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The princess and the walnut AKA princess furball	By : MenomaMinx Category: Fairy Tales, Fables, Folklore, Legends, and Myth > Fairy Tales Views: 11224 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own The princess and the walnut AKA princess furball and make no money off this story.

Chapter List
- 1-The princess and the walnut AKA princess furball
- 1
From what I remember of the original:
Once upon a time, in kingdom with no morals, lived a king, a queen and their infant daughter. This queen's only redeeming quality was that she was exceptionally beautiful. She was also incredibly selfish and shortsighted, but we'll get to that in a moment.
Now as far as anybody knew, in this kingdom centuries before mass transportation was available for comparison purposes, this queen was the most beautiful woman who ever lived - and she didn't live very long. On her deathbed, she made her husband the king promise never to marry anyone who wasn't as pretty as she was. Being in love, and equally shortsighted, he agreed.
So their little girl grew up without a mother, except the more she grew up, the more she looked like her mother. By the time she was a teenager, she looked exactly like her mother. The king took the princess's appearance as a sign from God that he should marry his own daughter. After all, who could ever equal his wife's beauty but their very own child? And he rushed off to tell his daughter what he considered to be the good news.
The daughter was horrified and had to think fast. After all, her position in this situation was rather helpless. Women were little more than property in that day and age and because of her father' s position of significant power, absolutely no one was going to help her if her father decided to just have them both declared married against her will so he could rape her at will. Yep, she was scared, but not stupid. She remembered that every bride was entitled to a have a payment made by the groom to her family in exchange for her hand in marriage. She decided to make such impossible demands to pay for her hand in marriage that her father would never be able to come up with them - thus she would remain safe.
She told her father she would require three dresses: one like the sun, another like the moon, and yet another like stars. And just to be on the safe side, after he agreed to the others, she also demanded a fur coat containing fur from absolutely every creature in the kingdom and she's thinking there is absolutely no way her father can come up with these imaginary things she just made up.
She was absolutely wrong. Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a pervert with a screw loose ;-) Took him a little while, but eventually the king was able to bully and bribe his subjects into getting all those things for him. The wedding date was set for the very next morning .
Around midnight the princess made a break for it. She threw on her fur coat and stuffed the three dresses made of light into a walnut shell. She also grabbed some small remembrances of her mother: a ring, a thimble, and a spindle that belonged to the queen when she was still alive. She lowered herself out the window and ran out into the woods. She ran and ran until she passed out from exhaustion and when she woke up she ran again. After a few days of this, she was filthy - completely unrecognizable as the pampered princess of the castle. The king's men passing by took her to be a runaway servant and they carried her back to the castle kitchen where she was put to work.
Now having never worked a day in her life, the princess was incredibly clumsy. Constantly knocking things over. The consensus among the kitchen staff was that she wasn't good for anything but stirring soup - which is what they had her do. Even at this simple task, she was always knocking things accidentally into the soup.
As the days went on, the princess became less and less cautious about concealing her identity and more and more miserable with the repetitive task in front of her. When the staff were informed that they were to prepare for a party, the princess became determined to attend as a guest despite the risks. Apparently her mother's shortsightedness was genetic.
The day of the party the princess was especially hurried in her work and as she changed into the dress like the stars, she managed to knock her mother's thimble accidentally into the soup.
Fortunately, the light from the dress was so bright it made it difficult for the princess to be identified. At one point she found herself dancing with a king himself without him knowing her identity. Unfortunately, the lost thimble ended up in the king's soup bowl. The king demanded that the person who made the soup be brought before him once . The princess had to scramble to get back to the kitchen and back into her servant guise and no sooner had she done so was she dragged before the king. Her worst fears realized, the king had recognized a thimble as his dead wife's. The king demanded answers, but his daughter refused to tell him anything more than the fact that she had made the soup. Frustrated, but willing to wait out his servant's stubbornness, the king sent her back to the kitchen in the hopes eventually she would change her mind in telling the truth about where the thimble came from.
After such a close call, you would think the princess would come to her senses and give up the partying. Yes, you would think that, but the point is the princess just didn't think, so the next party that came around she pulled the exact same stunt - different dress, different day, same stupidity ;-)
This time she wore the dress made like the moon. She was dancing the night away and having a very good time in the process when she heard her father bellowing about something in his soup again. Back she ran to the kitchen and once again the same story played itself out - this time with a spindle in the soup instead of a thimble, but yeah, this girl just didn't learn from her mistakes.
The next party rolled around and the princess had convinced herself the other two times of being nearly caught were just flukes. So off she went to the party in her dress made like the sun. Big mistake! It wasn't long before the king started yelling about his soup and the princess found herself running headlong back to the kitchen. She was in such a panic, she didn't even bother to change out of her dress like the sun. Instead, she just put her her everyday fur coat on over it and threw some fireplace soot on herself.
The king was furious. In his soup had been his deceased wife's wedding ring. He demanded to know where the princess had gotten it from.
The princess was panicking. The more frightened she got the more she began to shake . Her trembling caused her coat to intermittently reveal the dress underneath - which was shining brightly.
The king, finally catching on, ripped the fur coat off her body, revealing the dress underneath. He wiped off her face and thus confirming her identity, demanded she marry him on the spot. Now this is where the story becomes truly chilling, not because of what it says, but because of what it doesn't say. You see, story I read claimed they were married at this moment and lived long happy lives together. That's pretty much all it said. What it didn't say is how they got to that point. No matter how I imagine it, I can't imagine anything happy about this situation. It's almost as if the original storyteller got carried away with the story and suddenly realized that the child that fell asleep during the beginning of the story was suddenly awake for the ending - and they didn't want to tell that kind of ending to a child. At least, that would be it if this happened today in these times. Most American fairy tales originated in Europe and European royalty have always been set on marrying their relatives until very recently. It was their way of keeping power in the family. Nowhere near as bad as the Egyptian royalty, who saw nothing wrong with brother and sister marriages around the time this story was originally circulating, but still well-known enough to the general populace that arrangement like this father and daughter story - although unusual, certainly not unbelievable human behavior for their time.
I was somewhere between nine and 12 years old when I first read it in a collection of fairy tales. Never occurred to me there are any other significantly different versions.
97..us/instruct/ftcyber/furball/
the second grade class's politically correct version with some substantial rewrites. I thought adding the ogre in place of the father was an interesting touch - it's probably the most out of place element of the rewrite.
It's not just this fairy tale either that has such a horrific theme. Even Cinderella yes, the one Disney made a movie out of is actually pretty bloody - literally. The evil stepsisters cut off their own toes in order to fit their feet into the much too small for them glass slipper which is actually made of fur if you go back far enough - "glass" was originally a mistranslation of the word "fur" when the story was collected by writers for mass distribution, so glass is the version everyone remembers. Anyway, a little bird would fly up to the carriage and whisper into the princess ear each time he drove away with the wrong sister thinking she was the right girl because the shoe fit. The bird within a little song about how the blood told the truth, and sure enough, the prince would look down and see the bloody shoe - and thus drive back to try this to on the other women of the household. This story says he knew he had the real Cinderella when the shoe wasn't covered in blood on the way home to the castle.
Quick copyright note: the fairy tale called alternatively "the princess and the Walnut" as well as "princess furball" was never under copyright by anyone as its an old European fairy tale; however, the exact words I used to retell this story and my opinions about characters are mine alone. My source material is older than the one being sold on Amazondotcom and in other story collections, which actually politically correct versions of this tale. The incest and all the elements within were present in the original version of the story I read as a child. It was my outrage over finding out that the politically correct version with the predominate one that people were promoting as the true version of this story that prompted me to post this. Just because culture from previous generations of humanity makes you uncomfortable doesn't mean it's not part of your heritage as a human being. To censor the past is to be controled in the future by people who don't.
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The princess and the walnut AKA princess furball