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I'll See	By : StargateFanatic Category: Twilight Series > AU/AR > Slash Views: 2311 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or make any money from this story.

Chapter List
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Look, guys! It's the second chapter!!! :)

The next morning, I was late because I didn’t know if I really wanted to go to school again. I almost didn’t go, but then I thought of Whitaker… I wanted to see him.

When I walked in late to Forks High, I could hear Lynn yelling at somebody. Her voice is so annoying and snobby…

“I don’t care. I saw how you were fawning over Jasper yesterday—” God, she was still trying to be possessive of me. Will she ever take a hint?

“What are you talking about? And I don’t fawn!” That was Whitaker. Was he really fawning over me? I can tell he’s nervous… In fact, he was desperately trying to hide the anxiety and fear.

“—and you’d best back off unless you want it blabbed over the school that you’re a fairy.” I was almost to the door.

“Do you see any sparkling pixie dust on me?” Confusion emanated from the room. “Do I have any wings?” I stepped into the room and stood a little ways behind Whitaker. “Then, with the evidence you’ve just seen, or rather, not seen, it can be proved that I am not a fairy. I was not, nor will I ever be, interested in Jasper Hale, or any other man for that matter.” My heart fell at his words. I should have known not to get attached to anyone again. Everyone just leaves.

A self-satisfied smirk crossed Lynn’s face. “Good, but I think he heard you.”

I didn’t have time to hide my shocked expression before he turned his dark green eyes to me. His eyes were saturated with sorrow, shame, and pleading, as was the air around him. He looked as if he was about to say something, but I didn’t want to hear it. I bolted.

A snicker and the words, “Looks like he didn’t like what he heard,” spoken by Lynn followed me down the hall before I blocked all voices out.

I’m leaving, Edward. Don’t follow me. I mean it.

I didn’t stay long enough for him to find me, as I was already in my car and driving to the house. I don’t have a home anymore… Alice took that feeling with her, even though the Cullens still say they consider me family.

The entire ride, I couldn’t help the hurt washing over me. I’ve only known him a day, so I shouldn’t be hurting this much, right?

I sighed. Obviously not.

When I reached the house, I parked my car and ran. Just ran. I wanted to be as far from Washington as possible. If I was being honest, I was trying to run from the hurt.

It didn’t work.

I made it to the border of Alaska before I calmed down and just sat in the tree-covered mountains, letting my emotions go for a bit to relieve the stress. There was no one near, so I wouldn’t affect anyone with my hurt, my anger at myself, or any of the other tumultuous emotions running through my body.

I couldn’t believe I let someone affect me after Alice left, and someone I barely knew. I quit talking after she left; I felt like I had nothing to offer to conversations anymore. I mean, I’ve always been quiet, but I never spoke after she left.

Damn it! I told myself I would quit thinking about her!

I pushed her out of my thoughts, and Whitaker took her place.

What am I going to do?

I sat there for almost 24 hours before I decided to head back, resolve strong in my nonexistent blood.

I wasn’t going to let anything bother me anymore. I wasn’t going to let him bother me.

Deep down inside, a tiny voice murmured, But it still does…

I returned to the house Thursday night, but I still refused to attend school the next day. No one pushed me, though I could tell they were relieved I was home.

To avoid any of their questions, I went to the clearing I had made for myself nearby. I didn’t make it symmetrical in any way, because disorder seemed to fit me so well.

I sat on the stone bench I had placed near the center and blanked my mind. I didn’t want to think anymore, I just wanted to relax in my clearing.

And I did relax…until Edward brought Whitaker to the house.

I could smell him, though it was muted since he was still in Edward’s car.

As I stood to run again, Edward called out to me, “Jasper! Don’t you dare!”

Why not? I thought back.

“He just wants to explain to you what happened. Give him a chance.”

What if I don’t want to? Besides, there’s nothing to explain.

“I know you’ve heard it from me, but just listen to him.” He paused, waiting for me to reply, but I had none. I turned to the far side of the woods. “Jasper, don’t do this. You’ll hate yourself if you don’t hear him out. You can feel when he’s lying, so let that be your guide.”

I can wait. I don’t want to hear it right now.

“Come on, Jasper. No one can wait forever.” I heard the car door open, and Whitaker’s scent was suddenly stronger.

Vampires can.

He chuckled. “Even we can’t wait forever.”

He was right, and he knew it. It would bother me if I didn’t get this talk over with.

So, I walked out of the woods and back to the house.

Whitaker stepped forward, beside Edward, a nervous smile on his face.

“Hey, Jasper,” he said quietly. I only nodded, not quite ready to talk yet. His face fell slightly, though he hid it fairly well.

“Do you two want to talk out here?” Edward asked.

“It doesn’t matter to me. Wherever Jasper wants to go.”

I turned without a word and headed back to my clearing. The footsteps that followed a few seconds later let me know Whitaker had taken my silent cue.

At the clearing, I sat on the smooth stone bench and patted the spot beside me.

“I’m really sorry, Jasper, for what happened,” he began as he sat down. He told me everything Lynn had said, how she had basically cornered him. “I just… I don’t want everyone to know about me.”

I’ve never understood why people allow what others think to affect them; the only opinions that matter are those that love and care for you.

“Why do you care what people think?” I asked quietly, breaking my vow to remain silent. I just can’t not talk around him.

He sighed, resignation permeating his tone. “It’s not that I care. I just don’t want to be bullied all the time anymore. At the other two schools I’ve been to, when they found out about my…orientation, I was bullied and made fun of incessantly. I was kind of glad to move, even under the conditions I was in.”

“Humans can be so close-minded,” I muttered.

“What?”

Damn it. “I said, ‘People can be so close-minded.’” Please believe me…

“Yeah, but my parents didn’t seem to mind when I told them. That’s why we moved the first time. They wanted things to be easier on me, but the kids were all the same. We didn’t have the money to move again.” He fell silent.

“I’m sorry I overreacted.”

“You didn’t overreact. I shouldn’t have said what I did.”

“No, I understand why you did.” I almost wanted to thank him for sharing some of his past with me, but I couldn’t bring myself to say it.

He touched my hand, and he said the words for me. “Thank you.” He laced his fingers in mine. They almost burned me with their heat, but I welcomed the feeling. At least I wasn’t numb.

“For what?” He didn’t really have anything to thank me for, did he?

“For hearing me out. I didn’t think I’d get a chance to apologize.”

I nodded, understanding what he meant. As I sat quietly, he began to study our clasped hands.

“What are these?” he asked, tracing one of the many bite marks that marred my body.

I jerked my hand back, breaking contact. I really didn’t want to—really, I couldn’t—go into details about my past and why I was so scarred. “Nothing,” I snapped, maybe a little too harshly.

He sighed, disappointed, but he didn’t push me. “It’s beautiful out here,” he said instead.

If he’s going to act like nothing happened, I can as well. “It’s my thinking place.”

“I can see why. Very peaceful.”

I nodded and set my hand on the bench between us. I wanted to touch him...or maybe I just needed to. His touch calms me. He copied my movements, and I wrapped my pinkie around his. He smiled a tiny smile; I caught it out the corner of my eye and returned it. My throat tingled with the distant burn of thirst, but it didn’t seem to really bother me. That had never happened around any human. Well, for me, it hadn’t. Edward was a different story.

That tiny connection between our bodies, just our fingers, sent warmth up my arm and I decided then and there to quit running away. I couldn’t promise to stay or that anything could ever work out, but I wasn’t running.

Yet.

What do you think? Up to par?
DBZchick--First review! lol Thank you so much! I was worried (still am) that I didn't adequately catch Jasper's torment or his thought processes.
Kiki--Thank you. :D And I promise to definitely keep working on it. :)
TheBlindQueen--Yay! :) Don't you just love anticipation?
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I'll See