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Ax the Prostitute	By : musicman88 Category: A through F > Animorphs Views: 6938 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own The Animorphs or anything related to them, and I do not make any money from these writings.

Chapter List
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Human Date: September 21st, 1998
Andalite Date: 8593.8
Beginning Timestamp: 3:33pm Human Time
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I have not had the chance to write anything recently due to many factors, but by far the biggest one has been that I recently found out there were other Andalites sent to Earth for a special mission. This mission however was to enact biological warfare against the Yeerks and possibly the Humans as well. Even though it might have meant an end to the war it could also very easily have lead to the extinction of the human race. While the Andalite military might have seen this as a small price to pay my fellow Animorphs and I simply could not let that happen.
I have grown very fond of Humans during the time I’ve spent on their planet. I believe that they’re not just some other race on some other planet like the Andalite military probably thinks. They have a rich and interesting culture and they also have one of the best physical bodies I’ve seen. Making mouth sounds, the extreme sense of taste, and of course mating are all things that I believe could be shared with other sentient races around the universe.
But anyway, I have already written an entire separate manuscript of those events. I see no reason to continue discussing it further here.
I have also been busy doing other things as well. Marco, as always, has been visiting me regularly to mate and I’ve been enjoying it immensely. It’s nice to get a different perspective on mating every now and then and Marco’s style of mating is quite different from most of the male’s I professionally mate with. I have discussed the differences previously so I don’t see the need to repeat myself, but sometimes I forget how much I truly like a slower and more… intimate mating experience. When Marco mates with me it’s not just that he’s mating because he wants to mate, I feel as if there’s something else guiding him as well. I hadn’t really noticed up until recently, but Marco’s the only one who has ever kissed me while mating. Perhaps it’s just his own style of mating but perhaps there is something else that is driving him to mate differently. I must ask Marco about it the next time he comes to mate.
Of course Marco isn’t the only one I have been mating with. My professional mating career has been hugely successful. Most of the males that come to Tyrone’s celebrations are there simply to mate with me, and I’ve drawn quite a following. In fact, the celebrations had to begin earlier just so that every male who wanted to mate with me had the opportunity to do so at least once. Although I find it somewhat strange that given my ever growing list of customers the money I make always turns out to be around the same figure for whatever reason. Now, I’m not complaining by any stretch of the imagination. To be receiving all that pleasure along with the eight hundred to a thousand dollars for my services each night is quite a gift. Perhaps I’ve reached some sort of plateau for payment standards for professional maters. With everything that’s been happening recently I haven’t had the time to do much serious research on other professional maters. In fact, other that a single very large celebration where Tyrone hired a second professional mater (She was a bit mean and mad that I was stealing all her customers, but she also gave me some good advice), I have not seen any other professional maters do what I did so I could not make very many comparisons. But I assumed that I was doing a good enough job (my customers always seemed thrilled to mate with me) so I didn’t really see a need to observe other professional maters.
I didn’t mate every night since mating with that many males was extremely tiring (although I was getting better at managing it). I needed time to recover some of my energy in between. And it wasn’t as if Tyrone had a celebration scheduled every day either (although his gang does celebrate quite a bit). I averaged around two to three days between professional mating opportunities and I was perfectly happy with that workload. Marco and I mated almost every day as well so it wasn’t as if I had a great need to mate either (Well, not a tremendous need anyway). But even though I only professionally mate occasionally I still have been able to amass quite a large sum of money.
In total I have received $3,824 dollars in my professional mating career and I still have approximately $3,500 left to spend. I spent a small percentage of my money of various small parts for a few of my projects along with some food whenever I could. It wasn’t as if I couldn’t find anything else to spend my money on or couldn’t decide what to spend it on, it was something more disturbing than that. If I just started buying everything I possibly could the other Animorphs would begin to get suspicious about where all the money was coming from. And call me crazy, but I didn’t want to tell them how I was making it.
You see, I’ve only recently begun to feel strange about professional mating. There is something about it that I don’t quite understand. Mating professionally must be one of the easiest and most enjoyable ways of earning money available to humans. So then, if that is really the case, why isn’t every Human at least training to become a professional mater? And it’s not only that, but why do professional maters always seem so secretive about their profession? If they had any concept of simple economics they’d realize that not advertising could be detrimental to their business. And I have yet to see a single advertisement in any form of media for anything related to professional mating. Also, why do professional maters usually perform their services in such undesirable positions such as the spaces in between buildings? Mating in a bed is much more comfortable than mating over a waste receptacle. Why don’t these professional maters have any sort of actual workspace that they can use to mate. Perhaps a small group of professional maters could get together and rent a workspace. They could install a few comfortable beds and begin running a clean and comfortable business. But yet, even though it would be incredibly simple to do, I have never seen a professional mating business like that.
Perhaps being a professional mater means that you have below average intelligence. That seems like the only plausible explanation. I’ll be the first to admit that being a good professional mater does take some careful thinking and planning, but mating itself is driven by instinct. Even a mentally challenged Human could probably mate fairly successfully. And it’s the male’s who do most of the work usually anyway, so as long as the female is alive and conscious she’d probably be able to mate.
That must be it. Professional maters have to have very low intelligences. That’s why they don’t like to draw attention to themselves by advertising and perhaps that is why they cannot coordinate well enough to find a suitable building to center their business around.
I, along with all the other professional maters, do not want to be thought of as someone of below average intelligence as well. And even though that’s clearly not the case it would still be a negative stereotype that has the ability to follow someone no matter whether it’s true or not. My honor and pride as a member of the Andalite military would be called into question in that case and that would be unacceptable to me. That’s why I needed to hide my new occupation from my fellow Animorphs. I didn’t want to be thought of as someone who could do no better than mating for a living. And even though I had proven to be very intelligent when compared to humans many times I didn’t want to instill any doubt in their minds. So it would just be easier not to tell them at all.
But if there was one person that I had to tell it would be Tobias. He and I were shorms after all. And he was the one who I was really trying to be careful around. He had undoubtedly seen the numerous new things I had purchased and has probably beginning to get suspicious despite my best efforts. If it wasn’t for him visiting me just about every day I would’ve gone and purchased everything I possibly could as fast as I could. But I knew if I did that now then I would have to explain to him where I had gotten all that money from. And Tobias was the last person I wanted to view me as having below average intelligence.
But as time went on and the amount of money in my possession grew I began to consider telling him. Luckily he hadn’t asked me any difficult questions about the source of my money (I’ve said it before that if he asked me directly I would tell him. I simply will not lie to my shorm). But I didn’t like hiding things like this from him.
It hurt me inside to know that I wasn’t being completely truthful to him. I think I’m close to revealing everything to him though. He would probably be the best one to tell first since he would never view me as having below average intelligence (even though I can’t stop from wondering what if he did). He could probably explain quite a few things about professional mating to me. There are still a few…
Speaking of Tobias he’s just informed me that he’ll be visiting very shortly. I will continue at a later time.
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Ending Timestamp: 3:52pm Human Time
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Ax the Prostitute