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Beauty & Stupid	By : chi1986 Category: G through L > Hitchhikers Guide Series Views: 3415 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the Hitchhikers Guide series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 2
- 3
Title: Beauty & Stupid
Author: Chichan
Pairing: Zaphod/Ford
Disclaimer: They belong to the late DNA, not to me.
Rating: NC-17 overall, but this chapter is probably PG-13 at most.
Notes: None really. Any suggestions are really very helpful and always appreciated :). Sorry this chapter isn't very interesting.
Description: Zaphod was the one who decided to get drunk and then get horny. Zaphod was the one who initiated the sex. Zaphod was the one who said 'It's just fun'. Zaphod didn't really have any other motives. . . . did he? Second in a series.
-Verse: Any, I think. I'm leaning more toward movieverse (for some reason) though ^^;.

Chapter Three:
Night Meeting

"Sex is hardly ever just about sex."
~Shirley MacLaine

----

Ford had began to feel very well that day. He had managed to put thoughts of Zaphod out of his head (and consequently, the meeting planned for later that night) and his hangover had lessened considerably. He was feeling very well all the way until he reached the entrance to the bridge where he spotted Zaphod very close to Arthur.

Before Ford could be very jealous over the nearly nonexistent distance between the two, he heard very suspicious words like "Worn out" "Rough night" and instantly, his heart was racing and his feet were moving toward Arthur, who looked very bewildered.

"H-Hey, Arthur!"

Arthur turned, his face still pale and eyes wide. "Oh, Hello, Ford."

Ford shot a warning glare to Zaphod before settling himself beside Arthur. His mind raced for something to explain his interruption but it was very difficult considering the anger and very unwelcomed, senseless sense of shame welling up inside
But he did notice a cup from the Nutrimatic craddled in Arthur's hands, so he decided to go with that for lack of anything better.

"Ah, did you finally find tea?"

This caused Arthur to go into a rant about the Nutrimatic, how he failed yet again to make tea, and how this led to even more frustration, until Ford tuned him out.

". . . And that's it, Ford, I'm giving up," Arthur growled, tossing his hands into the air.

Of course no one really believed him. Zaphod, who had been leaning back, quite relaxed, stretched two of his arms over his head, a smirk crossing one of his heads.

"You left out the part where Tril had to hide all the objects you could have tossed at the machine," He said coolly before rising to his feet.

Arthur flushed as Ford glared once again as Zaphod began to walk away, once again pausing only to look over his shoulder.

"So, are you still coming by tonight?"

Ford gritted his teeth and looked away, suddenly feeling that he would really like to give his semi-cousin a nice punch in the face, but figured that wasn't a very smart move since Arthur was staring at him with a questioning look.

"What is he talking about, Ford?"

Ford forced a grin that had Arthur unconcsioucly pulling his robe tighter until it was safely guarding his neck. "Nothing."

Ford had hoped that the day would get better because, quite simply, that was the only thing he could do, but it didn't seem to work for him in the slightest. Zaphod kept dropping suggestive hints that left Arthur questioning and Ford's anger simply grew.

He finally ended up grabbing a confused Arthur and led him away to another part of the ship—which just happened to be his bedroom.

Arthur whined, struggled against Ford's arm, gave up and finally looked away the room. "Ford, why did you bring me here?"

Ford shrugged and plopped down onto his bed. Arthur awkwardly joined him. Awkward silence followed, which gave Ford the time to think of Zaphod's actions and wonder vaguely if his semi-cousin consciously knew he was going against what he had promised. Maybe he thought he was being cute.

Arthur, on the other hand, seemed to be staring blankly at the floor. His eyes were unfocused, puffy from sleep-deprivation. Ford frowned, before reaching over to pat him on the shoulder in what he hoped was a reassuring way.

Arthur just sighed. "Hey, Ford?"

"Yes, Arthur?"

Arthur hesitated. "Did I ever do anything to you?"

Ford gave him a strange look. "What do you mean?"

Arthur shrugged. It would be a very long while before he would admit to what he was thinking, so Ford was ultimately left to blame Zaphod for saying something.

"Oh, it's nothing. I think I'll go and have a rest now."

Arthur moved wearily toward the door, his shoulders sagging. He couldn't bring himself to really say anything to Ford, but he knew his friend must have felt it. Must have sensed something. Though as emotionally daft as he had come across recently, Arthur had to really work to convince himself of that

He didn't hear Ford calling him, nor did he hear the footsteps following him to the door. He was too lost inside. It had started out as an all right day. He had woke up, tears drying on his face as usual, laid in bed thinking about his house—his family—earth. Everything that he no longer had, but he had forced himself out of bed and to the bridge at a reasonable hour today, he had been greeted rather cheerfully by Trillian, but then Zaphod had had to come on the bridge.

He had been talking about the previous night and how Ford had been worn out by him. Arthur had decided that he didn't want to know how. It wasn't any of his business.
Besides all that, Ford had seemed to put quite a distance between them, so Arthur really didn't see a reason he should care. Or rather, that is what he convinced himself of.

He had the nagging suspicion that Ford was doing all this as some form of twisted revenge. Perhaps he had done something to him on earth and that was the reason he was forced out into a galaxy he felt he didn't really belong in at all.

Maybe he was just generally bitter toward all humans and wanted to bring one along to show them how it felt to be away from one's home along as he had. But the difference was, Arthur could never go back home. He was stuck in space, with a man from somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse that always seemed to be rather annoyed by him.

These thoughts occupied Arthur all the way to his room and before he knew it, he was settled back on his bed, preparing for a nap that wouldn't come. Him going to his room usually meant it was time for him to stare blankly at the ceiling while he waited for something to click and everything to make sense again. It never did.

Especially when Ford was on his mind like this. He still cared for his friend. Arthur felt it wasn't entirely fair. He should be allowed to hate now, shouldn't he? But instead, he was clinging to the man who drug him away from his home like some pathetic, lost puppy.

Albeit, an abused (as he saw it) puppy, but a puppu none the less. He quickly discarded those thoughts and settled for his usual lost feeling where he could safely sit and wonder what his purpose was now.

While Arthur was losing himself to his feelings of helplessness, Ford was left to pace back and forth in his room, cursing Zaphod, and still going over the misunderstanding of his friend's words.

He wondered (rather hopefully) if it was jealousy Arthur was hinting at. That would certainly be very good. After a spark of hope, Ford decided against that feeling for now and settled for all the things he would say to his semi-cousin if he decided to go visit him in his room tonight.

And then he thought of a way to let Arthur know that nothing was truly going on between Zaphod and himself without being too obvious since he wasn't entirely sure that is what his friend was angry about now.

And while *that* was going, Zaphod was still lounging on the bridge. Zaphod had entirely missed any drama, save for the annoyance Ford had shown when he was innocently (in his opinion anyway) teasing the earthman.

He was planning on what activities would take place upon Ford's arrival that night. He thought he would pounce on him the minute he came in the room and maybe suck him off before he got into anything real. He decided he would get Ford nice and drunk—drunker than the previous night so that he would be more cooperative.

A tiny part in the back of his minds was chastising him on his actions, but he rarely listened to that part anyway. He had decided long ago that that part was uncool and thus not very fun, so it deserved to be ignored by the more fun, cooler sides of himself. And bullied on occasion.

Mainly, it's problems were the fact that he was fucking his semi-cousin and enjoying it immensely and also not really caring how said semi-cousin felt about the situation. Zaphod was relatively sure he enjoyed it, too, since he always ended up giving in, but he knew if Ford had the choice, then he wouldn't want to continue.

That is the reason, Zaphod decided, that he wouldn't willingly give Ford the option of choosing just yet. He needed something to entertain himself until they reached one of the wilder planets. He only had Trillian and while that was very entertaining in itself, he had always felt a certain curiosity about Ford.

He had pushed it out of his time and again, especially when they were younger. When they were much younger than that even, Zaphod had found Ford to be very annoying, always tagging along for an adventure, until one day, he looked at him, noticed he was becoming older, his body was actually pretty nice, and so was his face, then decided he wanted him.

He smirked. If Ford ever knew how many times Zaphod resisted the urge to actually do this, which was very good seeing as how Zaphod was very bad at denying his desires, he would probably die of shock (which was a very serious problem in some parts of the galaxy).

Zaphod's mind wandered back to more inviting images and thoughts. Mainly consisting of Ford in very interesting positions and all begging for release.

Later that night, Ford was thinking similar things, but mainly with Zaphod doing most of the begging. He moved anxiously down the halls, carefully trying to avoid being caught by anyone and silently cursing the doors.

His anger flashed as he remembered that infuriating grin on his semi-cousin's face as he let another insinuation drop and Arthur's questioning face as Ford forced a puzzled look on his. He decided Zaphod would pay for that at the very least.

Once he reached Zaphod's room, he found him relaxing on the bed, two Pan Galactic Gargleblasters in hand. Ford's eyes narrowed.

"What are you on about, Zaphod? Are you trying to ruin things for me with Arthur?" He spat, not bothering to hide any venom as he moved in. He hadn't really meant that to be the first thing out of his mouth, but that was how it turned out and he didn't really care.

"No, baby. Relax... I was just having a bit of fun." Zaphod shrugged carelessly.

Ford's eyes narrowed. "Fun? Fun! Did you even once stop to think that you could have ruined everything for me with those words?"

Zaphod shrugged, put the Pan Galactic Gargleblasters away, and sauntered over to Ford just as carelessly as ever. "I wasn't going to tell him anyway, besides, man, what's the loss if you lose the monkeyman anyway?"

Ford's eyes narrowed even more. "It would be a very big loss, Zaphod. Very big."

Zaphod seemed a bit taken aback by those words. Actually, he was. He hadn't really thought Ford had cared that deeply about the earthman since his semi-cousin had never been known to stay in a relationship for more than a couple weeks and that was considered a very serious, very rare one at that.

Zaphod tried his best to look apologetic. "Okay, man, I'm sorry."

Ford sighed, not really feeling up to an argument and knowing full and well it was pointless with Zaphod since he could be very stubborn in these sorts of situations. He contemplated leaving, but decided it felt good to be with someone else. He had barely got the chance to be with anyone on Earth and Arthur still denied his advances.

So he decided, for now, he would leave his anger to sulk in some far corner and enjoy some pleasure while he could still get it.
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Beauty & Stupid