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The Lost Queen	By : roguey17 Category: A through F > Chronicles of Narnia Views: 23901 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own The Chronicles of Narnia, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 8
- 9
Chapter 8: Beauty in the Breaking
Time moved back and forth for Peter, from their fights to their desperate kisses, from London to Narnia, from love to hate and back to love again.
She had been beautiful. Even when she was just a little girl, her face was a picture of grace and elegance. He remembered playing with her, staring wide-eyed at a newborn Edmund and holding her as she cried when their mother told them Lucy was going to be born, for she no longer would be his favorite sister.
Then they were older. War. Fear. And they clung to eachother in desperation. And then, Narnia.
Queen. Friend. Lover. Wife. She had been all of those things in what they called “The Golden Age” He remebered her sweet touch, her whispers and the call of his name in the moment of passion.
The White Stag. The Wardrobe. They returned, but they weren’t the same. They weren’t children anymore. He remebered the first night he slept alone in his bed, how he clung to his pillow seeking a replacement for her warmth. And then the soft footsteps that echoed through the hallway, his door opening slowly and her sillouhette against its frame.
Tears streamed down both of their faces as he opened his arms and she ran towards him and buried her head in his chest.
“I don’t want this!” Susan yelled. “I miss our bed!” She complained
“Me too,” he smiled through his tears. “But it isn’t the same here, Su.”
“Why can’t it be?” She pulled back from him and stared into his blue eyes. “Love is the same here and in Narnia.”
“We’ll be judged!” He lowered his head.
“What do you care?” She snapped, her face red with fury. “You never did in Narnia,” she added in a whisper.
“No, that was your job, remember?”
“I think I learned my lesson,” she said furiously. “So the roles have been reversed.” She stated sadly and moved to leave.
Peter reached for her and grabbed her arm. “They *will* judge us,” he lamented. “But we don’t have to worry about it tonight... let them question us tomorrow,” he pleaded.
Susan’s eyes filled with tears once more. “Yes.” She agreed. “We’ll worry about it in the morning,” she said as she slid into bed next to him.
And that became their motto, she came to his bed and they slept as man and wife. But she left in the morning before anyone could see.
A year passed of secret meetings and stolen kisses and they found themselves going back to Narnia. For a few wonderful hours his thoughts were filled with going back to the way it used to be and the hope of finally being together again. But then Aslan told them they could never go back and he saw the hope flicker away from her eyes.
When they went back, she never visited him in the night anymore.
Peter watched with horror how his beloved Susan was replaced with a mere shell of her former self. She busied herself with parties and suitors and his heart broke little by little when he saw her return home late, smuged red lipstick across her face.
He tried to get interested in other girls. But they weren’t her, they would never be her. And so he began to document his romance with Susan in his private notebooks, it was the only way he could feel her close to him in those days.
Time kept passing and the gap between them grew deeper. He left for college. She didn’t say goodbye.
And then one night as he was writting on his latest notebook in his flat, the doorbell rang.
He opened the door and there she stood. She was soaked to the bone, her make up was all over her face, he didn’t know if it was from the rain or from the obvios redness in her eyes.
She slapped him with all her might. He just stood there flabbergasted. God, she could not be older than seventeen and yet she held herself as if she had already lived two lifetimes.
Then he remembered that, in fact, she had.
“Ask me to leave,” she begged. “Tell me it’s no use!” She cried.
“What are you talking about?”
“Like you don’t know!” She yelled and entered the apartment, dropping her purse on the couch and running a hand through her messed up hair.
“I really don’t, Susan,” he said truthfully.
“They all look the same!” She continued to ramble. “If you put any two of them together, you can’t really tell the difference,” she said in a small voice.
This was one conversation he didn’t want to be having with her. “They’re just boys, Susan,” he said angrily.
“Exactly!”
“Exactly what?” He asked with annoyance.
“They’re boys,” she said moving closer to him. “I want a King,” she stated, placing a hand on his chest.
He tried to ignore the tingling her touch brought and he gently removed her hand.

”You said it was just a game,” he said cruelly. “Then leave it at that!” He yelled, hot angry tears streaming down his face.
“The game I play is everyday I spend without my King,” she sobbed.
“It’s wrong!” He yelled.
“Says who?”
“Everyone!” He countered as a matter of fact.
“I don’t care anymore about what ‘everyone’ thinks anymore,” she said softly. “Peter, I need my King...” Susan smiled through her tears.
“I’m just a boy.”
“You will never be... Just. A. Boy.” She emphasized each word as she closed the gap between them.
Her lips met his in a moment of desperation.
He remembered feeling lost and found at the same time. It was what he had been yearning for, the only thing he could ever want. His hands found her breasts and she moaned softly against his mouth.
He pulled away softly and stared at her through heavy lids. God, she was beautiful. He gently placed his arms under her and carried her towards the bathroom. He set her down in front of the mirror and grabbed a damp cloth, which he ran gently across her face. Eyelids, cheeks, lips, he left no part of her features untouched. When he was done, he smiled. It was her. His Queen. She was back.
“Peter...” She whispered before he kissed her again. Delicately and deeply. He held her close, just feeling happy to have her in his embrace. She pulled away from him and placed feather-light kisses upon his face. “Take me to your room,” she said in a throarty whisper.
He didn’t know how they both managed to get there. He only knew that she felt soft underneath his hands. Though he began by explring her body through her clothes, Susan could barely wait and begged him to take them off.
Soon, she was standing naked before him, the moonlight caressing her milky white skin. He feared that if he should touch her she would vanish, but she grabbed his hand and placed it upon her breast, and his explorations began anew.
He shed his clothes quickly and before long they were both in bed, laying together and taking comfort in the other. Peter wasn’t sure he ever wanted to do anything else in his life. He just wanted to be with her, like this, forever. But his body had other ideas and he was becoming incresingly uncomfortable with his arousal.
As if reading his thoughts, Susan opened her legs and he accomodated himself between her thighs. Still caressing her and placing soft kisses across her jaw, he entered her in a swift motion.
Susan moaned with pain and pleasure when he started moving inside her, her tight walls clenching and unclenching around his manhood. No words were spoken but they held eachothers gaze as the danced together again. Finally, when neither could take it anymore, Peter released his hot seed inside of her and she screamed as she, too, reached her climax.
Peter smiled weakly at her before burying his face in her neck and whispering how much he loved her. She placed kisses upon his sweaty forehead and returned his feelings.
They made love many times that night, and the day after. It was a wonderful weekend spent in bed and in a newfound intimacy.
“We’ll make it work,” Susan said confidently as she stroked Peter’s hair, his head resting upon her shoulder.
“We will,” He smiled up at her and kissed her chin. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Sooner than they expected, Monday came and Peter had to go to a “very important meeting” Though he refused to tell her what it was about, he had begged her to join him.
“It will be nice, I promise,” he’d said while getting dressed. “Please come?”
“But I’m only making myself comfortable here,” she stretched out lazily in his bed, giving him a full view of her exposed breasts. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay?”
“I promised I would be there, Su,” he said sadly. “You won’t even walk me to the train station?”
“Too tired,” she turned around and hugged a pillow.
“I’ll be back tomorrow, I promise,” he said and with one last lingering kiss, he left her.
If only he had known... he would never have left that room.
The image of a naked Susan sprawled across his bed was replaced with an all too familiar scenery.
The blood stained sheets, the screams, the pain...
She was dying. He could feel her dying.
Susan! He screamed inside his head, trapped in his own nightmare.
*******
Edmund held Lucy against his chest outside Peter’s bedroom. The youngest Pevensie cried in earnest, muttering words such as “Sister” and “Why” between her sobs.
The Just King tried to soothe her, whispering words of reassurance that he didn’t believe himself. For all he knew his brother was on the verge of death and he now had a lifetime of memories of a sister who was, by all means, a stranger to him.
He pondered how Susan could be a stranger to him now. He remembered her gentle features and warm words and almost wept with Lucy for what had been taken from them.
A giggle broke Edmund out of his reverie.
His eyes scanned the corridor looking for the person who would laugh at them in their dire state only to see her in the far corner of the hall grabbing the hem of her dress and staring pointedly at the pair.
Harriet Lewis.
“Do you enjoy laying with her, Pevensie?” She asked Edmund, her tone filled with malice. “I suppose that if you take after your brother, you must really enjoy exploring her naked body, basking in the wrongness of your sin...”
Edmund was left speechless at her rude comments and was about to retort when he felt Lucy’s hand turn into a fist on his chest.
“Shut up,” she said calmly, almost gently. But Edmund wasn’t fooled, hours and hours of frustration and anger were catching up with his sister.
For some reason that only seemed to provoke the girl further. “Su said that a lot, you know. She really didn’t like me telling her the truth, we became really good friends. See, I taught her what happens to a sorry little sinner like her and-“
“Shut up!” Lucy said, this time more forcefully.
“I understand,” Harriet nodded calmly. “You and your family have denied Christ the Lord and live in this...” She stopped and looked around her as if to prove a point. “... Satanic utopia where that talking beast made you Kings and Queens. It must be real fun, but you don’t fool me,” the deranged girl stated with a smile. “When judgement day comes, I shall be by the Lord’s side as he burns down all of this in His wrath...”
Lucy laughed. “Are you serious?”
Harriet seemed taken aback for a second. “Of course I am,” she said matter of factly. “Are you not aware of your sin? Do you want to confess? You can still save yourselves!” She ran towards Edmund and Lucy and seized the latter by the shoulders.
Lucy pushed the stranger away from her. “Don’t touch me!” She yelled.
“Su liked to say that too.” Harriet smiled fondly as if recalling the most amusing memory. “She should have thought of saying that to the ‘High King’ in there, before he put the bastard in her belly,” she added with a smirk.
Edmund held Lucy by the shoulders; she was shaking from head to toe with fury. Before his little sister did anything harsh, he decided that maybe through her insanity he could get a few truths from Harriet.
“How long have you lived with Susan?” He asked, ignoring the bewildered look his sister gave him. A look that clearly said: How dare you initiate a conversation with her?
Harriet seemed lost in thought for a minute, before replying. “Since her second month”
“How is she without us?”
“She cries, she lies, she cries again.” Harriet stated putting one hand on top of the other as she spoke.
“She lies?” Edmund raised an eyebrow.
“She lied to my mother, she didn’t say anything about her sin.” A strange light beamed in Harriet’s eyes. “But I found out, Mother always thought I was stupid but I was clever enough to figure out her secret. Then it wasn’t hard to teach her a lesson...”
“What kind of lesson?” The young man’s voice trembled as he asked, unsure if he wanted to know.
“The lesson that made her bleed!”
“You harmed the baby!” Lucy accused. pointing a finger at her antagonist as new tears welled in her eyes. “And you call yourself a servant of God!” She cried with indignation.
“I am a servant of Christ!” Harriet screamed at the top of her lungs and moved her hand to slap the Brave Queen, only to have it caught in midair.
Harriet let out a muffled scream at what she saw in the youngest Pevensie’s eyes.
Pure hatred.
Lucy brutally twisted Harriet’s wrist until the other girl was on her knees begging her not to break it. She could hear Edmund’s weak protests but she didn’t care, this girl had caused Susan pain. Sweet, beautiful and fair Susan. The Gentle Queen. The Mother of her nephew... the woman she had always wanted to be. When the girl was crying loud enough for all Cair Paravel to hear, Edmund finally pulled them apart.
“That’s enough!” He said with mock severity; he knew he couldn’t blame Lucy for what she had done. If it had been up to him he would have had the nutter hung.
Harriet held her now bruised wrist as she tried to get away from the pair while yelling odd curses. “He sees everything! You shall be punished! You shall...” Soon her screams became a faint noise as she ran further down the hall.
Lucy covered her head with her hands. “That evil girl! Edmund, if she did anything to Susan or the baby...” the rest of her words were inintelligible though she was no longer crying.
“They will be alright,” Edmund said, trying to convince himself as much as his sister. “And when Peter wakes up, we will go back for them and we’ll disappear.”
”He’s not going to allow that.” She said sadly. Edmund didn’t need to ask who ‘He’ was.
“We’ll figure something out.”
Before any of them could say anything more, a strangled cry came from inside the bedroom. Brother and sister rushed inside hurriedly and Lucy almost wept for joy when she saw Peter sitting bolt upright in bed.
“Peter!” She cried and launched herself upon him, although he did not return her embrace.
“We were so worried,” Edmund said truthfully as he came to his brother’s side.
“Do you remember her?” Peter asked harshly, his back rigid and his eyes set on the wall.
Edmund and Lucy shared a look. “We do,” Lucy answered for both of them.
“Good,” Peter said calmly as he extricated himself from Lucy’s arms and started to get out of his bed.
“Peter...”
“You were really sick...”
“We though we might lose you for a while...”
“You shouldn’t be...”
Peter stood on shaky legs, his face a mask of uncertainty. “She’s hurting right now, they both are...” He headed for his sword immediatly.
“What do you mean?” Edmund asked with a confused expression.
“I’m going to get her... them, I’m going to get them back.” He said forcefully.
“You mean going against Him?” Lucy asked, a hint of fear in her voice.
“Yes.”
“Peter, you are not thinking straight...” Edmund echoed the terror in his sister’s voice. “We can always go back...”
“NO!” Peter yelled. “He lied to me, He used me, He let me do such things to all those girls...” The High King spoke those words in a regretful whisper before turning to look into Lucy and Edmund’s eyes. “You don’t know what it’s like!” He yelled, his body trembling. “I LOVED HER AND HE TOOK THAT AWAY FROM ME!” He screamed at the top of his lungs. His shaking knees gave out under him and he started to cry bitterly as he tried to get up using his sword as a cane.
Lucy let out a strangled yell and ran towards her fallen brother, Edmund following closely. They both threw themselves over him.
“Are you two with me?” Peter asked desperately. When his siblings hesitated, he screamed, “ARE YOU?”
“We are, Peter,” Edmund said and Lucy nodded.
“Then we get her back or blood will run in Cair Paravel.”
- 8
- 9
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The Lost Queen