Neighbours | By : That-Girl-Han Category: Twilight Series > AU/AR > Het > Het Views: 2455 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or make any money from this story. |
I tip toed my way out of the bedroom, not wanting to wake Jacob, and quietly shut the door behind me. I had heard him come back in the room a little earlier, I shut my eyes and pretended to be asleep. I found it difficult when he was gently calling my name, then he gave up, huffed to himself and got in to bed beside me.
Urgh, my head was absolutely killing me. Plus my mouth tasted dry and unpleasant. I strode to my bag on the kitchen counter. Please, tell me I packed aspirin. Please. I frantically rummaged through my bag until I decided I wasn’t getting anywhere and tipped it upside down, allowing the contents to spill out. I let my bag fall from my fingers as I scanned the various stuff on the counter, trying to locate the familiar silver box.
Shit. I forgot to pack it. I inwardly groaned as another pain shot through my head. Fucking stupid hangover. Erggh! I brushed my hand against my forehead – it was clammy and hot.
I carried myself to the bathroom and ran the cold water. I dipped my hands under the stream of water before I lowered my face and splashed myself a couple of times, trying to cool my radiating face.
I let out a puff of air as I sat myself down on the cold tiled floor. At least it was keeping my legs and arse cool. I nestled my back against the bath tub and slowly dropped my head back to lean on it.
This was great. Absolutely fan -fucking –diddley -tastic. I’m such a bloody idiot. Who forgets to bring aspirin? I just hope that I’ll be able to find some tomorrow. Or, later today, if we’re being technical.
I gripped my stomach and hissed as a sharp pain jolted through me. Oh, excellent. Hangover and stomach cramps. This was the last thing I needed. I sighed as I mentally picked at what Jacob had said earlier. ‘You’re a fucking idiot… you’re making a complete fool of yourself’
I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt – it bloody did. It frustrates me to no end when he goes in to one like that, blaming everything on me. Yeah, so maybe I have been a little moody later. And, OK, maybe I have picked up the bottle more than is healthy but what does he expect me to do? Go around fixing things like him? Be completely emotionless?
My hands pulled in to a tight fist as another wave of pain washed through me, I thumped the floor with my fist a couple of times, trying to take my mind off it.
But things were good…weren’t they? Jacob and I weren’t at each other’s throat but that didn’t mean that everything felt right. In a weird sense, it was almost like something had changed – shifted even. Maybe I was being selfish but I wasn’t sure I could handle much more of this drama.
Tears burned in my eyes as I thought everything over. While I was still grieving for Squishy and what could have been, it made me a little sad to think that Jacob and I hadn’t talked about it. Well, not properly and that’s what bothers me most. My pulled my knees up, my arms folded over my knees and my head dropped on to my arms as the sobs finally broke through again.
"Ness."
I jumped and snapped my head up - Dex was poking his head in the room.
"Are you alright?" He asked softly, bending down, his hand gently on my knee.
I sniffed, wiped my eyes and blushed a little. I wasn’t expecting this. "Y-yeah. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."
Dex set himself down beside me. "You didn't wake me," he said. "I can't sleep when I'm all hot and sticky."
I didn't trust my voice so I only nodded and wiped under my eyes again.
When Dex spoke again, his voice was quiet a soft, something I'd never expect from Dex. "What's the matter?"
"I-I." I sighed. "It’s nothing. I think I'm just tired."
"Uhuh. You know," he looked at me knowingly, "just between us, I think Jake has been...tired a lot too." He gave me a look.
"Really?" I asked, quietly.
"I shit you not."
"He..he hasn't said anything."
"He's a man, Ness. The only time you'll see him openly cry is if someone caught his dick and bollocks in a metal vice."
I gave something like a snort. "Yeah, that sounds about right."
"Heh." Dex smirked before turning all serious. "But my point is you're not the only one."
"He doesn't show it or talk to me.” I glanced down and thoroughly examined my fingers. “Sometimes, I just feel...alone."
"I don't think you are. When he first told me what had happened he could hardly finish his sentence. I've ever seen him so shook before, and that's quite something. He's a fire-fighter, some of the shit that's happened…that he’s seen, would fuck up normal people." Dex lowered his voice and glanced at me again. "He does love you, you know.”
Tears burned my eyes and I dropped my head down. “He shouted at me earlier. It was my own fault but…” I looked at Dex. “Things aren’t good at the moment.”
"You'll both get through this." He murmured, as I felt his arm wrapped around my shoulders and pull me closer for a sort of hug. “You’re both stressed. It happens.”
We sat in silence for a moment or two; I laid my head on his shoulder. It felt strange. I’ve never particularly been close with Dex; he seems too brash for my tastes, but I could see what it was that drove Jen wild about him – his soft side. Or his, apparently, big penis according to Jen.
“So…does he cry a lot then?” I asked, biting my lip.
“Ah, can’t say. We’re sensitive creatures, you know.” Dex chuckled. “All joking aside, I’ve only seen him cry twice and it was painful to watch.”
I nodded, unsure what to say. I didn’t want to push the subject any further. I sniffed as Dex shifted.
“Look, Ness.” Dex looked down at me. “Before I say this, just know, I do like you. I think you’re good for Jake.” I nervously swallowed and blinked at him as he continued on. “I’m only going to say this once… If things aren’t working out between you and Jake, then leave. Staying will only torture the both of you. Sometimes, we have to do things that we don’t want to do in order to make things better in the long run.”
As I looked at him, my head couldn’t wrap around what he was saying. Leave? Leave Jacob? It hasn’t got that bad, has it?
“But…” My voice was weak and pathetic. “But why would I leave him? I love him.”
He tilted his head to the side. “That doesn’t mean it’s right for you. Hell, I love drinking the left-over milk from my cereal but I can’t because it gives me a dodgy stomach. See what I’m saying?”
I nodded and grimaced at the same time. It appears I had a lot to think over.
I slowly opened my eyes – the light pouring in from the open curtains – and stifled a groan. It was far too early to be awake. My eyes were heavy and my body didn’t want to cooperate and move. I blinked a few times, and then glanced next to me. Jacob was asleep. His black thick hair was scruffy, his mouth slightly open as he softly breathed. His face was relaxed, peaceful. The sight almost nearly made me forget our rough argument. Almost.
Pushing the covers away from me, I crept out of the room and to the kitchen. I pulled out a cup and made myself a drink of water. I sighed when I felt it rush down my throat.
Closing my eyes, I still couldn’t quite believe what was happening. It was like it wasn’t us anymore. The fights…the snarky comments…what Dex had said. Then leave. It frightened me that the more I thought things over, the more of a solution it sounded. But I always quickly squash that thought – it’s a rough patch. Things aren’t that bad.
Yes, they are. No, I pushed that thought away.
I opened the balcony door and sat myself down around the white plastic table set. The birds were chirping, the breeze was cool and gentle and the sun was already starting to burn. I set my glass on the table and sighed; it was peaceful. And if I squinted hard enough, I could see the sea over the tops of the apartment buildings. I shut my eyes and rested my back on the back of the chair, exposing my legs to the sun, wanting to feel the light tingle.
“Ness?”
I fluttered my eyes open and glanced at the sliding doors. Jacob was leaning against the door frame with that furrowed brow.
“What?” I faced back towards the sea, watching a small white boat sail across.
“About last night-“
“Leave it, Jacob.” I replied coolly.
I heard him huff quickly. “Fine, be like that.”
I whipped my head around, getting myself ready for the on-set verbal match that’s likely to come. “I’m not being like anything! I just don’t want to start arguing again. Like we are now.”
Jacob pursed his lips and rubbed his cheek. “Yeah. Alright.” He gave me something like lazy shrug and headed back inside.
Huh, what was it? No screaming? I blinked at the empty space. Maybe…maybe today will be better.
I sat outside for most of the morning, my eyes either on the sea in the distant, or secretly looking through one apartment window directly across from us. It was the man that caught my eye – not obviously attractive but it was more his actions that made me curious to watch him. After he finished his cigarette on the balcony, his wife (I’m assuming) came out and wrapped her arms around his waist. They shared a long kiss before they headed inside together. They looked so in love.
“Oi, stink.”
I turned my head to find that Jennifer was leaning out the door frame.
“Do you want some scramble eggs?” She asked with a polite smile.
I shook my head. “No thanks.”
I watched her as she pulled a face and shrugged before leaving me alone. My eyes turned back to another balcony. This time, a woman was holding a baby in her arms as she bent down to speak to another child. There was no way I could understand what she was saying, but by the expression on her face – it was something soft and loving.
I felt a pang of jealously rise through me. I wanted that – children. But the thought was enough to make me shake and tremble. I couldn’t even idly wonder about having any more children just yet – the pain was too fresh.
I ran a hand through my hair and groaned. Urgh, nasty. I needed a shower to wash yesterday’s grime off me. I pushed myself up and headed back inside. Jacob and Dex were huddled around the table while Jen was standing by the counter, flicking through her phone.
“This…tastes a bit funny.” Jacob said slowly, taking a bite from the scrambled eggs.
“Huh, that’s odd.” Jen said casually. “The bottle said the poison was supposed to be tasteless.”
Jacob snapped his head up. “What?”
“What?”
I wiped my hand across my face, trying to keep a straight face as Jacob glanced back down at his place with an odd expression before slowly pushing it away from him.
“You know what? I’m not hungry anymore.”
Dex snorted after finishing his own mouthful. “She’s joking.”
“Am I?”
“What?” The smile fell off Dex’s face.
“What?” Jennifer replied, deadpan.
I cracked and started to giggle. Their faces, haha. Priceless. I walked past and headed in to the bedroom to grab a new bikini, shorts and wash bag for heading for the shower.
“Having a shower!” I called before I slammed the door shut behind me.
“Motherfuckingjesuschrist!” I yelped and jumped back. Fuck, the sand is hot. I winced and looked up; Jennifer had already beaten me to the sea. I let out a groan. Urh, I’m going to have to run. OK, one…two…three.
“Ahh, hot. Hot. Hot. Hot. Hot. Hot. Hot.” As soon as the sea is in reaching distance, I practically lunge in to the water, my feet instantly cooled. “Ahh, god.”
“Hah.” Jennifer chuckled. “I told you, it’s all about strategy. What you got to do is, find patches of shade to jump in to.”
“The only shaded bits are where other people’s umbrellas are up.” I jabbed my thumb behind me to the crowded sea front. “I don’t exactly what to be standing right over them.”
Jennifer snorted. “Why? I do. Besides, it keeps them on their toes if a stranger just pops out of nowhere.”
I let out a short laugh. “More likely to scare the shit out of them.”
“Yeah.” Jen cackled. “Let’s go further in.” She turned to me, her voice hushed. “I think I got sand up my vag.”
“I don’t even want to know how you managed that.” I shook my head with a smirk as we slowly pushed our way further in to the sea, the waves meeting our legs and breaking against us, splashing water everywhere.
“Ooock!” Jen flinched as a wave caught her in the face. “Eek. That did not taste good on the tongue.”
I laughed at her face, my mouth open just as another wave rocked over us, flying in to my mouth. I gagged.
“Hah!!” Jen snickered, pushing her hair back. “Serves you right, motherfucker.”
“Shut up and clean your vag.” I turned my back, face the shore, trying to get the taste of salt and just….erkkk from my mouth. We had stopped walking; the sea was now just level with our belly buttons.
“Ah, yeah.” Jen kind of dipped down in to the water. “Ah, there we go.” She glanced down in to the clear water. “I think I had most of the beach up there! Shit, where did that come from…”
I snorted. “Are you sure it didn’t get caught in the double lining thingy?”
Jen looked up. “Doubt lining? I thought it was a pocket.”
“What?” I asked. “Why would they put a pocket in the crotch of bikini bottoms?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. My Mum told me it for was holding snacks.”
I gave her an odd look. “No, she didn’t.”
“I swear to you, she did. She told me it’s where I put my packet of chewing gums.” Jennifer explained, dead serious.
“What? That doesn’t even make sense!” I howled with laughter. “Why would you put chewing gum right near your vag? Unless you’re trying to make it smell minty.”
Jennifer pursed her lips. “So it isn’t a pocket, then?”
“No.”
“Gah. I’ve been putting condoms in there when I go out and don’t have a purse! That woman is such a cunt. First she tells me the Ice-cream van music only plays when he’s run out of ice-cream, and then she told me that men have boys and women have girls – I actually believed that until I was like eleven.” She narrowed her eyes. “Then she steals my husband and I found that she lied to me about pantie pockets!” Jennifer shook her head, and I give a cough trying to hide my laughter. “You know, I bet she isn’t even my real Mum. It wouldn’t surprise me if she lied about that too.”
“You have the most dysfunctional relationship with your Mum, I have ever heard of.”
“Ah,” Jennifer pulled her lips in a tight line. “I’m better with my Dad. Speaking of rents; how are your Mum and Dad?”
I nodded, and rinsed my burning arms with the cool water. “Good. Mum’s being a little over bearing…but,” I shrugged. “She means well.”
“Yeah,” Jennifer splashed her hands in the water. “What about Jake’s Mum?”
I frowned. “She’s dead.”
“Oh, shit.”
“He doesn’t talk about her much.” I cocked my head to the side. “But, I guess Sue kind of acts like a mother to him.”
Jennifer pulled a face. “Have you made up with Jacob?”
“No. I honestly don’t know what’s happening. Friday we were fine. Yesterday, not fine.” I sighed. “He shouted at me last night. Full on. Called me a fucking idiot.”
Jennifer gasped. “What? Why?”
I pursed my lips. “Because I am. Well, last night I was, I think. I don’t know. I don’t remember too much but he doesn’t like it when I drink.” I explained, my fingers dipping in the sea.
“A lot of people use drinking as a coping mechanism.” Jennifer said. “It won’t last forever.”
I shrugged and reached up, pushing my hair behind my ears with my wet hand. “I don’t know. And then, Dex kind of made a good point last night.”
“What did he say?”
I blew out a breath and squinted down at Jen. “If it isn’t working then I should leave.”
“But it hasn’t got that bad.” Jen’s brow furrowed. “Has it?”
“I really don’t know. I can’t take the fighting anymore, though. That, I do know.”
“Maybe,” Jennifer licked her lips. “Maybe you just need a few days apart. Not actual breaking up, per say. Just…you know, time.”
“Maybe. I’m going back.” I held my hand up to my forehead, trying to block the sun from my eyes. “I’m turning in to a prune.”
Jennifer laughed and stood up properly. “Come on, then, shrimpy!”
Laughter and soft Spanish music filled the entire restaurant. And to some degree, it was nice. The ocean breeze swept past us as our table was on the invisible line between inside the restaurant and out on the open space in front.
We had already had our meals, despite the growing awkwardness between Jacob and I. Even though, he’s sitting right next to me, we don’t acknowledge each other. Well, not really.
I made a point of only having two glasses of wine, the rest water, but Jacob didn’t notice. He just muttered something under his breath as I picked up my first glass. I had a mind to tell him to fuck himself. But I kept that firmly to myself. No need to make a scene.
“Our flight is at seven in the evening tomorrow.” Jennifer said setting her glass on the table. “So, we could spend the morning at the beach then make a move about half three or so.”
“Sounds fine.” Jacob murmured in to his napkin.
I nodded, playing with the table cloth between my fingers. “Yup.”
Jacob looked at me, his eyes locking on to mine. My breath was caught by the sudden lump in my throat. He didn’t smile. Or frown. He’s face was completely neutral. It felt like he was looking straight past me.
He reached his hand over to mine, as it sat on my knee. I froze. Without thinking, as his hand took a hold of my fingers, I squirmed my hand out of his grasp and pulled back.
He frowned, his brow furrowing, as he watched my hand. His eyes flew back up my face, and then he pulled his lips in to a small sad smile before shifting in his chair and facing his body away.
Shit. What have I done? Fucking hell, I’ve just made this ten times worse. Feeling like the dick I am, I leaned forward slightly, my own hand reach out for him. But he caught my movement in the corner of his eye, and then he faced me and gave a sharp shake of his head.
Oh.
Retracting, I let my hand fall in my hand, feeling my eyes start to burn. Not here. Do not cry here, not in front of everybody.
“So, peeps.” Jen looked between us. “Wasn’t this a good idea?” She’s drunk. Completely off her face – like I was last night.
“No,” I mumbled to myself, my eyes on Jacob. “It was a mistake.” No one heard me. I took a deep breath, and grabbed my bag off the floor. “I’m going go back to the apartment.” I stood as everyone looked at me. “I’m not feeling too good. Too much sun. You all say here and enjoy yourselves.”
Dex pulled a face. “Are you sure?”
“Uhuh.” I nodded, not meeting anyone’s eyes. “See you later.”
As soon as my back was turned, I quickly ran my fingers under my eyes. Damn tears.
I didn’t head towards the apartment- I just went wherever my feet would take me. I soon found myself wondering on the beach. The stars twinkled in the sky as the sound of the waves crashing the beach eased me closer to the shore. Slipping my feet from my sandals, I took a step in to the water, shutting my eyes as I did.
My hair gently blew around my face from the ocean breeze. I smiled to myself. It was peaceful. And even for a single moment; I wasn’t consumed with thoughts of the mess Jacob and I have gotten us in to.
“Hmm, funny. I don’t remember having this inside the apartment.”
My eyes flew open. Jacob. Without turning around, I focused on one star as I spoke, “You followed me.” It wasn’t a question – more like a statement.
“Of course I did,” came his voice from behind. “You drank quite a bit, I couldn’t be sure you’d even make it back to the apartment. And by the looks of it, you didn’t.”
I took a deep breath as I listened to the sea around me. I chose not ignore that very obvious dig at me. “I’m a grown woman. I can go where I please.”
Although, I couldn’t see him, I knew he was hesitant with his next words. “Then act like one.”
Irritation suddenly ripped through me. It was go time. “Don’t speak to me like a piece of shit on your shoe, Jacob!”
“I’m not!” He practically yelled. “But you won’t listen to me any other way!”
A bitter laugh escaped from my lips. “You haven’t even tried!!” I whirled around, now breathing heavily. “You don’t even talk to me unless you’re making a snarky comment!”
“Don’t be silly,” he rolled his eyes. “That couldn’t be further from the truth.”
“Sure it is.” I said daringly as I turned back around to the sea. “You’ve barely spoken to me today.”
“You didn’t want me to. If I recall, you told me to leave it.” He snarled. “That’s exactly what I did!!”
“Because I’m not interested in fighting with you.” I snapped over my shoulder. “That’s all.”
“No one says you have to fight with me, Ness.”
“Argh,” I whirled around, my fists in to balls. “You do! You pick fights with me all the fucking time. If it isn’t over this then it’s that! I get that sometimes it’s my fault, I do but…” I swallowed. “I don’t need you to constantly start battles with me, Jacob. I’m sick of it.”
He was quite for a moment. “Yeah. Blame it all on me. Like you usually do.”
I sucked in a sharp breath and bit my lip to keep from screaming out in frustration. “Fine. Whatever. You’re right. I’m wrong.” I held up my hands as if I was surrendering before turning back around facing the sea and folding my arms. “I’d like it very much if you could please piss off.”
A couple of moments later, he sharply grabbed my right arm and yanked me back. He had obviously stormed in to the water, not caring about his shoes or the hem of his jeans. I protested but he didn’t listen. He pulled me close to him, his eyes scanning my face.
“You’re drunk.” His breath was hot against my skin. “I can smell it on you.”
I tried to get my arm free but his grip was tight. “Let go! I only had two fucking glasses.” My jaw clenched. “I’m not fucking drunk. Get off me!”
“No, you’re coming back to the apartment.” He ordered as he pulled me away from the water. He bent down and scooped up my scandals on the way as he tugged me up the beach. I tried to squirm myself from his hand, but I couldn’t. I even tried to slap his hand away but he just held on tighter.
“Let go!” I growled, and slapped his hand –hard. “Fucking let go of me now!”
“No!” He snarled back at me.
The complex was practically empty, just a few odd people here and there. As we reached the stairs to our apartment, his grip loosened slightly until when we got to the top of the balcony where he dropped my arm completely.
“Key. Now.” He barked as me.
I threw the key at him before I looked down at my arm. The skin was slightly red with a faint hand patch. I rubbed it absently as Jacob indicated for me to walk in first.
The front door slammed behind us just as Jacob’s voice echoed through the entire apartment. “I’m so angry with you!”
“With me?!” I snapped back as I turned around to face him. “You the one who physically dragged me back here! If anything, I’m the one who should be angry!” My hands were starting to shake. I can’t believe he just did that.
Jacob tossed the key on the kitchen counter. “Well, I’m sorry that I actually care about you! You think I want you waltzing around a foreign county at night pissed out of your fucking head?!”
“I’m not pissed.” I leaned forward, my voice low and forced.
“You’re always pissed,” he replied his jaw clenched. “It’s disgusting.”
“That’s a lie and you know it!”
“Is it really?” He asked sceptically, “Then fuck me sideways! I must be imagining all the wine bottles around the house back home!” He raised his hand face palmed himself.
“Argh!” I screamed, gritting my teeth. “You’re such a compulsive ARSE!” My voice got louder through each word. “If nothing goes your way or you don’t like it, you turn in to a fucking petty child!”
“Don’t turn this around on me!” He slammed his hand down on the kitchen counter. “We both know I’m not the problem here.”
“Oh?” I said, completely shocked, my eyebrows raised. “I’m a problem now? Thanks for letting me know, my fabulous BOYFRIEND! I don’t know how the fuck I manage to go on with you.”
Jacob blew out a breath before pinching the bridge of his nose, his voice tightly controlled. “That’s EXCATLY what I mean!” The hand on his nose flew out and smacked in to the counter again. “You make out that you’re the helpless victim all the time! That the entire world revolves around you, well newsflash, sweetheart, it doesn’t! And you’re fucking delusional to believe that it does!”
I shook my head at him as I sat down at the table. Slowly, I glanced back up at him, tightly controlling myself. “Yes. OK. I drink. But what do you do, Jacob? Do you ever try and help me? NO! No, you fucking don’t!”
“You want to talk about it? Fine!” Jacob exploded. “Let’s talk about it right now. How are you feeling, Ness?” He said, mockingly. “Stress a bit, tough for you? Shall I get you a glass of wine? Better yet, how about a bottle or two?!”
“You know,” I started in a calm voice. Which thoroughly shocked me, since I was absolutely fuming. “Sometimes, I wonder why I even got with you. You’ve turned in to a right horrible bastard lately.”
“No, I haven’t.” He said, narrowing his eyes. “I’m just sick to my stomach of watching you…..” he trailed off.
“Watching me what, Jacob?” I hissed. “Go on, say it. Fucking say it-“
Just as I finished my last sentence, Dex and Jennifer stumbled in giggling. As soon as they noticed the tension, the smiles were quickly wiped from their faces.
“Oh, sorry.” Jennifer mumbled. “We’ll, er, just…go. Good night.” She said pulling Dex by his hand to their bedroom.
Both Jacob and myself watched them as they left the room. Not one of us tried to fill the awkward silence that filled the atmosphere once the door was shut behind Jen and Dex. I just looked down at my hands. I couldn’t quite believe things had gotten that bad between us. I knew we were having problems but this….this just seemed so unfixable. So definite. A part of me couldn’t see us surviving this – then leave.
“I don’t want to fight with you.” Jacob voice was considerably lower and calmer than before. “But sometimes….” He sucked in a breath. “Sometimes you don’t see what’s really going on.”
I gritted my teeth together. “Like how everything is my fault?” I offered, looking up at him.
“Did I say everything was your fault?” He defended.
“You didn’t need to.” I jabbed a finger in his direction. “You imply it enough!”
“Fuck it,” he groaned. “Yeah, it is. You’re sudden need to drink is your fault. I’ve sat back and let you do it yourself but it has to stop. You’re behaviour has to stop!”
“Don’t tell me what I need to do.” I snapped. “I’m more than capable of making my own decisions.”
“No, you can’t. Not while we’re supposed to be together, a couple. But that’s the problem lately, everything is what YOU want! Every fucking thing, all the fucking time!" Jacob exploded, his voice filled with anger and hostilely.
"Oh god," I scoffed, "it’s about that again, isn’t it?" Squishy’s memorial.
Jacob snorted and gave a short laugh. "That? Yes, Ness. It's about 'that'."
"I didn't mean it like that." I told him angrily. "You know that."
"Do I?" He asked as though he didn’t believe me. "Do I? 'Cus the way I see it, you don't feel fuck all about it."
"How can you say that?" I spat. "Unlike you, I don't bloody need a marble slate to remember the baby that died!" I was now shouting. "I remember it perfectly well!! I should know, I fucking felt it."
"Oh, so I didn't feel it, then, no?" Jacob yelled back. "Sorry! I didn't know that the father doesn't get a say."
"Trust me, you will always get a say with the size of your fucking gob!"
"Yeah," Jacob ran his hand along the counter. "My gob. Well, I'd rather have a big gob then be a senseless fucking bitch!"
I swallowed. "Is that what you think of me?"
"What else am I meant to think?" He leaned forward over the counter. "It was our baby! OUR BABY! That's not something you just forget!" He yelled, throwing his hand in the air at me.
I met his anger with my own. I stood up and flung my arm in front of me, knocking over a mug.
"I KNOW!!! How did the blood feel, Jacob? How did it feel when on your fingertips on the bed? How did the surgery make you feel? How do the cramps make you feel? Huh? Oh yeah, that's right, you didn't feel it, did you!! I will never forget – ever! And don’t you dare stand there and tell me otherwise!”
“You think that gives you special merits?” Jacob scowled. “I hate to burst your bubble but I was there the whole time, holding your hand. Holding you as you cried and writhed in pain.” Jacob gave me a dark stare. “You weren’t the only one who lost a baby that night.”
“I never said I was, and you’re fucking out of order to imply that’s what I meant.” I managed through clenched teeth.
"Coulda fooled me."
"You know what?" I let out a curt laugh, unable to believe this was actually happening. How far we’ve fallen…
Then leave.
I rubbed my forehead with a shaky hand, preparing myself for what I was about to say. "I can't keep doing this with you. I can't have the same argument over and over with you. I physically can't do it anymore."
"What does the hell is that supposed to mean?" He was no longer shouting but his voice was still firm and cold.
"It can't do this anymore." I clarified, not looking at him in the eye.
His brow furrowed for a couple of moments before he spoke with an uneasy tone. "What do you mean?”
“This.”
“Us?”
"Yes." I whispered as I looked at the floor, my chest tight and my eyes becoming blurry.
He blinked at me, his own voice a little husky. “That’s it, then? We’re done?”
I couldn’t trust my voice – I gave a weak nod.
He let out a sharp puff of breath as he tapped the counter with his fist a few times. "Fine." Jacob spat as he headed to our bedroom door. But he didn’t go in. He rested a hand on the handle as he head fell forward. His voice was barely above a whisper. “What went wrong?”
“I’ve….we’ve lost what we used to be.” My own voice was shallow and raw.
He looked back. “Yeah…. I know.” His eyes dropped to the ground before he stepped in to the bedroom and slammed the door shut behind him.
I choked out a sob at his words. This whole night is enough to make my heart explode in my chest. I let my head fall forward in to the palms of my hands as my tears finally escape. It’s finally finished.
I sucked in a ragged breath as my chest contracted. There it is, the unbearable pain.
Then I pause; what have I done? I was so over whelmed by anger that I didn’t take a damn second to think things through.
I pushed myself up away from the table as I sniffed and whipped my eyes, heading for the bedroom.
My hand paused on the door handle.
No. I can’t. Sometimes, we have to do things that we don’t want to do in order to make things better in the long run. I love Jacob, I do. But we can’t keep this up. It’s the last thing we need; we both need time to heal from Squishy. We both need to think about the things we said.
I dropped my hand and headed for the balcony. I needed some fresh air…or to throw myself off it. Urh. I placed my arms against the railing with my head resting on them. I squeezed my eyes shut and took a couple of deep breaths, trying to fight the tears. If someone had told me that Jacob and I would have broken up three days ago, I would have called them a fucking liar.
I flinched at the sound of voices before a door slammed- hard.
I peeked over my shoulder, Jennifer and Dex’s door was open slightly, spilling light out. I squinted and focused on Dex carry something to a black suitcase before swiftly dropping it.
What?
I edged back in to the apartment, taking silent steps closer to the bedrooms.
“OK. Well, here’s some money in case you do.” That’s Jennifer’s voice.
“Thanks, babe.”
Money? What’s going on?
Deciding to be incredibly brave, or stupid, I opened our bedroom room. Jacob’s things were all gone – all placed on the bed. Along with his suitcase.
“What are you doing?” My eyes ran over him and his suitcase. It’s already nearly packed.
Jacob didn’t turn around. Instead, he just carefully put his wash bag neatly in to his case. “I’m leaving.”
“Leaving?” The word doesn’t sound right. My mouth became suddenly dry.
“Yes.” He zipped up his bag and turned around. “You’re right. We’re not good together anymore.”
I blinked a few times, slowly starting to feel something burning in the pit of my stomach. “Oh.”
Jacob grabbed a hold of the handle, yanked it off the bed and let out a shallow breath. I couldn’t help but notice his eyes are a little bloodshot, too.
“I’m going to head to the airport and see if I can get on an earlier plane. I can’t…be around you.” He looked away as he pushed past me.
I watched him as he walked to Jennifer and Dex’s room, poking his head inside. “Ready?” Jacob pulled back as Dex appeared, pulling his own suitcase.
“Yeah.” He turned back around to Jennifer. “Alright, love ya.” He gave her a peck and spun back around. His eyes found me. “See you later, Ness. Take care of yourself.”
Both of them headed for the door. Jacob didn’t turn around as he passed through the threshold. I winced as I heard the door shut behind them.
“Ness.” Jennifer gave me a sad smile.
“He’s….” my bottom lip quivered. “Actually…gone.” My voice broke as a new wave of tears washed over me.
Jennifer rushed forward and took me in her arms; I let my head fall on her shoulder.
“I know.” She gently rubbed my back, trying to soothe me from my hysterics. “Shh, I know.”
While AFF and its agents attempt to remove all illegal works from the site as quickly and thoroughly as possible, there is always the possibility that some submissions may be overlooked or dismissed in error. The AFF system includes a rigorous and complex abuse control system in order to prevent improper use of the AFF service, and we hope that its deployment indicates a good-faith effort to eliminate any illegal material on the site in a fair and unbiased manner. This abuse control system is run in accordance with the strict guidelines specified above.
All works displayed here, whether pictorial or literary, are the property of their owners and not Adult-FanFiction.org. Opinions stated in profiles of users may not reflect the opinions or views of Adult-FanFiction.org or any of its owners, agents, or related entities.
Website Domain ©2002-2017 by Apollo. PHP scripting, CSS style sheets, Database layout & Original artwork ©2005-2017 C. Kennington. Restructured Database & Forum skins ©2007-2017 J. Salva. Images, coding, and any other potentially liftable content may not be used without express written permission from their respective creator(s). Thank you for visiting!
Powered by Fiction Portal 2.0
Modifications © Manta2g, DemonGoddess
Site Owner - Apollo