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Trapped	By : LovingPipersBoys Category: Twilight Series > Slash > Edward/Jacob Views: 12126 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or make any money from this story.

Chapter List
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Trapped
Three months later…
My days have been filled with a lot of ups and downs since the day of my kidnapping, the day that the people in my world had royally fucked me over. However, I'm doing ok, considering all of the torment that I have been put through and now things have taken a fairly odd turn.
Edward and I have gotten closer. I've opened up to him more and he has done the same in return. I would still rather not have him touch me but if I stay calm and give into what he wants he doesn't hurt me. Sometimes the way he touches me manages to make me feel good, special even. I know that I shouldn't think this way but I can't help it. I'm here with him now and he's a part of me. There is nothing outside of these walls for me, I have no where else to go. Edward was all that I had now, no matter how screwed up it was.
Maybe that was the reason for my obedience and contentment.
It's obvious that I'm not welcomed back at the reservation any more and even if I were, I had no place there, no purpose. Hell, I didn't even have family there any more. I found out that my father had taken his part of the money and got a place near my sister. Edward had shared this information with me and my heart sank. He had actually abandoned me. I felt so sick that I threw up and cried for almost three hours as Edward held me in his arms told me that everything was going to be alright. That I had a new family now, one with him and they would never betray me. I found comfort in this, it's what I hold onto every single day.
I should hate him and his family but I don't. Like I said, they're all I have now and at least that's something.
After all, who wants to be alone?
A month after my birthday I got to ride my motor cycle, with Edward of course, but it felt good to be outside again. I never realized how badly my inner wolf had missed the smell of the earth, the sound of the wind and the brush of a cool breeze against my face. It was amazing. One day we had lunch down by the riverside. When I was done eating I laid down on the blanket, closed my eyes and listened to the sound of the river crashing against the rocks. Edward laid down next to me, placed my head on his chest and played in my hair, something that always managed to put me to sleep.
The smell of him had become familiar to me and something that I welcomed without complaint or repulsion. Funny how quickly things change. I reflect on the days before as I wait for him to come home from a hunting trip. I was happy to have gotten in a workout in the Cullen's fully equipped gym after being restained for so long and now, after a long hot shower, I find myself laying on our bed, looking up at the ceiling, my mind wondering in a million different directions.
A knock on the door interrupts my thoughts.
"Come in." I shout.
"Hello there handsome. Up for some company?"
I cringe, let out a heavy sigh and turn my head in the direction of the voice.
"What do you want Emmett?"
He smiles at me and I can't help but wonder what lead me to ask such a stupid question.
"Well at first I wanted to check up on you after our little intense work out. You know, just to make sure that I didn't break you. Secondly, I think we both know the other something is that I want. I still remember what you taste like Jacob, so sweet and tempting. It's no wonder why Edward wants to keep you all to himself. You're irrespirable." He says as he licks his lips at me.
An evil smirk spreads across his lips as he shuts the door behind him and walks towards the bed.
I back up on instinct.
Things were going so good with Edward. He was finally over his jealousy of Emmett and was treating me like a human being. He cared for me and I didn't want to lose that, not after everything I've been through. I didn't want to go back to the way things were, the beatings, the rapes were a thing of the past and if Emmett got any closer we were both going to suffer the wrath of Edward.
Whether I wanted him to touch me or not would be irrelevant. When it came to Emmett, Edward's logic went out the window along with his sanity. He hated Emmett for what took place my first night here and although he's gotten over it, he hasn't forgotten about it.
At all.
"You should be less concerned with my fitness level, which is pretty high by the way, and more concerned with what your brother is going to do to you if he gets a whiff of your scent in our bedroom. So please save us both a whole lot of trouble and get out Emmett. Please." I say gripping the towel around my waist.
I really should have put some clothes on.
"Oh come on Jakey. Don't you like me? Didn't you enjoy our first time together?"
I swallow hard. I back up until I made contact with the head board.
"You do mean our first and last time, don't you? And no, actually I didn't. Now please, get the fuck out of my room Emmett. Now!"
The bastard had the nerve to laugh as he approached me. His eyes fixed on my exposed skin, making me tremble beneath the weight of his stare.
"Are you trying to get us both killed? If Edward comes back and sees you in here with me you know that things are going to get real ugly, real fast, and I will suffer more than you so please Emmett, for the last time, get out of here."
He says nothing as he advances on me, straddling my hips. I panic and shove him off roughly as I stand from the bed and head towards the bathroom, hoping to lock myself in until Edward returned home, but Emmett was too quick. Slamming me up against the wall and kissing me forcefully on the lips, I tried hard to fight him off and I manage to move him quite a few times but he kept coming back. My heart was beating a thousand miles per minute as I struggled to keep a firm hold on my towel just as the door flew open, my worst nightmare coming to life.
Emmett looked me in the eyes and smiled before turning to face him.
"Hello brother. Did you enjoy your hunting trip? I know I did."
Within seconds Edward had taken hold of Emmett and threw he clear across the room and out of the window on the other side, not missing a beat as he leaped down after him.
I stood there, frozen, unable to do anything but pray for my own ass.
God please don't let him be angry with me.
He had to know that I wanted nothing to do with Emmett. He just had to.
I could hear arguing from downstairs as Carlisle, Esme and Alice try to break up the fight. I hear Edward's voice give out a clear warning to Emmett and anyone else who was daring enough to try what he had.
I knew that voice. Edward was pissed.
Moments later Edward storms into the room and slams the door shut behind him, breathing heavy and filled with rage. He turns to me, his eyes as black as midnight, his fist clenched in anger and…pain.
Slowly he walks over to me and places his hands on either side of my head. There is less then an inch between us and I'm scared as hell, trapped with no place to go.
"How could you do this to me?"
"Edward I…"
"I TRUSTED YOU! How could you do this to me? Don't you know how much I love you?"
He screams at me and punches the wall behind me.
"I didn't want him to touch me Edward, I swear! I told him to leave and he wouldn't. I would never betray you Edward, ever!"
He stares at me for a moment before kissing me hard on the lips. I don't fight him, right now I wouldn't dare try. I kiss him back, needing him to believe me. I place my hand behind his head and pull him further into me. My lungs are burning as his arms circle around my waist, holding me tight.
Suddenly I was pushed hard against the wall, Edward's right hand connecting with my face so hard that I can taste blood seeping out of the corner of my mouth. It's followed by a punch to the ribs so hard that I heard them snap like a twigs. A knee to my stomach finishes me off, knocking the wind out of me. I slide down the wall and look up at Edward, tears blurring my vision.
Damn it we were doing so good.
Why did this have to happen?
"I'm so sorry Jake. I could taste him on you and I lost my temper. But don't worry love, I'll get Carlisle to take care of you. When you're better I will make it up to you. I promise."
I try to talk but I can't, the pain is too great. Edward leaves me for a moment only to return with his father in tow. They place me on the bed as Carlisle breaks and resets my ribs, the pain paralyzing me as I scream loud enough to reach the next state.
Edward held my hand and I can hear him repeating over and over again how sorry he was and that this will never happen again.
I don't give a shit about anything he's saying.
I hated him and needed him at the same time.
This was beyond crazy.
This was beyond fucked up but I don't care. I just wanted him to hold me and tell me that everything was going to be alright just as he did on the night that I learned of my father's new life.
Carlisle injects me with something that makes me feel as if I were floating. It took my pain away almost instantly and I watched him leave the room as Edward laid next to me, his face sad and guilt ridden.
He places my head on his shoulder and wraps his arms around me.
"I love you so much Jake and I'm so sorry for the pain that I've caused you. We were making such good progress and I just had to fuck it all up but don't worry, it will never happen again. We'll get back on track tomorrow and everything's going to be fine. We'll get though this."
That was the last thing I heard before drifting off to sleep.
When I woke up Edward was sitting on the side of the bed next to me. His face twisted in torment as he looked down at me.
"Edward, what's going on?" I questioned groggily.
My body was still sore but I was able to take deep breaths which was good but the look on Edward's face worried me.
"Being an immortal can have it's advantages. You get to witness so much first hand and it's an experience that no history book in the world can give you. I guess you can say that it's a blessing and a curse." He smiled more to himself than at me as he continued. "Having that special someone to share everything with is one of the most important things about being a vampire. If you have no one you can go insane, just as some humans do when there is no one to share their world with. I've been alone for so long Jacob and when I saw you for the first time I knew that you were the one for me. You're so perfect, you're everything that I've always wanted, everything that I've dreamt of having in my screwed up world. You were going to be the one thing that kept me sane, that kept me from becoming a full on monster. You were to be the one person in the world that gave me a reason to continue being what I am and face another day. I wanted to share everything with you but I don't want this to be a one sided love, I want you to love me, to want me, for me to be the center of your world but I don't want it like this. I never wanted to force you, it just happened that way. My hunger for you, my lust, my desire drove me to depravity and to do things that one should never do to the person that they love."
I don't know what to say as he looks away. I'm shocked to see blood running down his face in the place of tears.
I never knew that vampires cried blood and the sight was scary. I look towards the door and I see three bags packed and ready to go. As I glanced around the room I saw that a lot of my stuff was missing. At that point my heart leapt into my throat.
Was he going to let me go?
I held my breath and waited for him to continue.
"Now it would appear as if I'm the one who doesn't deserve you. I hurt you so many times but I won't allow myself to do it any more. I love you too much but it's just enough to let you go."
I couldn't believe this.
I just stared back at him as he looked around the room at anything but me. I could tell that this decision was tarring him apart. He was prepared to live his life without his true mate, without me.
I should have been jumping for joy but somehow I couldn't. I didn't want to see him hurting like this. I wanted to stay with him. I wanted to listen to his strange music without words, I wanted to play the piano by his side I wanted to lay next to him every night for the rest of my life.
He was there for me when everyone else had so easily turned their backs on me. Was he the reason for my pain? Yes, but in the end my own people had wronged me. At least he cared for me, loved me even.
That wasn't such a bad thing.
Was it?
Maybe I was just as crazy as he was or maybe this whole situation had mind fucked me into believing that what I was feeling for him was love and that he was the only person in the whole world that I could count on. The one person that would kiss away my tears whether he was the cause of them or not. The one person that wanted me and loved me enough to stick around.
Suddenly he looked down at me, his face a mixture of happiness and confusion.
I almost forgot that he could read minds.
"Do you really mean that Jacob? Do you want to stay here with me?" His eyes were bright and full of hope.
I take a moment to think about everything. Not sure how to answer him.
My hesitation brought that sad look back to his face. I hated seeing it there. It just seemed so wrong and out of place.
God I'm so damaged.
"I think that I should go. I need a while to figure things out for myself. I need to make sure that I really want this because of me and not because you're all that I have. Do you understand?"
Edward nods in understanding.
"You don't love me and that's ok, you don't have to feel guilty about it at all Jacob. I should never have forced you into this. Just promise me that you'll be happy. No matter where you go or what you do. Can you promise me that?"
I don't understand why but I start to tear up, pain consumes me and I try so hard not cry. I try to gather myself as I look up into his eyes I could see the heartache there. I'm surprised that it's hurting me just as much. I take his hand in mine smile at him.
"I promise Edward. Like I said, I just want a chance to see if this is what I want. You never know I may come back to you one day."
"Yeah, sure you will." He smiled sadly and my heart sinks. "I've packed most of your things. When you get to your destination Alice will send you the rest, including your motor cycle."
Suddenly, a strange feeling came over me prompting me to speak up. My voice full of concern.
"Why can't you bring it to me? It would give us a chance to see each other away from here."
He sighs before turning to me.
"Because I won't be here Jake. I'm leaving."
"Where are you going?"
"That doesn't matter right now. All that matters is seeing you off before I go. Carlisle has brought you a SUV as a going away gift and he's opened up a bank account for you to make sure that you will always be well taken care of as a gift to me."
"But I don't understand Edward. Where are you going?"
A wave of uneasiness washes over me and I can't shake the feeling that something more is going on.
"Don't worry about me Jacob. I won't come looking for you or try to drag you back into a life of hell with me. You'll be safe. You'll be free."
I raise an eyebrow and tilt my head. Something was horroribly wrong here.
"Edward…"
He puts a finger to my lips to silence me before replacing his finger with his lips.
I lean into the kiss that ends a little sooner then what I would have liked. Edward stands and tosses some clothes my way to put on.
"When you're done getting dressed meet me in the living room." He says without looking at me.
The throbbing pain in my chest returns. I dress quickly as Edward disappears with my bags. I still feel uneasy about the situation but I try to push those thoughts into the back of my mind and bury them. After heading to the bathroom I wash my face, grab my jacket and head downstairs.
Everyone is gathered in the living room looking sad, all except for Rosalie who glares at me. At one point we were friends and now for some reason she hated me.
Was it because I was leaving?
Edward was trying to do the right thing by me and her husband was obessesed with me so wouldn't she be happy that I was leaving?
There had to be more to this than what I was getting from Edward. Maybe once I was settled I would give him a call to find out what was really going on.
The man in question was leaning up against the door with the same crushed look on his face. I wanted to tell him that this was not the end of the world that we would see each other again but Carlisle's voice broke the silence in the room before I could.
"We will miss you Jacob and I'm sorry things had to turn out the way that they did. We went about this the wrong way and I hope that you will be able to forgive us in the future."
I could do nothing but nod my head at his words as he wrapped his arms around me and gave me a farewell hug.
Emmett only shook my hand and I couldn't help but notice how his entire demeanor had changed. I could tell that something serious was on his mind and it had little to do with me. He was hurting, just as they all were and I wished that someone would let me in on the big secret.
Alice and Esme were next. Alice slipped something into the pocket of my jacket and gave me a look that told me not to say a word about it and I didn't. Maybe she knew exactly what was going on with Edward and this was her way of letting me know the real deal.
I said good bye to everyone and Edward walked me to my SUV. It was a nice brand new black BMW. I could see a box filled to the top with food, that I was sure Alice and Esme had packed, laying in the front seat.
"Well I guess this is good bye Jake." Edward said looking down at the ground.
"For now." I spoke softly, not trusting myself to speak any louder.
"No forever."
I study him for a second.
"Edward please. I said that I would think it over so stop with the forever talk. You hurt me and kidnapped me and the fact that I would even entertain the thought of talking to you again should tell you something."
He smiles at me in a way that said "I know something you don't know."
I didn't like it, not one bit.
"Listen, I'll call you when I get to a hotel."
His head snapped up for a second.
"No, don't. Call Alice. As I said, I will be going away."
"Going where Edward. You still haven't answered me."
"Some place where I can never hurt you again."
Now I'm getting angry.
"Will you please cut the cryptic crap and tell me exactly what's going on."
He only manages to give me a broken smile before kissing me on the cheek and opening the car door.
"Good bye Jacob."
I say nothing as I slide into the drivers seat and start the engine.
Edward walks backwards towards the edge of the woods before disappearing in a blur.
I drive off and I can see Jasper and Alice in my rear view mirror before they take off after him.
Something about this just wasn't right.
Eight long hours later I'm dead tired and decide to stop at the Days Inn hotel somewhere in California.
The nightmare that had lasted almost five months was over and I was free. Part of me missed Edward and true to my promise I called him, not Alice as he had suggested. The phone went straight to voice mail and something in me panicked. After three more attempts to reach him I dial Alice's number.
She answers on the third ring.
"Hello."
Her voice was low and shaken and there was the sound of an engine revving in the background.
"Alice it's me, Jacob. I just wanted to let you guys know that I made it to a hotel and that I was alright. Umm, do you know where Edward is? He's not answering his phone."
"He's on a plane Jacob."
"Where did he go."
There was a slight pause and it sounded as if she was crying.
"Read my note Jacob and if you care about him, you'll meet me at LAX in half an hour. If not, then don't worry about it and do not feel guilty. I know that you were hurt by him and what he did to you and how he beat and raped you so I wouldn't blame you if you didn't give a shit and chose not to show up but if you have even the slightest bit of love for him, you'll meet me there. I have to go. The choice is yours."
Before I could answer the phone went dead. Frantic I reached into my pocket and pulled out the note, unfolding the paper in order to read it. Shock engulfed me and tears slid down my face as I read each and every single word.
Dear Jacob,
Edward begged me not to tell you this but I love my brother too much to lose him. He felt guilty about everything that he's put you through and has decided that letting you go was for the best. We were all with him on this decision and because of my visions I knew that you would one day return to him and the two of you would build a relationship together on your terms, the way it should have been done to begin with. But Edward didn't see it that way.
He felt that I was lying to keep him from doing exactly what I knew that he would do. There is an order Jacob, called the Valturi. They are vampire royalty and they are the officials of our kind. They set the rules for us and we are to follow them or suffer the consequences which almost always result in death. One of our most sacred rules is that we are to never expose ourselves to the world or let humans know of our existence. If we are reckless enough to do so then we are put to death. Edward is going to expose what he truly is to the mortal world by walking into the sun and allowing them to see his skin sparkle in an inhuman way. This is an act of suicide Jake. He loves you so much that he can't live in a world without you. He thinks that you hate him and maybe you do but I am begging you that if you have even the slightest bit of love for him then you need to help me stop him. I know that you have no reason to help me but without you saving him will be impossible. Emmett has even agreed to leave you alone if you can save Edward. He saw how close the two of you were becoming and he feels responsible for this. Please Jacob, you have to help us. I hate to put you in suck a messed up position but please, save my brother. Please.
Love, Alice.
I let the paper fall to the ground. My head was at war with my heart as I looked between my keys and the door. I had passed the sign for LAX and I knew that I was about twenty minutes from the airport but my feet would not move.
My heart wanted this.
My brain called my heart all kinds of fucked up names.
Should I do this?
Should I save him?
He had hurt me so bad. He had stripped me of my life, my pride, my friends, my family, everything! Maybe I should let him die. Maybe he deserved it. But my heart knew that I would also be damning myself if I let that happen.
Shit why did this have to be so complicated?
It should be simple. Let the bastard die and take his hold on me to the grave with him.
But it wasn't that simple.
It wasn't that easy.
A part of me had grown to care for him. A part of me needed him in order to understand more about myself.
Why was this happening to me?
Why did I have to care about my rapist?
How fucking sick was I?
I stood from the bed and put my jacket on. I snatched the keys from the desk as my heart continues it's tug of war with my head. My eyes are flooded with all of the painful memories it held. Just when I think that my decision has been made I see imagines of happier times with Edward. I'm reminded of his smile and his acts of kindness and the way that he took care of me and taught me new things. In the end I believe that he truly did care about me and a lot of what he said about my former friends and family made sense to me.
Damn this was hard.
But deep down I knew what I had to do.
And with a click of heavy metal my decision was set in stone and there would be no turning back.
I was on a highway to hell but I wasn't sorry about it. Not one damn bit.
You can say that I'm trapped but in my mind I'm happy and as free as a fucking bird.
A/N: I know you're all wondering just what the hell is going on. Lol. But I decided to leave it up to you guys, the readers, if the sound of the metal was Jacob opening the door to meet Alice at the airport or if it was the sound of him throwing the keys back down on the desk. I hope that you've enjoyed the story as much as I have enjoyed writing it. Thanks for reading now click the damn review button already! Lol
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Trapped