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Last Christmas	By : LittleWing Category: Twilight Series > Slash > Edward/Jasper Views: 2251 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or make any money from this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Last Christmas
- 1
December twenty first, the first day of winter or winter solstice, and the day after Edward Cullen, my best friend, and I had been kidnapped last year. This year it was also the last day of school before winter break. I shivered slightly in the winter breeze as I waited by Edward’s car for his last class to let out. Last year we alternated between him driving for a week and then me, but after what happened before last Christmas I couldn’t stand to drive my jeep. The police found the jeep in January after school started up again, but I didn’t want it back. My parents were a little bit upset that I’d sold it after I’d worked so hard to buy and fix it up.

I couldn’t explain to them that, that was the car James and Vicki had driven us all over Seattle in, the car that James had first put his hands on Edward in, and the car that James had put a knife to my throat in while threatening Edward’s life. To explain that I would have had to explain that we know who took us, we know what they look like and Edward’s injuries didn’t come from his overly smart mouth, but one man’s inability to deal with rejection.

For a while I was afraid that James really was going to try to keep Edward; even if Edward wanted no part of what James was offering. I tried not to watch as James touched and whispered in Edward’s ear…not out of disgust of what James was doing, but because I whished it was me and that Edward wanted the attention. I never told Edward that for years I’ve thought of him less and less in a friendly manner. I’ve wanted him to be more to me since we were fourteen. I never told him because I didn’t want to lose his friendship. When he started dating Bella, I asked his sister out…any excuse or reason to be around him. At the time I’d been afraid that I’d lose him to Bella.

The first night that the brother and sister from hell had us I wanted to rip James’ head off for injuring Edward…and for groping the hell out of him. Given the choice I knew that Edward would have voted for Vicki to have been the one to grope and come on to him—he’d said as much. Edward would have given in to her. He wouldn’t have followed where she led, but he would have given in to her had she gone after him the way James did.

We never talked about our week spent in captivity. Not to our parents, friends, girlfriends, police…even each other. Bella’s dad had been curious why Edward and I disappeared just before Christmas and why Edward had been so banged up. Mr. Cullen had told him that Edward slipped on a patch of ice during our time in Seattle. It was a reasonable excuse for the sprained wrist, but was a poor excuse for the separated shoulder Edward had received after being shoved to the floor of that closet while his hands were still tied behind him.

“Ready to go?” Edward asked as he moved smoothly to the drivers door of his car, effectively pulling me from my thoughts of last years Christmas break.

“Yep,” I said sliding in to the passenger seat. “Bella coming?” I couldn’t help but hope that she wasn’t. I wanted to be alone with Edward, even if he had no clue why.

“No,’ he said sharply. “Alice is taking Bella home…she has to go visit her mother this Christmas, since she stayed here last year.”

“And?” I questioned. Alice had picked me up this morning and driven me to school, while Edward gave Bella a ride. At lunch Edward was suddenly telling me that he was taking me home. He never said that Alice was going to take Bella home.

“There’s something you need to know,” he said missing the turn to my house and going in the wrong direction to get to his house. I didn’t dare lean enough to see how fast he was going. I didn’t want to know…the trees were zipping by fast enough.

My mind raced with what he needed to talk to me about. He couldn’t possibly have suddenly developed the same feelings I have for him, nor did he find out about mine for him. As far I knew he and Bella had never had a fight.

“What about?” I asked as he pulled in to a small roadside park.

Wordlessly he pulled in to a parking space at the far end of the lot and turned off the engine. We sat in silence for a long moment, the cold air outside seeping in. I could barely make out the cars passing on the highway in the silence between us. He and Bella had not had a fight of that much I was certain. Had that been the case he would have bitched all way to my house and then shut up about it. I watched him with caution as he stared out the windshield of the car. His jaw was clenched, hands balled in to fists on his lap. He was tense; more than tense really, he was angry.

“Edward?” I kept my voice soft and even in an attempt to not startle him.

“I saw him, Jazz,” he said at long last. It was barely above a whisper and I had to strain to hear it.

“What?! Where?” I asked in shock. I didn’t have to ask who Edward meant when he said him. He’d seen James somewhere today. I couldn’t hear the last thing James had said to Edward before he left us in that cabin, but from the way Edward’s body had gone rigid I knew that it was not something Edward would be looking forward to.

“He said that he’d come visit me.”

“Where did you see him, Edward?”

“On the corner by my house…he smiled when he saw me…and waved.” He dropped his head to stare at the steering wheel. Relaxing one of his fisted hands, Edward brought it up to run through his copper red locks before leaving it to rest on the back of his neck.

Silence once again silence enveloped us in the cold air that had settled inside the car. He had never told me that they knew where he lived. He’d never wanted to talk about anything James had said to him. I never pushed any of it because, like him, I believed that it was over. We both believed that James and Vicki were gone never to be heard from again. I wanted to reach over and give his shoulder a small squeeze to reassure him that it would be all right, but I didn’t. It was too tempting to allow that moment we had between the time they left us and our parents found us to surface again. If I allowed that to happen I would not be able to stop from wanting more of Edward.

“I’m afraid, Jazz,” he said breaking the silence and continuing to stare at the black circle of the steering wheel. “I’ve been afraid to be home alone for a year…afraid that when I turn around he’d be there. Afraid to fall asleep and wake to find him next to me…We can’t go to Chief Swan about this. There’ll be too many questions…”

“Why don’t I come spend up to Christmas Eve at your house,” I suggested quietly. He turned to look at me, green eyes pleading and questioning at the same time. “We can go out during the day…get away from your house. And I’ll be there at night.”

He relaxed slightly as he thought over my suggestion. “Thank you.”

“Why don’t we head to my house, I’ll pack, talk to mom and then we can go to your house?”

He stared at me a moment longer and then turned his attention back to the forest before us. He said nothing as he turned the key in the ignition and put the car in reverse. We drove in silence to my house. I wanted to know what he was thinking. Was he truly happy that I wanted to stay at his house for a week or was he laughing inside at the suggestion? We had been together when James and Vicki had grabbed us last year. It helped that they’d had the element of surprise on their hands and James’ had had a knife to Edward’s throat. But if James really wanted to get to Edward would I really be able to stop him or would I just get in the way? Towards the end of last year’s event James had used me against Edward.

Even then I knew that Edward did what James asked to keep me from getting hurt. I would rather have taken the beating than been forced to watch James attempt to cajole Edward in to things he clearly did not want. I couldn’t blame Edward for not allowing James to beat on me instead of put up with his near molestation. Edward had no clue of my feelings for him and how much it hurt to see him let James touch him.

Worry was not the correct emotion to say I was feeling after Edward’s declaration of seeing James by his house. Fear was a better word. I was afraid that James would try to steal him; in more than one way. I was afraid that James would break into the house and finish what he started last year before forcing Edward to leave with him. The offer to stay with Edward was purely selfish. I wanted to watch over Edward…to make certain that James did not break in to steal Edward from me. I wanted to protect Edward from James. I wanted to be the one to make Edward feel safe.

“Will your mom let you, after what happened last year?” He asked pulling in to the driveway.

“Long as I’m home in time for Christmas, I don’t think that she’ll object too much to me staying at your house for a few days,” I said pulling on the door handle. “Besides she’s at work right now, so by the time she knows that I’m staying with you I’ll already be settled at your place.”

He smiled and let out a small laugh at my logic as he followed me to the front door. We settled in on conversation of what we were going to do during the day on the way to my room. He sat cross legged on my bed as I stuffed four days worth of clothes in to a small duffle I’d kept stowed in the back of my closet. So far we’d planned one trip to Port Angeles for a movie and general hanging out, possible trips to a few of the other towns near Forks, and gaming at his house on the last day.

I wanted to melt at how happy he seemed to be by my coming to stay with him. His smile was natural and relaxed, unlike how he’d been less than an hour ago. I did that for him. A part of my heart sank in the sadness of the knowledge that his happiness with my actions was not what I wanted it to be. I wanted it to be more to him than a friend offering him a shoulder to lean on and a false sense of security. I wanted this week to be more than him taking comfort in what he believed to be empty promises.

“I’m ready,” I said grabbing the handles of my bag. Before I could reach the door, Edward leapt from my bed and met me there.

“Jasper,” he said putting a hand on my shoulder to stop me from leaving. “Thanks for doing this for me…I really appreciate it.” Something I had never seen before flashed through his green eyes. It was an odd mixture of fear, hope, and sadness.

I shook my head slowly, pushing the urge to lean down the few inches between us and take his full lips against my own to the side, and smiled at him. “Anytime,” I said. It was the first thing that came to mind…other than the lamer yet you’d do the same for line. Saying I love you would have been better than what I’d said, but I wasn’t ready to have my heart handed to me.

He dropped his hand from my shoulder as he headed out of my room. I followed him down the stairs. He waited in the living room, watching out the window, as I sat at the kitchen table to leave mom a note. The Cullen’s would be getting a call later, of that I was certain. Mom hated to let me leave the house to go to school, let alone stay overnight anywhere—especially the Cullen’s. For the first six months of this year I saw her peek in my room, not to make sure that I hadn’t sneaked out, but to make sure that I hadn’t been taken away again. That week last year had been hell for them. Esme and Carlisle had only told them the night they came for us that Edward and I had been kidnapped. Outside of my parents and the Cullen’s no one knew what we had gone through last Christmas break…only that Edward had slipped on a patch of ice an injured himself.

It had been a secret for a year, and I, for one, would like to keep it that way. I know that Edward feels the same. Mike Newton was already pissed that Edward had stolen “his girl” by dating Bella, the last thing Edward needed was Newton using James’ preference for him to break them up. Bella had been a hard sell on where we’d been for a week, but with everyone around Edward and me telling the same lie she had no choice but to accept it as truth. I could still see the look of doubt in her eyes when she’d bring up last Christmas in an attempt to get the truth from Edward. Fortunately, Edward is much better at lying than she is.

I stuck the note to the fridge and headed for the living room, bag in hand. “Shall we?” I asked as I neared the door.

“Let’s,” he said with a light smile.

I pulled the door open and stepped out in to the newly started misty rain. He opened the trunk to his shiny silver car for me to toss my bag in and then climbed in to the driver’s seat. Happily I dropped the bag in the waiting trunk, shoved it closed and climbed in to the seat beside him. He peeled out of the driveway, leading me to believe that he’d speed the entire way back to his house, but he didn’t. His speed slowed before we got to the end of the street, and stayed at a steady limit of legal until we reached his house.

“No hurry to get home, huh?” I questioned as he pulled in to the garage.

He turned with a smirk on his lips. “Nope,” he said.

I couldn’t help but hope that he meant that he wanted to spend a little bit more time alone with me, not that he wanted to scope out the neighborhood to see if James was still hanging around. James was brassy, but there was no way he would risk someone calling Chief Swan because of his suspicious behavior. James wouldn’t risk being caught when he was this close to Edward…again.

Edward brushed passed me as he moved toward the door to the garage. He pressed a button next to the door and the garage door slowly came down, shutting out the cold, wet air of the winter. Taking a few long strides I caught up to Edward as he opened the door and stepped in to the kitchen.

Alice was at the counter filling two glasses with water from a pitcher they kept in the refrigerator. Edward stopped just inside the room, eyes locked on the glasses. I ran in to his back, chin bumping lightly against the back of his head. I ignored the sting of the collision, wondering instead who the second glass was for. Esme was in Portland to help with the planning and overseeing of some architectural project she was working on and Carlisle in a good week all but lived at the hospital. Bella was the first person to pop in to my head. She and Alice were best friends…it made sense. What Alice said, however, did not make an ounce of sense.

“Edward, you’re home!” She practically squealed, setting the pitcher on the counter. “You’re never going to believe who’s here. A guy you went to elementary school with was passing through when he decided to look you up.”
“What guy?” Edward asked voice and body stiff with fear.

“He’s in the living room…said his name was Jim.” She moved to pick up the glasses. Her hazel green eyes rested on Edward and the rigidness of his body. I didn’t have to face him to know that fear was written in his eyes. I also knew that Alice would notice the fear in him. She would feel guilty later about letting someone in…or she’d blame herself for not knowing that something wasn’t right with the guy or the story he told.

“Edward,” James’ voice sounded from the archway separating the kitchen from the large family room. It almost took me off guard to hear the soft, nearly tender, tone to his voice. “It’s so good to see you again. It’s been a long time,” he said moving from the doorway. To our horror, and I’m sure James’ delight, he advanced on Edward. In one quick move he pulled Edward in to a hug. I wanted to pull him off Edward and throw him to the floor, but I couldn’t move.

He whispered something in Edward’s ear, causing Edward to let out a strangled breath. Edward stayed perfectly rigid in James’ arms…he hadn’t moved since Alice had told us that some guy that used to go to school with Edward was there. James released Edward from the one sided hug, keeping one arm around Edward’s shoulders somewhat awkwardly. I hadn’t really noticed the height difference last year—with the not wanting to watch James practically maul Edward, and all—but Edward had a good two inches of height on the guy.

“Is there somewhere in this town where we could grab a bite to eat and get reacquainted?” James asked, his voice full of cheer and friendliness—arm still around Edward’s shoulders.

Alice watched the three of us, hard, for a long moment before offering to leave the three of us alone. Without another word she left. I knew that she knew there was something not right, and that she was most likely on her cell phone to either Esme or Carlisle.

“What are you doing here?” I asked fighting my urge to yank Edward from his grasp.

“Exactly what I told the little girl,” James said, dropping his arm from Edward’s shoulders and turning to lean against the counter top, “I’m passing through and wanted to see how Eddie was doing.”

“Why? You got all the money out of his family that you’re going to get,” I growled at him, moving to stand slightly between them. The look that crossed James’ face had me thinking that I had made a mistake.

“Never said that I was here for money, kid,” he spat back at me, voice low and nearly a growl. “But I am rather hungry and was serious about getting something to eat and catching up.” He pushed away from the counter and once more stood too close to Edward. “My treat…and I’ll drive.” He smiled—it was a sickly sweet smile that almost reminded me of the grim reaper from an old movie.

“We’re not going anywhere with you,” I said as harshly as I could, placing a hand on Edward’s shoulder.

James smirked and leaned in to Edward’s ear. Edward slowly shook his head from side to side. He didn’t object, verbally or physically, when James gripped his upper arm and began to lead him to the front door. Partially hypnotized by the sight of James once again leading Edward away from me and determined to not let Edward go with James alone, I followed behind them.

Edward and I both gasped when we got to the front porch and saw my jeep parked along the curb. Nothing on it had been touched. It was exactly as it had been the last time I’d seen it—when I gave it over to the police for auction. I had hoped to never see it again.

“You can ride in the back,” James shot at me over his shoulder as he dragged Edward toward the passenger seat. “But Edward rides up front.”

“Edward, we don’t have to do what he says,” I said, pausing at the door to the jeep.

“Yes, we do, Jazz,” he choked out.

“Why? What’s he using to force you?” He was using Edward to force me. James couldn’t be using me against Edward again. It was something else entirely. Alice. James threatened to go back in the house and hurt Alice. I swallowed hard against the realization.

“He said that he’d kill Alice and anyone who came through the front door if I…” he trailed off, dropping his gaze to the ground beneath his feet.

“Bastard,” I spat at James before climbing in to the backseat. James threatened to kill Edward’s entire family. Hell he’d probably do that anyway…then Edward would have no reason not to stay with him.

James laughed leaning across Edward to fasten the seatbelt. He stared at me, a look of challenge in his eyes, as he nuzzled his cheek against Edward’s jaw. The belt clicked in to place and he leaned away. Before he pulled away from Edward completely James ran his finger tips along Edward’s jaw until they pulled at his lips. He smiled at the anger filled glare I gave him. Taking his eyes off me, James closed the door and all but skipped to the driver’s door.

“Where’s your sister?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” he said pulling the car away from the curb. “We split up about six months ago…think that she said something about Cancun or something like that. Hope you don’t mind, but we’re not staying in town to eat. I saw a nice little place a few miles to the north that I want to try.”

“Are you kidnapping us again?” Edward asked staring out the window.

James didn’t answer, and I couldn’t bring myself to break the silence. The answer was obvious: he was.

“Thought so,” Edward said quietly still not looking away from the window. I could practically feel his fear and anger of and at the man driving us to only God-knew-where. This was the moment we had both feared for the last year; James and Vicki showing up and making off with one or both of us. It wouldn’t end as nicely this time as it did last year. This year someone was going to be much more seriously injured…killed even. And I had the distinct feeling that, that someone would be me. James didn’t want me here with them. He wanted Edward and Edward alone. But James also perceived that I wanted Edward. Killing me would get rid of any threat I posed of him not being able to have Edward the way that he wanted him.

“Are you going to kill us…this time?” This time Edward turned to look at James. I could tell that he didn’t want to ask by the way that his voice broke.

The jeep swerved to the side of the road and came to a stop. James turned to face Edward, anger written clearly on his face. His fingers tightened on the steering wheel momentarily before he let go.

“No, Edward, I’m not going to kill you,” he said almost tenderly, reaching out to touch Edward’s face. Edward rolled his eyes to look at me. I knew the silent question that he was asking with his eyes. What about Jasper? “I want to show him something.”

James dropped his hand from Edward’s face and turned his attention back to the road. Within seconds he had us back on the road.

“What…what do you want to show him?” Edward stammered, not looking away from James.

“How do you like the jeep?” James asked, changing the subject. “I saw it at an auction in Portland and just couldn’t resist it.” Neither Edward nor I said anything. This jeep was the last thing Edward and I wanted to see or be riding around Washington State in either. He laughed at our silence. “Come on, Edward, don’t tell me that you don’t think about the times we had in the backseat…or the things we could have done.”

“I don’t think of you like that,” Edward snapped once again facing forward in his seat, staring out the window and passing greenery. “I don’t normally think of you at all.”

“You said that you wanted to show me something,” I said trying to be cautious as I spoke. “What is it?”

“You’ll see when we get there.”

“Get where, Canada?!” I hadn’t intended to snap at the crazy man driving the vehicle we were trapped in.

“You’ll just have to wait and see,” James said, mimicking my snipped tone. “We’re almost there.”

I kept my mouth shut and watched the road stretching out in forest lined turns before us. Edward did not speak again either. James didn’t take us much further up the road before he made a left turn off the main highway to a drive that wasn’t marked in any manner that I noticed. The drive was more of a vehicle path that was unpaved. Tree branches scraped across the roof of the jeep, while the shocks took the brunt of the bumps in the path that was only wide enough for one jeep, and I wondered where he was taking us. The path in front of us darkened as the trees thickened and the highway behind us became less than visible.

The thought that he was taking us along an unmarked forestry trail to a secluded part of a national forest to kill one or both of us crossed my mind as the minutes passed with only changing shades of green to be seen. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. I didn’t want to leave Edward with James. My fear of that happening increased the further from the road we got.

Slowly through the trees a small clearing began to form out of the trees. As James navigated the bumpy trail to the clearing a small cabin came in to view. Wood lined one end of the small front porch just under a window. Any brush or over growth near the structure looked as though it had been cleared away recently.

“It’s not quite the same as the one from last year,” James said, bringing the jeep to a stop near the front porch. “But it’s just as cozy…and this year it’ll be warm. There’s no electricity or much in the way of running water, but we’ve got plenty of firewood and I got lots of bottled water.” He climbed from the jeep and waited at the front of the jeep for Edward to follow.

“Don’t bother trying to make a run for it. Forks is two hours behind us and we’re more than five miles from the nearest public road,” James all but shouted at us when we made no attempt to leave the vehicle. “No phones, no cell phones, no police, no neighbors to hear, no way to be found.”

I shook my head and swore under my breath. The bastard had thought of almost everything—had planned this for months. I let out a shaky breath. He’d had months to plan what he wants to show me and how he’s going to kill me. That was the only reason behind his allowing me to come along I could think of. With me dead and a standing threat to Edward’s family, James would be able to make Edward do whatever it was he wanted.

“How long have you had this planned?” I asked sliding from the backseat. I didn’t move from the door of the jeep, not out of fear of the man standing in front of it but too keep myself from attacking the man right then.

“Long enough,” James said cryptically. “Now, let’s get going…Jasper still has something to do.”

I wanted to asked how it went from showing me something to me doing something, but I kept my mouth shut and followed James in to the cabin—Edward at my side.

He was right it was nicer than the cabin they’d had us squatting in last year. This one had a working fireplace, furniture that wasn’t covered in inches of dust and mold. The kitchen area was small, more of a kitchenette, with a small round table and three chairs sitting in a small dining area. The fireplace was in the center of the main room with a bedroom just on the other side of it. A small couch had been placed directly in front of the fireplace. Next to the hearth sat a neat stack of split wood ready to be used in the fire. The floors were hardwood. A few were old and weathered looking while most were new planks.

As we came through the front door James grabbed Edward, pulling him to his side. Edward didn’t object as James’ arm snaked around his waist to hold him tightly, but shot me a pleading look.

“What is it that I have to do?” I asked sharply. I wanted to look away from the scene of James holding Edward to his side as though a strong wind would blow through taking Edward with it. James was a man desperate for the attention and affection that Edward did not want to give. It was a feeling I knew all too well, but unlike James I was not willing to lose Edward by forcing myself at him.

James said nothing for the longest moment. He merely smiled and pulled Edward closer. I was not going to like what he had to say, that much was clear from his actions. Edward paled further as James rubbed his cheek against Edward’s throat before settling his chin in the crook between Edward’s shoulder and neck. Not being subtle or coy about his intentions for my best friend, James moved to place a quick kiss on the skin of Edward’s neck before once again resting his chin on Edward’s shoulder.

“Last year I saw how you looked at him…how you looked at me,” his voice was soft and careful, as though he might say the wrong thing and give away some secret…my secret. Crap, this was going to be bad. “You wanted to kill me. Not just for hurting your friend…there was another reason, wasn’t there?”

The look of fear and disgust melted from Edward’s face as James spoke. Confusion became written clearly in his emerald eyes. James wanted me to confess my feelings for Edward, probably with the hope that Edward would turn to him in revulsion of my long hidden feelings. I don’t know how James thought Edward would turn to him if my confession disgusted him. The man was truly insane if he thought that would actually work.

“What’s he talking about, Jazz?” Edward asked as the silence following James’ cryptic words filled the air of the cabin.

“Your best friend has something to tell you, and no one is leaving until he does,” James said releasing his hold on Edward, a smug smile painted across his lips.

The one thing that I didn’t want Edward to find out was the one thing that was going to keep us all prisoner in the cabin. It was also the one thing that I wanted to tell Edward more than anything…just not like this. I wanted to tell him when he was ready to hear it, not because some insane idiot was jealous and wanted to make himself feel higher to Edward than me. Over candles and flowers would not have been how I would have told him either. Odds are I would have blurted it out in the heat of a sports argument or when we were drunk for the first time while in college.

I was thankful to Alice for not ever voicing her concerns about me and our relationship to Edward. She caught on fast to why I asked her out. In the two years we were together she never pushed me for anything more than the companionship that we offered each other. We rarely touched more intimately than friends would. She had told me early on that after high school she would be heading east for school and to audition for a dance company she wanted to dance with, and that we would be over. Her future in dance came first. That was fine with me.

Our relationship served its purpose. She got to have the appearance of a boyfriend to help fend off Mike Newton and I got to spend time with Edward…even if it was mostly on double dates.

“Don’t you want to know why he followed you out the front door, not that it would have mattered, I would have dragged him along anyway, instead of following your sister to safety? Aren’t you the least bit curious why he asked her out in the first place?”

I glared at James as he moved past Edward toward the small dining table. Pulling out a chair he sat down to watch Edward’s growing anxiety and my growing discomfort with what James expected me to do.

“What do you think you’ll gain from this?” I asked not looking away from the perplexed expression on Edward’s face. I could practically see Edward’s thoughts as he tried to figure out what James was getting at and what I knew. They ranged from me harboring feelings for Bella to me being jealous of his family’s wealth. Not one of the thoughts considered for a moment that my real desire was to…

“I gain nothing from what I’m making you do, Jasper,” James said with a smirk, jarring me from my thoughts that were quickly taking a very racy theme. “But it is fun watching you squirm. It doesn’t matter to me,” he stood from his spot at the table and quickly approached me, “if he hates you or not. He’s mine either way, Kid.”

“He’s not a toy to be possessed or given away when it’s become broken,” I retorted.

“What’s going on, Jasper?” Edward asked moving from the spot James had left him near the front door. His vivid green eyes held mine and he walked the short distance to James and me. If this were a cartoon his pupils would have been question marks. “What’s he talking about?” He stepped between James and me.

“He wants me to tell you something,” I said, not taking my eyes from his, “Something that he’s guessed at…and hopes to use to take you away. It doesn’t matter if I tell you or not, he’s still not going to give you up.”

Edward turned his gaze to the floor as he mumbled, “I know.” He took several deep breaths, exhaling slowly, carefully pulling himself together. I looked over Edward’s bowed head to stare, icily, at James wishing that looks could kill.

“Oh, come on,” James groused, running a hand through his short light brown. “Just tell him already!”

“Do you scream at the characters in horror movies too?!” I snapped at him.

Edward suddenly began laughing, stopping anything that would have happened between James and me. He wrapped his arms around his ribs and slowly brought his head up from its bow. He turned to a stunned James. “You still think that Jasper is your only competition for me?” He questioned through his laughter.

“What do you mean only?” James asked caught off guard by Edward’s sudden change in attitude at the situation. “Are you saying that there are more people after you?”

“You mean besides half of the female population at Forks high school, and most of the adult female population of the town?” His laughter quieted. “I have no idea how many gay men may be attracted to me, only you have hit on me, James.”

“Look around you, Ed, only Jasper and I are here,” James said, frustration and anger tinting the tone of his voice. “So, at the immediate moment there are only two of us here in want of your affections!”

Silence fell over the three of us after James’ outburst. I didn’t know what to say to James’ revelation. Edward didn’t seem to know what or want to say anything. James looked the most shocked of all. I was hopeful that James would walk out the front door and leave us there to find our own way home. It was a slim hope, but a hope nonetheless.

“Fine,” James said in careful tone, reaching around Edward to grip my arm, “If this is the way you two want it…” he pulled me forward. Stunned my legs moved gracelessly as he tugged me toward the front door. I could hear Edward follow us.

I tried not to slip on the patches of ice as James let me across the front yard to a small gathering of trees near the edge of the forest. In one sharp move he swung me ahead of him. I lost my footing and landed in a heap between the trees.

“You know why you’re here,” he said with a sneer. I nodded. I’d known since he allowed me to get in to the jeep that he wanted me out of the way. Edward was a little foolish to think that James wouldn’t double back to Forks and kill his entire family. James wanted Edward with nowhere to go back to, no one to come looking for him. He wanted Edward alone in every sense of the word. “There’s a shovel…start digging.”

I looked at the ground thick with untouched grass. There wasn’t any snow in the thick of the trees, but I would have still bet that the ground was mostly frozen. I could feel how solid and hard the soil felt beneath my hands, digging through it would not be easy, nor would it be done in a day. I glared up at James. James smiled down at me. My eyes caught Edward’s movement behind James. Reluctantly I took my hate filled gaze from our kidnapper to look at Edward. He looked like a man facing an avalanche.

“Why should I make it easy for you?” I spat at James, taking my eyes off Edward and the panicked expression marring his normally beautiful face. “We both know why you wanted me here.”

“You son of a bitch,” Edward said, suddenly stepping between me and James. “You brought him here to kill him?! Why? So that he can’t steal me away from you?! He never was a threat to you! There’s nothing between Jasper and I, any more than there is between me and you. It’s all in your sick little head!”

I flinched at Edward’s words. He really believed that I could have no feelings for him other than brotherly friendship. I couldn’t blame him for that. I had never once led him to believe that I could care more for him than that. Telling him now would taint the truth behind the words. He’d think that I was only saying what James wanted to hear. Even I did say exactly what James wanted to hear it would not save my life. James wanted me dead regardless of if I told Edward or not. He just wanted Edward to live with the knowledge that he could have had me all this time.

James stared at the both of us. He was seething from Edward’s words. Wordlessly he turned away from us and stormed toward the jeep. We watched in silence as he yanked the passenger door open. In a quick jerk of a movement he opened the glove box and pulled something out. Closing the door with an echoing slam James made his way back to us in a stomping huff. Anger and determination mixed in his storm filled eyes as he closed in on Edward. Edward shrank away from the smaller angry man.

I watched, panic and fear of what James was up to pulling at my very core, as James stalked toward Edward at a faster pace than he’d used in getting to the jeep. In one quick, solid move he lashed out and gripped Edward’s wrist. With a quick flick of his own arm, James spun Edward around to face me and the place James intended to be my grave. Within seconds he had Edward’s arms restrained behind him and Edward on his knees.
“We can debate this all day,” James said pulling something from the waist band of his jeans, “or you can start digging.”

“You won’t kill him,” I said pushing myself to my feet.

“Someone dies this week, Jasper,” he said placing what he’d taken from the waistband of his jeans against the back of Edward’s head. My brain stalled and I couldn’t breathe. He had gun to Edward’s head. “It’s your choice who it is.”

“What happens after I’m out of the picture? Do you think that he’s going to want to stay with you out of anything but fear? Or are you hoping that he’ll go all Stockholm on you?” I grabbed the shovel from its spot against one of the thicker trunked trees. “Who’s next, huh?!” I drove the tip of the shovel blade in to the mostly hard ground at my feet, “His mom, dad, sister, girlfriend…your sister?” I grunted harshly as I forced the first load of dirt out of the ground and tossed it toward the base of a tree.

“Are you going to force him to drag my body out here or are you just planning on killing me in the hole I’m digging?” I continued to rant as I dug out another shovel full of dirt and tossed it on the same pile as the first. “Gonna make him shovel the dirt back on top too? Or is that something you’re looking forward to?”

He didn’t answer any of my angry questions, merely watched as I dug a wider and wider hole around where I stood. Anger fueled my every strike at the ground with the shovel. I look up from my anger filled shoveling of hard forest floor to see the look on Edward’s face, and I didn’t want to see the smug expression I knew would cover James’ face. I kept my eyes on the ground, only looking up to see the mound of dirt I’d piled by a tree.

Breathing heavily and barely able to grip the shovel I finally stopped. My shoes were caked in dirt, as were my jeans, shirt and hands. Sweat beaded down my forehead and soaked in to my shirt. I shivered in the cold air. I turned to James. He’d put the gun away, but Edward still sat on his knees on the ground before him.

“That’s good enough for today,” James said pulling Edward to his feet. “You’re going to keep digging until you tell him.” He pulled Edward toward the cabin. I followed.

Without being told I kicked my shoes off just inside the front door. Being careful, though I really don’t know why, I stripped my shirt from my body and placed it with my shoes. For the first time in my life it had paid off to wear more than one shirt.

“Have a seat,” James said motioning to the couch and the fire he’d started. Edward sat alone in the middle of the couch, arms still restrained behind him. I glowered at James as I moved passed him to sit next to Edward on the couch. The fire was warm, stopping my shivers from the cold.

“What does he want you tell me so badly?” Edward asked, leaning in close to whisper.

No time like the present. I thought to myself, glancing over my shoulder to see James moving about in the kitchen area. I let out a sigh and leaned back on the couch.

“He wants me to tell you that I’m in love with you.” I pinched the bridge of my nose with my thumb and index finger. I didn’t want to look at him. To Edward it was a joke, something that James wanted to hear…a lie that existed in our captor’s mind. To me it was truth that had existed for more than three years. I pushed it down and pretended that I wasn’t in love with my best friend because I knew Edward. He wouldn’t make fun of me. He wouldn’t knock me out with a fist to the face. He probably wouldn’t even yell. But he would deny it or he’d stop feeling comfortable around me and pull away.

Edward chuckled beside me on the couch. I didn’t open my eyes. I didn’t want to see the amusement in his eyes…not from this.

“He said stuff like that last year,” he said quietly. “He kept telling me that I wished his hands were yours…I denied it. I told him that I didn’t want your hands on me the way that his were. But when I woke up and I was in your lap and your fingers were combing through my hair…like mom’s used to…I…I don’t know, Jazz. Is it true?”

I had to open my eyes and look at him. His hair looked almost orange from the glow of the fire place. His deep green eyes were lit with something akin to confusion and honesty as he stared at me. If we weren’t being held against our will…if James weren’t just across the room…if Edward weren’t tied up…so many if’s; I would have slid my fingers in to his silky hair, pulled him to me and taken his mouth in a passionate kiss. He looked so perfect, so beautiful in that light.

Carefully constructing my thoughts, I licked at my bottom lip. I didn’t want to make this entire thing more difficult for him than it already was by telling him that yes I did in fact love him as way more than a friend or brother; that I wanted him the way James did. He didn’t need to fear two of us coming after him. But at the same time the feelings had gotten so damn strong that I couldn’t deny them any longer either. My love life is almost a bad 80s song.

“Jazz?” Edward questioned leaning in closer to me.

“Edward, if I tell you that it’s true would it bring you any level of comfort?” He stared at me, clearly uncertain of what to say as an answer. “If I told you that I’ve loved you for a long time would you still want to be close to me? Or would you push away from me, using college as an excuse to cut ties? If I told you that it is truth, what James thinks, where would it leave me, Edward?”

The uncertainty in Edward’s eyes was clear and spoke louder than any words he would say. He was undecided how he felt about it what I’d just said. Edward was anything but the experiment or play around until he figured things out type. When the competition between Jessica and Bella had started playing out, he didn’t go on a date with both of them to decide which he liked better. When Edward made up his mind there was no unmaking it, which is why I didn’t even bother trying to come between Edward and Bella.

“Jasper,” Edward whispered, “I don’t want it to be the end our friendship…if it’s true. We’ve been through too much together…and you’ve never given me reason to not trust you.”

It was my turn to be surprised by what Edward had to say. I hadn’t committed to my confession and he hadn’t committed to leaving me as a friend.

“Why don’t you kiss him,” James’ voice whispered in my ear. “You know you want to. He can’t push you away or fight you off…you could have him by the fire…I know you want that.” His breath was hot against my ear. I couldn’t help but imagine him with pointed horns growing in tight, threatening spirals from his forehead. What he wanted to push me in to was rape. I didn’t want that with or for Edward. I wanted him to be willing, not forced.

“I’m not you,” I bit out between clenched teeth. “I won’t take what’s not given to me freely.”

“See, Edward,” James said moving from the arm of the couch behind me to sit on the other side of Edward. His hand came up to gently caress Edward’s cheek before cupping the back of Edward’s head. In a firm move, James pulled Edward towards him. “He does want you. Did you see how he had to fight back his own desire before he could speak? Do you see now that he’s the one who’s been lying to you? I’ve been honest with you since the beginning, Edward. I told you that I wanted you, how beautiful you are…I even told you about Matt. I’ve been honest with you.”

I shook my head at his words. That was his game in getting me to tell Edward of my love for him. He wanted to make me out as the bad guy…the liar, untrustworthy bastard. He wanted Edward to see him as the trustworthy one…knight in white shining armor.

Edward nodded his head against James’ face, giving the illusion of nuzzling against the man.

“I did see that,” he said almost too quietly for me to hear him. “But I also know that Jasper would never do anything to hurt me…he’d leave me first.” He pulled against the hand holding him in James’ personal space. “I also saw how you twisted what he wants in to what you would do.”

“Come sun up you’re back out there digging,” James said, glaring daggers at me. He stood from the couch, pulling Edward with him. I watched as James pulled Edward to the bedroom and shoved him inside.

Surprise filled me when James pulled the door closed, leaving Edward alone in the room. He pulled a key from his pocket, slipped in to the lock and gave it a twist. The lock clicked in to place, filling the cabin with a hollow clunk. With a smile, James turned back to me.

“There are no windows in that room. I have the only key…don’t try to get him out,” he said towering over my position on the couch. “I’m going to get us some food. I’ll be back in time for you to start digging again.”

I sat on the couch watching the logs in the fire burn and trying not to count the seconds that had elapsed since James had slammed the front door, started the jeep and tore down the harsh path of a drive way. Edward had been correct in saying that I’d leave before I ever hurt him in the way that James wanted me to. It sickened me to think that James wanted Edward happy to see me dead. It would never happen. He could put the gun to my head and try to force me to take Edward, and I would gladly take the bullet. I did not want Edward to hate me or fear me. I wanted him to love me back, and he did; just not in the way that I wanted him to. And that was all right, as long as I could still be close to him.

Hearing him confirm what I already knew was very nice to hear. He trusted me. I’d known this since he and Bella had started dating and he would tell me some of the things she would tell him…generally as though she had no other choice. Edward could be quite dazzling at times. I didn’t laugh or disagree with her observation of what he smelled like, though. She was right. He often smelled of the fresh outdoor breeze. That was often layered over his natural scent of honey…I had spend many sleepless nights wondering if he also tasted of it. I could have asked Bella, but that would have been beyond awkward and weird—for both of us.

Edward knowing at all that I was in love with him was both wonderful and frightening. Wonderful because it’s in the open, no more hiding or denying that my thoughts of him go beyond what anyone thinks they should; and, frightening because now he could decide to leave our friendship behind on his way to college in the fall. With Edward there was not always middle ground.

I closed my eyes and leaned back on the couch and began to pray that this one time there could be. That he could forgive my feelings for him…feelings that I knew he would never return. I didn’t want to lose his friendship over this. If I could have him in no other way, I would take friend.

“Jasper?” Edward called through the door. “Jasper?”

“I’m here,” I called, quickly pushing myself to my feet and moving almost absentmindedly around the fire place.

“I don’t care if it’s true or not, Jazz,” he shouted through the door. “He’s been playing with us since he picked us up…he wants me to hate you. And worse he wants me to distrust and be afraid of you. I can’t do that. I won’t do that. When we get out of this nothing has to change between us…no one else has to know how he tried twisting us around.”

He’d thought about this. Bless and damn him for that.

“We don’t have anyway out of this, Edward,” I yelled through the door. “He’s going to kill me. He wants to get rid of everyone that could come between him and you.”

“I know.”

“Get some sleep. We’ll figure more out in the morning.”

I didn’t want to leave things like that, but there was no other choice. I listened through the door for him to move away. He didn’t move away from the door. A thump sounded through the door with a heavy sigh; taking me slightly by surprise…he could be stubborn when he wasn’t finished with a subject. I held my breath and waited for him to say more. He did not. The sound that greeted my ears was a light scraping and sliding noise. I could picture him on the other side of the door sitting on the floor, leaning against the thick wood, head resting on his knees.

In all of the years that I’d know Edward, I’d never seen him like this. The way he was with James around was not the Edward who’d let the air out of Mike Newton’s tires because the guy was annoying. The Edward I’d grown up with and fallen in love was strong, even through his mother’s illness and death…and his father’s re-marriage. Bella Swan hadn’t even managed to turn Edward in to a vulnerable child the way James had managed to. It was interesting to see this side of him, but not the way that side of him has come out.

Exhaustion suddenly registered in my conscious mind as I stood at the door listening to the stillness on the other side of the door. My legs wanted to collapse and my eyes did not want stay open any longer. Slowly I became aware of my body leaning in to the door as my body slid heavily down the wood. I didn’t try to fight against the blackness over taking me. Edward was locked safely in a room, James was gone until later there was no reason to fight against the sleep my body was forcing me in to.

As my mind drifted in to the blackness of unconsciousness I could have sworn that I heard Edward call my name. I could not answer.

Sun light seeped drearily through the window in the living room when my body finally allowed me to wake. I couldn’t tell what time it was by the amount of light getting through. I shivered against the cold air permeating the cabin. The fire was beyond cooling embers when I glanced at. I licked at my dried lips and reached a hand up to rake through my hair. I’d spent the night on the opposite side of a door as Edward, not as much fun as the nights I spent on the floor of his room, but better than him being trapped in there with James.

Scuffing against the floor boards on the other side of the cabin caught my attention. Looking through the fireplace I could see James moving around in the kitchen area. He had a small propane camp stove set up on the counter closest to the dining table. He seemed to be trying to be quiet. I watched in silence as he carefully placed a pan on the burner of the stove, sprayed it with cooking spray and waited for it to heat up. When he was satisfied that the pan was hot enough James laid a few strips of bacon in it.

My stomach growled loudly as I listened to the sizzling of the bacon. I had forgotten how hungry I was. We hadn’t eaten after leaving school yesterday.

“Thought you might be awake,” James said turning to look in my direction. “You know I found you sleeping outside his door cute. But then I had to wonder if he’s sitting on the other side of the door same as you. I didn’t want to wake you to find out…you have a long day of digging ahead of you.” He turned the bacon over with a fork. “I won’t have to put a gun to his head again, will I? I really hated doing that yesterday—because honestly I’d really rather not kill him.”

“No,” was all I think to say as I watched him removed the bacon from the pan and place it onto a paper towel lined plate. More pieces of bacon were placed in to the pan.

He didn’t speak again as he cooked the rest of the package of bacon. I had nothing to say as I watched him open a carton of eggs. My stomach grumbled again in desire for the food James was preparing. He wasn’t careful about cracking the eggs in to the pan. One by one he cracked the entire carton in to the pan before he poured a small chug of milk in to the pan. He quickly used the fork from the bacon to scramble the eggs and milk together.

“Come stir this while I get Edward,” James ordered leaving the pan full of eggs on the stove and heading for the door I was still sitting in front of.

Wordlessly I pulled myself to my feet. I moved away from the door and toward the kitchen. The amount of heat the small burner gave of helped to warm me up and to my surprise James’ concoction of eggs and milk were actually cooking. I watched as James pulled the key to Edward’s prison from the front pocket of his jeans. Within seconds the door was open. He leaned down to Edward, who indeed was sitting on the floor leaning against the door. I turned back to the eggs.

As I was scooping them out of the pan in to the large bowl James had placed on the counter for them when he came around the fireplace tugging Edward behind him. He’d unbound and rebound Edward’s hands from behind his back to in front of him. James tugged Edward toward the table and forced him in to a chair.

“Food ready?” he asked stepping in to the small kitchen behind me.

“Yes,” I said setting the bowl of eggs on the counter next to the plate of bacon.

“Good.” He stepped closer behind me than he’d ever come and reached around me for the dishes of food. He stepped back smoothly, food dishes securely in his hands. He placed them in the center of the small table Edward was already seated at. “Bring the other plates and forks.”

I complied with his demands silently. Listening to him and following his orders was not what I really wanted to do, however, fear that he would deny me any food before forcing me to dig my grave fueled my desire to not go against the grain of James this morning. Laying the requested items on the table beside the larger dishes of food, I slid on to the chair across from Edward.

“Plates,” James snapped, glaring at me.

I slid off the chair and stepped back in to the kitchen. Sitting on the far end of the small counter was a packed of paper plates. I reached over and grabbed them. Pulling the plastic wrap the rest of the way off I set them on the table, once again sliding on to the chair.

James dished Edward and himself hearty portions of the eggs and bacon, sliding the dishes toward me when he was finished with them. I took what was left of the eggs and the piece of bacon that was left on the plate. We ate in silence, the clanking of the handcuffs around Edward’s wrists the only sound at the table.

“Time to start digging,” James announced as I finished the food on my plate. “Why don’t you go ahead and get started without us…we’re going to finish eating.”

Edward looked up from his plate still mostly full of food to shoot me a worry filled look. I gave him a small nod before heading for the door my dirt smeared shirt and shoes sat. Pulling on the dirty items I left the cabin without a glance behind me.

It was a few degrees cooler than it had been yesterday. My breath came in visible puffs of white as I exhaled on my way across the yard. I rubbed my hands together to warm them as before reaching for the shovel. The wooden handle of the shovel scraped against the blisters dotting the surface of my palms of my hands, causing me to let a small hiss of pain. I gripped the handle more tightly as I began the task of digging the hole that would be my grave, reveling in the pain the blisters brought. In a few days I would most likely not feel anything ever again might as well enjoy every feeling I can before then.

Sweat began to bead down my forehead, pinning my shirts to my body, by the time James marched Edward from the cabin. The hole I had started yesterday was now close to four feet wide by four feet long and about a foot deep. The ground being hard for the winter was not the only reason for the slow process of the digging; I was being just fast enough to keep James happy, but not fast enough to give him an excuse to kill me any earlier than the end of the week.

James stopped Edward in the same spot as yesterday, once again forcing him to his knees. Edward looked like he was going to throw up. I didn’t wonder too hard on if James had forced him to eat the entire plate of food; I was more than certain that he had.

I tossed another shovel full of top soil on to the pile from yesterday before stopping. My hands ached from the force of my grip and I was afraid to see why they felt wet. I was more than certain I would see blood coating the handle of the shovel as well as the palms of my hands. I locked eyes with Edward for a moment. He lowered his gaze to the ground as James stepped up beside him and placed a hand in his hair.

The urge to kill the man once again surged in me.

I turned my back to James to work on making the hole longer, might as well make it large enough to accommodate my height. Biting my lip to get through the pain gripping the shovel was causing I began cutting away at the earth in front of me. Edward had looked worried and frightened before he’d looked away. James must have told him more his plan for us. It would not have surprised me if James had told Edward that after I was gone he would take Edward to somewhere no one would find him. That I would believe. I also believed that he’d head back to Forks and kill every last person that would want to look for Edward. I leaned against the shovel’s handle in a momentary respite as I considered my parents. Edward’s would have the advantage of knowing that their son was being taken away from them before James killed them. Mine would have no such news. I would just be another in a state and national bank of missing persons. No one would find my body out here…not for a good long while anyway.

Half a foot to go and the hole would grow to six feet long. I slammed the blade of the shovel in to the ground, grunting in pain, to scoop out part of the last half a foot when I heard a different grunt of pain behind me. Turning quickly I saw Edward on his feet in front of James, hands clasped together in a fist of sorts. James was leaning to the side from Edward’s blow.

Before James could recover fully Edward swung at the man again. He missed as James managed to duck away from the coming blow. He smiled and commented on Edward’s bravery before sending a solid punch to Edward’s face.

“Edward!” I yelled as his head snapped back and he lost his balance. James tackled him to the ground, straddling Edward’s waist James wrapped a hand around Edward’s throat. Edward thrashed in James’ grip, hitting his bound hands against his attackers wrist. James laughed harshly at Edward’s attempts to free himself. Using the hand wrapped around Edward’s neck James lifted him from the ground and slammed him back down. The back of Edward’s head connected solidly with the ground. Dazed he stopped struggling against James.

Unable to watch as James once again lifted Edward from the ground by his throat, I let go of the shovel and raced for their position on the ground. Before James could slam Edward’s head in to the ground for a second time I tackled the smaller man to the ground. I straddled his chest as I let a fist fly in to his shocked face.

He grunted and his face turned to the side, blood seeping from his newly split lip, from the blow. Blow after blow connected with James’ face, opening cuts over various parts of his face before he finally tried to get the upper hand. The heal of his hand connected with my cheek, forcing a cry of pain from my lips as my head snapped to the side.

As I had before, James let a barrage of hits fly at me, gaining the upper hand. I stumbled to my feet as I attempted to dodge his blows. A harsh click filled the air, stopping me where I stood. James had managed to get to his gun.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” he said, aiming his gun at Edward’s prone form. “All you had to do was dig a hole, tell him how much you want him and die quietly. Now he has to die and you get to live with the knowledge that you could have saved his life.”

“You son of a bitch,” I growled, barreling at James with as much speed as I could muster. We both grunted from exertion at we collided and landed in a tangled heap on the ground. To my utter joy the gun did not go off when we collided.

I barely evaded James’ attempt to whip me with the barrel of the gun. We both swore, yelled, and threw blows at each other. I was beginning to tire when my hand wrapped around the gun. I tried to force the gun away from my chest where James had decided to aim it. I wasn’t sure how it happened, but we had become a scene from a movie where the good guy and the bad guy wrestle for control of the gun and someone dies at the end.

I forced the gun away from me. I did not want to be the one dying. I forced James to twist his hands back and around so that the gun pointed to just below his chest. He growled as a sudden surge of energy filled me, keeping him from reversing the weapon’s position in use against him. My intention had been to twist the gun from his grasp, force him to undo the cuffs on Edward and cuff him to something, but he had other plans.

A sick smile played across James’ lips as he locked eyes with me. Together we looked down to where I held the gun. I looked back to his face and saw what he was going to do. I tried to loosen my grip on the metal of the weapon, but he wouldn’t let me. He let one hand free of our tangle of limbs and covered my hands. Smiling again at the shock on my face James moved his finger on the trigger.

“No!” I shouted, trying to pull away from James and his plan of suicide.

At the same moment James grunted in pain as a hollow thud echoed through the air. His body slowly collapsed on to mine. His eyes rolled back and his head lolled as his weight sank on to me. I could barely breathe. The gun was still lodged between us.

“Jasper!” Edward shouted pulling at the man’s body. Edward rolled James’ unconscious body from me.

I coughed as cold air rushed in to my lungs. Unconsciously I reached for the gun James still held in his hands and yanked it free. Rolling to my feet I stumbled over to the hole I’d been forced to dig and dropped the offending weapon in to it.

“Jasper?” Edward questioned standing still next to James’ body, voice unsure of my physical or mental condition.

“I’m all right,” I breathlessly assured him before forcing my body to move toward James’ prone form. Falling to my knees next to the body I searched his pockets for the keys to the cuffs encircling Edward’s wrists. I pulled a bundle of keys from the front pocket of his jeans. “Gimme your hands,” I said flipping to the smallest keys on the ring. He quickly shoved his bound hands toward me without a word. The key slid easily in to the lock. I twisted the key and we both sighed as a small click lit the air between us. The cuffs fell from Edward’s wrists to the ground at his feet.

“Thank you,” he said rubbing at the chafe marks around his wrists. “What are we going to do with him?”

“I have an idea.” Fighting back the exhaustion once again pulling at my body, I stood and reached down for James’ body. With Edward’s help we dragged his unconscious body in to the cabin and to the bed room Edward had spent the night in. We let his body fall to the floor with a thump.

Taking the keys to the jeep from the ring, I laid the other keys on the dining table.

“How do you feel about walking back to the road?” Edward asked following me to the yard.

“Edward?” I said, not meaning to make it question, panic boiling through me at the thought of walking away from this place without finally telling Edward that James was not lying about my feelings for him. At least this way we could leave it here, and pretend that it never happened. Telling him at home would make it impossible for him to live with my feelings for him. “About what James wanted me to tell you…”

“You don’t have to say anything, Jazz,” Edward said, coming to stand closer to me. “Truth or lie, I’m still your friend.”

“Edward, can I,” I started, but stopped, it was corny to ask him if I could kiss him. “There’s something I want to try.”

He stared blankly at me for a moment before asking, “What?”

Unlike the moment a day or so ago at my house, I did not fight back my urge to lean down and press my lips against his. This time I reached my hand up to lace my fingers through his silken rust colored locks, tilted his head up toward mine and gently placed a chaste kiss to his lips. I wanted to stop myself before I took things too far, before my desire for him could override my self-control, but I didn’t. I moved my lips against his carefully, showing him just enough passion to prove that what James said about me was true, but not enough to overpower him.

In a deliberate and risky move I moved my tongue along his full lower lip. To my delight and surprise Edward parted his lips and began to kiss me back. Not wasting a second of the moment I deepened the kiss and tasted of his mouth—he did taste of honey. It was the most incredible kiss I’d ever had…not that Alice wasn’t good at it, she was. But having his lips moving in sync with mine was like a dream I’d never thought would come true.

As abruptly as his lips had begun moving with mine, allowing my tongue access to his sweet taste, he stopped. For a second my hand tensed in his hair, my lips refusing to stop the wonderful dreamy feel of his lips on mine, but his sudden lack of participation in the kiss pulled me from my desire to the man trembling before me. With reluctance I dropped my hand from his hair.

His eyes were slightly wild as he looked at me. He took a smooth step away from me, eyes still watching me—questions filling his vibrant green eyes. His wet lips glistened in the light managing to make its way through the thick growth of forest canopy, making me want to once again pull him toward me and take his lips in another kiss. I fought off the urge and settled for waiting for his reaction to what I had just done. He dropped his eyes to ground after a long moment.

“Edward…” I didn’t know what to say to him. He didn’t look up from the ground at the sound of my voice. “I’m sorry.” I really wasn’t, and he more than likely knew that. He would know that I didn’t do things accidently too often. I calculated, planned and was purposeful in almost everything I did. Kissing him was something I’d always wanted to do…planned to do but never had the right opportunity to do. He would know that what James had said about me was true and that I had taken advantage of the opportunity.

He let out a shaky sigh as he ran a hand through his hair before finally looking up from the ground. The look on his face was incredulous.

“This,” he gestured between us with his hand, “can’t go any further than here.”

“I know,” I said softly. I had expected him to want to forget this ever happened. If I were being honest with myself, I would always wonder if James had managed to suggest to him that the two of us should be together instead of him honestly want to be with me. It didn’t diminish how much I wanted him. It probably should have. I probably should have been crushed by his declaration…but he had kissed me back.

“We need some time and distance from all of this madness,” he said choosing his words more carefully than I’d ever seen. He usually did speak carefully, as though he were editing his thoughts as we spoke, but never this carefully.

“Are we…did I…we’re still friends, aren’t we?” I needed to know that I hadn’t just killed our friendship in one moment of giving in to my desire for him.

“The best of,” he assured me with a smile. “I just need time to process all of this.”

“Fair enough,” I said in agreement with him. We did need time to move past James and his lustful interference in our lives. Though in a small way I couldn’t help but be thankful to James for allowing me the opportunity to do something I’d always wanted to do—kiss Edward Cullen.

“Can we get out of here now?” He asked glancing nervously at the cabin.

“How do you feel about walking?” I asked tossing the keys to the jeep at it. I really didn’t feel like ever getting in that thing again. Twice I had been kidnapped in it…I really didn’t want to push for a third time. “I really don’t want to get back in to that thing.”

Edward nodded in agreement and headed down the path of a driveway toward the road.

We didn’t speak as we walked down the path that was actually as long as James had said it was. We didn’t hold hands and skip merrily along to the road. More than once I fought back my urge to take his hand and hold it. We did stop each other from slipping on the occasional patch of ice, but maintained no other physical contact. The silence made the walk that much longer, but I was afraid to break it…afraid that Edward might change his mind and toss away our friendship sooner than college if I dared speak.

I could hear the traffic on the highway long before I could see the pavement of the road. Hope filled me that this would soon be over and things could get back to being normal. Or as normal as things could be now that he knew I wanted him.

“Jasper,” Edward said stopping just shy of the line between the turn off and the highway. The uncertainty in his voice stopped me a half step a head of him. I turned to face him. He looked nervous and afraid. “I don’t want us to leave this place with you thinking that I want to forget everything. There’s just so much…”

“Edward, I don’t want anything you don’t. I will not force myself at you…I never did before. The ball, as they say, is in your court and I will wait for your next move…just please don’t lead me on. If you want me in no other capacity than as a friend then I will keep that and move on romantically,” I said, hoping to reassure him that whatever he needed I would give him; no pressure, no strings. Relief seemed to wash over his features and he took a step forward. I moved to allow him ahead of me.

He stepped from the growth nearly obscuring the drive to the pavement of the highway. I followed a second later. To my, and I am certain Edward’s, disappointment the highway that had been full of vehicle sounds a half hour ago was now void of cars. We turned right and begin walking. The hope was that since James had been right about the length of the dive way, he was also correct about how far from Forks we really were.

After ten minutes of walking along the loose gravel of the highway shoulder a highway patrol cruiser pulled over in front of us. The officer climbed from the vehicle and carefully approached us. Neither of us moved from where we’d stopped. I really didn’t have the energy to move much further anyway, and I could guess that Edward didn’t either.

“Are you Edward Cullen and Jasper Whitlock?” he asked stopping a few feet in front of us.

“Yes,” we answered in unison.

He nodded and pulled at the radio on attached to a strap on his shoulder. He pushed a button and informed the operator on the other end that he’d found the missing teens. He began to usher us toward his cruiser, mumbling something about runaways. I stepped away from his car.

“Runaway?” I questioned in a harsh tone. “Is that what you think?” He gave a curt nod of his head. “We didn’t run anywhere. We were taken from Edward’s house by a very sick man who has it in his head that Edward is in love with him and was going to kill me to get Edward to leave with him!” My voice had raised to a shout as neared the end of my anger fueled tirade.

“My mistake,” the officer acquiesced. “Where is this man?”

“About half a mile back up the road there’s a turn off, it leads to a cabin. We locked him a room.”

The look on the officer’s face spoke louder than his words as he agreed to take us back to the cabin. He didn’t believe us. He honestly wanted to believe that we had runaway. Being cold and tired that we were, Edward and I climbed in to the backseat of the cruiser. He offered us blankets from the trunk that we gladly accepted. He climbed behind the wheel of the car, radioed in that he was going to check out our story and his position, and then quickly turned the car back in the direction we’d spent much of the day walking away from.

He turned where we told him to. After a mile he voiced that he was beginning to doubt our story. Edward told him quietly that it’s a five mile long road. The officer nodded, clenched his jaw and continued driving. He turned on his headlights when the canopy of tree branches and leaves became too thick to allow much natural light through. Moments later the jeep and cabin came in to view. The officer swore and I smiled. He once again radioed his headquarters with where he was and requested more officers.

“His gun is in that hole over there,” I said pointing to the trees to the left of the cabin. The shovel stood where I’d left it driven in to the cold hardness of the earth.

Muffled shouts could be heard inside the cabin. The officer turned his head from the hole I’d been forced to dig to the cabin and then to Edward and me.

“That’s the man who took us,” I said confirming the questions written on his face.

“Stay here,” he commanded. I didn’t bother telling the officer that neither of us wanted to be anywhere near James ever again, and that him being locked up in that room was too close.

“The key is on the table,” I shouted after the officer’s retreating form.

FIN
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Last Christmas