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Things Change	By : kaguyahime Category: A through F > Ender's Game Views: 3255 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters or have anything to do with the Ender's Game series or its author, no profit is being made from this

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12.25
"So I want you all ready by six thirty, eat at supper if you must but not too much, the last thing I want is people throwing up."
Ender's announcement of the extra training was met with a resounding groan, they had been looking forward for a small amount of free time and now they were getting a large amount of hard work.
"They may not be as strong as we are but they are going to have more manpower so if we are going to have any chance of beating them we need to be of our game and totally prepared. Any suggestions will be welcomed, anyone got questions?"
No one answered, Bean shrugged and Petra have him a small, sympathetic smile when she noticed the scowls.
'Well' Ender thought to himself as he walked away 'whether they like me or not doesn't matter, we get the job done and that's all that counts.'
He echoed down the corridor heading nowhere in particular, he had had his head buried in written word all morning and was beginning to feel like an ostrich but without the option to pull up. Alai had once mentioned trying to meditate but Ender had never really gotten the hang of it and to make matters worse had caused much amusement when his legs went to sleep and he got stuck. After regaining some dignity he had snapped that there was no point without the music anyway.
Ender paused as he came to where the corridor parted then chose the direction of Mazer Rackham's office. He was early and he doubted his tutor would appreciate it but he was used to the criticism by now and early was better than late.
The door was faintly ajar and Ender approached cautiously, his feet now making no sound on the metal, and hesitated outside.
Rackham was sat on the floor, legs crossed and eyes closed. His breathing was calm and the top few buttons on his shirt were left open for ease.
Ender felt the familiar tremor he had experienced in his dreams and wished he knew what Rackham was thinking.
"You're early, Wiggin" Rackham opened an eye and glanced over
"I thought it better to be early than late, Sir"
"You know I don't like to be disturbed"
"Sorry, Sir"
Rackham sighed and got to his feet, buttoning his shirt, his eyes bright behind the dark tattoos.
"I...I guess I am slightly uptight about tomorrow" Ender cursed himself inwardly for sounding so stupid.
"You know full well that it is nerves that will get you killed, and stop stuttering, boy" his voice was calm but Ender picked up annoyance in the accent.
"I'm not nervous! I'm bothered because although we are winning my army is not performing as well as they might despite me putting them through their paces. They're falling apart."
"Them or you?"
Ender bristled at the question but could give no retort, Rackham continued
"Because from what I have seen and heard you aren't exactly in top form yourself" despite Ender's savage glare his eyes never left him.
"But don't think I will be any easier on you, in fact I could use it as an excuse to be a lot harder" he looked at Ender's uniform "but before anything I am giving you five minutes to get yourself tidy, as a commander you are supposed to lead by example and you look a mess."
"Yes Sir..."
"I will meet you in the study when you look more respectable."
Six minutes later Ender emerged to find him waiting impatiently
"You're late" Ender didn't respond, early or late he could never please him "but at least you're tidy."
Ender wandered to the desk and sat down while Rackham scanned the rows of old film and footage, despite being many the films actually contained very little in the way of strategical information. In fact most of his ideas Ender developed from the enemy formations.
"Why is there no more of you, Sir?" It was a question Ender had wanted to ask for some time "students could learn so much from you and the only film we have is of that last battle."
"Why would there be any?" Rackham had found what he was looking for and came over, brushing Ender's leg as he did so and he knew he would feel that touch for hours.
"This was a battle fought very early on, the buggers outnumbered us by almost double but victory was still ours although we lost a fair few men..."
As he continued Ender felt himself drifting off into a daydream and his normally attentive eyes fixed themselves on the outside.
Space lay all around, a vast expanse of void dotted with stars like glittered like diamonds on an ebony canvas.
He suddenly felt very alone and wished he could move closer to his teacher, just to feel another presence beside him and share what warmth there was.
"Wiggin!" His head shot up at the sudden sound
"Sorry, Sir"
"If you're not going to listen then I am wasting valuable time."
"Why don't you tell me anything more about you and how you worked? Or even anything about yourself?"
"Because you don't need to know that" Rackham said irritably.
'I don't even know what else you do here' Ender continued in his head, more daring in his thoughts than he ever was out loud 'and I'll find out whether you want me to or not. I could use it as a useful skill for the future.'
For a second his mind drifted back to his dreams and Rackham saw a strange, glazed look come over to boys face. It caught him off guard and for once he hadn't a clue what to say to bring Ender's attention back.
It was an uncomfortable cramp down below that brought him back to the present time and Ender closed his legs tightly under the table
"Do you know how frustrating that was?" Rackham grumbled as they finished "I do hope this isn't a new phase you're going through."
"No, Sir...just distracted today but it won't last, I won't let it"
"Good" Rackham said no more and left for his quarters, Ender wished he could run through things with the others while they were still fresh in his mind and at least then someone else could remember them for him but no one was free yet.
He found himself hesitating where the passage split
'Not now' he chided himself and kept to his planned route 'too active now anyway, it would be easier to explore later in the evening.'
Later on when classes had finished Ender wandered down to Dragon's room, Bean and Dink were the only ones in the dormitory deep in discussion about the homes they had left behind and one of Bean's attractive neighbours.
"How'd it go?" Bean asked as he walked in
"Not too bad" Ender lied convincingly "he only went through footage that could be of use"
"Was it?"
"That remains to be seen but I got a few ideas I want to run through"
"Great, more work"
"Don't blame me; blame Graff if anyone" Ender snapped "I didn't ask for this to be added!"
"I'm not blaming you but I really think you need to let us know what's bugging you, you aren't much of a commander like this."
"Where are the others?" Ender said changing the subject "I'd like to let you all know what I thought."
"Petra's off with one of the older boys" Dink informed him with a small grin "and the others are in the longue."
"So you may want to wait a while" Bean added "or just tell us for now."
"Let's just say defence and dodging is more important than attack this time, I want to work on avoiding being hit as long as possible because it is certain we are one against two or more tomorrow. And that is the reason I am going to designate a couple of you as bait, it's a fact that we are going to have to lose to win"
He was acknowledged with two nods of agreement and was surprised how well the others took it also. His team seemed completely in control and their movement fast and fluid, not good enough maybe for two of the stronger armies but acceptable for whom they were against. For once he found himself offering a few compliments, they were strained and it seemed to ease the tension somewhat.
His main idea had been to use the stars as defence and attack from behind; Bean had added the idea of pulling it or something near in front of them if fired at. That had turned out a bit chaotic but it was a last resort and would as ever depend on what their opponents had in mind.
"No one threw up either so that's a bonus" he joked to Bean as he was about to exit
"Always is" Bean smiled "you sure you don't want to talk?" Ender shook his head, Bean didn't push and left.
Ender dressed slowly, the air feeling like ice on his warm skin but he wanted to be alone, it was late and he should have been heading back to his room but that wasn't his idea.
Not just yet anyway.
He actually didn't have a clue what he was doing as he turned down into the corridor leading to the teachers' quarters but his curiosity drew him on.
Every door looked the same, like their own rooms if you didn't know which you were in it was impossible to tell. The only one that was obvious was Colonel Dap's since Ender could hear him grumbling to himself from outside.
"Something you needed, Wiggin?" Ender span round to find Colonel Graff turning the corner behind him.
"No, Sir..." The older man looked at him sceptically "well actually I was looking for Major Rackham" well it was a half truth.
"Did he ask for you?"
"No..." Graff folded his arms
"Well if he didn't then you'd best leave him be, and you know full well you aren't allowed in this area. Commander of your army or not."
"Sorry, sir..." Ender dodged round him "I'd best get back"
"I can let him know you wanted to see him but don't let me catch you down here again, Wiggin"
"No Sir" Ender said with a tired sigh.
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Things Change