the field where he knew Henry would be. He was first greeted by Galahad, the Shepherd's herding dog. "Down, Galahad!" Henry called to the dog that pranced and wagged its tail about Aubrey. He stood from the rock he had been sitting on and watching the sheep graze, crook in hand. "Aubrey! Good to see you! But, why are you so dressed up?"

"Henry, hold me."

"Certainly." Henry hugged his beloved. He was convulsing with the effort not to cry. "There, there, now." Henry rubbed Aubrey's back. "Whatever's wrong?" Aubrey clung desperately to him. "Come, sit here next to me." He led him to the rock where they sat together. "Now, you tell Harry what the trouble is. I hope you won't mind if Hubert overhears a bit of it."

"Hubert?" Aubrey wiped away a few tears.

"Our newest lamb." Henry laid a hand on the head of a lamb that had ventured close. "Sara went into labor last night, and I looked at the lamb and said 'His name is Hubert.' Fits him."

"You shouldn't name the sheep, Henry."

"Why not? Counting them would make me go to sleep."

"What if you had to sell Hubert? Or eat him?"

Henry put his hands over the lamb's ears. "I'll thank you not to mention such things in front of Hubert!" he said in mock seriousness.

"What I'm trying to say, Henry, is that if you care about something too much, it will just hurt all the more when you lose it."

"Tell me what has you so upset, Aubrey."

"Henry, my parents want me to marry Jane a William's. They're talking with the Holy Father even as we speak." Aubrey shook his head. "I can't do this! I can't pledge myself to another when I've already pledged myself to you!"

"Oh, Aubrey." Henry pulled the boy close and stroked his hair. "Aubrey, I suppose we should have seen this coming. My parents will probably expect me to marry before long."

"I don't want anybody but you, Henry!"

"Nor I but you." Henry tenderly stroked his lover's back. "But, Aubrey, we know they won't let us be together. We can't go on this way."

"I wish we could. I wish I could tell the world how wonderful it feels to love you."

"Wishes can't always come true, Aubrey. It would be burning at the stake for us both if anyone were to find out."

"Henry, I can't let you go. You're part of me. The best part of me. I hoped you felt that way too."

"Oh, Aubrey, I do, I do!" Henry pulled him close and held him tight, as if he'd never let go. He kissed his cheek. "But, listen, it would probably be a good idea for you to marry Jane."

"No!"

"Shush, listen. Marry her. I'll still be there whenever you need me. It may be a good idea to have at least one child with her."

"Have a child!" Aubrey sputtered. "That-that would mean I'd have to...." Aubrey flushed. "I couldn't! Henry, I'm not attracted to her in the slightest. You're the only one I want to share my body with."

"I love you, Aubrey." Henry said. "I always will. But the heart and the body are two different things."

"Jane is a nice girl." Aubrey conceded. "She deserves a husband who truly loves and desires her. Not someone who only pretends. I hate this, Henry."

Henry pulled his love close and blinked at the tears stinging his eyes. He could say nothing for the lump in his throat.

That Sunday, the banns were announced for Aubrey the Dyer's son and Jane a William's.
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Wish I Could Love You Out Loud