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Cowardice	By : saucyminion Category: G through L > Lord of the Flies Views: 17461 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Flies, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
Part 8 – Secret Spines

    Ralph had been told that the meeting in the back office was to be a conversation: not an interview. Ralph wasn’t sure which he would prefer, and he couldn’t tell yet what exactly this meeting was. He sat alone in a small, windowless office—or if there was a window it would have been impossible to tell because nearly floor to ceiling on every side of him were stacks of books, papers, and folders.
    The door opened and in ducked Jack. “I’m sorry about the wait,” he said.
    “It’s all right,” said Ralph. He felt a little like he was at an appointment with his doctor. Doctors always kept him waiting. Jack had been away for a moment because, as had told him before, he needed to retrieve the proper paperwork. “But I can tell you now that if working here means sorting out all of this… stuff, I may not be the man for the job.”
    Jack offered a smile and sat at the small desk beside Ralph. “No, don’t think on it. These are all damaged,” he gestured to the stack at the right of him, “And these are simply receipts and inventory records, and these just part of my personal collection, and those there… well. You’re not interested in all of this. Shall we just get started then?”
    Ralph tried not to be intimidated by the mount of reading that Jack obviously did. He was trying to read the spines of some of the novels in Jack’s “personal collection” stack when he responded with, “I thought you said this was supposed to be just… a conversation?” After he decided that none of the titles on the spines were visible to him, he finally turned his gaze to Jack and wondered for the tenth time how on earth he had wound up where he was.
    Jack sighed with a seemingly forced smile and cast his gaze downward. “Look…” he said, flattening out Ralph’s application form on the desk. “This is just as peculiar as it is unexpected.”
    Ralph watched Jack’s fingers tracing the edges of the form on the desk. “You’re telling me.”
    “Yes, well… then, you see…” Jack was obviously uncomfortable, though he tried to speak slowly and with confidence. “I don’t exactly know how to go about this. It has been a very strange day.”
    Ralph didn’t doubt that Jack was as uneasy as he was, but it gave him comfort to hear him express it. If Jack really weren’t bothered or anxious about their meeting together, it would have made Ralph feel incredibly pathetic.
    “Yes. Very strange.”
    There was a long pause. Ralph thought that perhaps it would be best that he not take the job. But his stomach ached from hunger and he knew he needed to gain an income soon—very soon. In fact, he felt a grumble coming from his stomach and tried to think of something to say quickly to cover it. Fortunately, Jack spoke.
    “Normally I’d be advised against hiring someone I have such a… strong history with…”
    Strong history seemed to be a very ambiguous choice of words. “If you feel it would be best that I leave…” He wasn’t sure if he felt relieved that he could get away, or terrified that he would have to leave without a job: without a lot of things he needed.     “No, not at all. Please, excuse me for being so rude… I’m just not certain where to start. I cannot seem to make this as formal as I normally would like to.” Jack finally lifted his head to look at Ralph. A moment of wordless focal contact was clearly unsettling to him, and Jack picked up a pair of square spectacles, placing them on his face. They certainly made him look scholarly as he pretended to read over Ralph’s application. “I would like to hire you. I would like to very much…”
    Ralph was more interested than disappointed when he heard the underlying note of contradiction in Jack’s voice. “But…?”
    Jack sighed and leaned foreword. “Ralph. Honestly, do you feel comfortable being hired by me? Can you really see yourself working for me? With me? Do you feel like it’s fair?” He took off his classes again and put them on the table, staring at them. All of the sudden his face looked open and vulnerable.
    Fair? Ralph’s stomach sank. “Do you mean to say that the credentials I listed for you are insufficient?” They probably were insufficient.
    Jack knew that Ralph understood what he was saying and this time when he spoke he leaned foreword. “Ralph. Honest. You know what I mean, so don’t be stubborn. Your application is fine. I would like to hire you. I just don’t want you to think that somehow… it’s a way of putting myself… above you.” He shrank back a little at this last statement, which was spoken quietly and carefully.
    In a moment of panic and disarray, Ralph’s brain mistook “above you” for “on top of you” and even though it made no sense in context—of anything at all—he felt his face burning. He wanted to slap himself and scream, “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?” and beat his fists against his forehead for all of the thoughts that had been creeping through his mind since tea. The fact was that the idea of Jack putting himself above, or on top of Ralph was not in the least bit concerning to him.
    Now was not the time for a mental break down.
    “No,” Ralph finally said, his blood pumping loudly in his ears. He tried to remember what it was he was objecting to. “No, I know you are not trying to get on top of me—ABOVE, me, you aren’t trying to place yourself… above me. At all. By this. By hiring me…” Ralph squeezed his eyes shut and wiped the back of his hand across his brow. “Not that you have hired me, yet, while ‘yet’ is a little presumptuous, I know… but no. The answer is no, I don’t think that you are trying to act as a superior individual over me, personally. I’m the one who came here. I’m the one who came to you.”
    When Ralph opened his eyes, he saw that the expression on Jack’s face was something of concerned amusement, and something bewildered.
    Ralph was certain that Jack was going to ask him if—no, tell him he was mad, but instead he asked:
    “Are you available to start your training soon?”
    He nodded. “Yes. Today. Now, even.” If Jack was going to hire him, he could see no reason why.
    “Then,” he said, “I would like for you to work with me here.”
    With? He said ‘with’, not ‘for’. Ralph was glad.
    Wait…
    Jack was hiring him. He was actually going to employ him.
    “Shall we start now?” Jack said.
    Did he have a choice?
    A fly buzzed and thudded against the inside of an empty coffee cup on the desk, but Jack and Ralph did not notice.
    “Yes.”
    Neither of them had any way of knowing just what they had committed themselves to.
- 7
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- 9
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Cowardice